Posted by Carlos Xuma | Posted on 16-11-2010
Women everywhere giggle at the sound of Casanova’s name. And men? Men everywhere call him gay, hate him or ignore him… mostly out of jealousy that they do their best to hide. But why does Casanova, the 18th century seducer still affect people to this very day?
Short answer: no one has played the dating game as well as he did before him… OR after him. But let me first introduce him to you so you know what he looked like:
Looks like a spoiled rich snob with fake hair doesn’t he? Yet still, in his day? Giacomo Casanova attracted hundreds of women from pretty much every country in Europe. Hell, he was so good that even today you immediately think of 2 words when you hear Casanova: romantic + womanizer.
Needless to say, you could learn a whole bunch of stuff from the world’s greatest seducer. I have been studying him for years now. And I think it’s about time that I share what I’ve learned, right?
Casanova’s First Secret of Seduction: Attraction Is Relative
What happens when you meet a poor girl from the ghettos of Brazil and take her to a three star restaurant, go out with her in a club where the entry fee is $10, and then take her to your three star hotel room? I know Giacomo Casanova knew, but do YOU know?
She will love you to death for it! Why? Because she can’t resist your exciting lifestyle, fancy clothes, and smooth moves on the dance floor. To HER it’s exciting. Three stars is more than she ever had.
And now ask yourself: what happens when you do all the same things as I mentioned above, but with the girl next door?
She’ll like it, but then asks you why the room service was late, why you got a room with no view, why they didn’t have any Chinese food on the menu in the restaurant, and so on.
The essential ingredient of the dating game I’m about to explain to you has only been understood by two people on the planet: Giacomo Casanova and me, Carlos Xuma.
And no that’s not bragging, because think about the following. You probably already know this if you’ve read some of my other blog posts:
Women are attracted to an exciting lifestyle. Plus, women are attracted to dominant men. Last but not least: women are attracted to humor (playful teasing). But…
- What IS an exciting lifestyle? A lifestyle that’s more exciting COMPARED TO her own lifestyle
- What IS a dominant male? A guy who leads way more COMPARED TO other guys she knows
- What IS a guy with a good sense of humor? A guy that makes here laugh MORE THAN anyone
Do you see where I’m going with this? Every single way of creating attraction is relative, because it creates attraction when compared to others guys OR her own life…
Your lifestyle’s only exciting (= attractive) if she thinks it’s better than her own. Casanova knew.
If she has known only men who led the way all her life ,then the only way you’re seen as a leader is if you’re MORE dominant than the guys before you, and so on.
And this is where we have to thank Casanova and his seductive ways. Why? Because he put women in situations where he was ALWAYS better compared to what they were used to…
So, he took poor girls to a ball where everyone wore nothing but expensive clothing and jewels. His lifestyle was more exciting than that of the rich lady’s husband because he tried to seduce her right in front of him. And the list goes on and on.
The other big lesson Casanova teaches us here:
Why try and be dominant around a woman who has had leaders around her all her life? She’s used to much more dominance so attracting here with dominance will be one tough feat to pull off. It’s way better to attract her with something else in that case. Something like an exciting lifestyle.
But if this sounds too complicated for you, I understand. This is advanced dating school bro! And you may need some more help or some more tips before you see the big picture.
You may need some more tips before you can get the kind of girl that you have always dreamed of. But that’s normal!
And if you want to get tips to get you started with creating attraction or even more advanced tips?
Then check out my Inner Game newsletter by clicking here right away. It only takes a minute of your time to get way more awesome tips to improve your love life and social life, so get that newsletter now! Because I won’t have this newsletter up and running forever you know.
Casanova’s Second Secret of Seduction: Prepare To Seduce
What you’re about to discover is how Casanova conquered the hearts of dozens and dozens of women by living the moment, after the right preparation! Romance was never a part of his plan.
You see, what he would do is rent a real fancy room before he went on a date with a woman for example. He would place chandeliers with candles all over the room, sprayed cologne so the entire room smelt really nice, let a chef prepare the best food ever, and then he would bring in the girl.
The association of Casanova with romance that everyone makes has nothing to do with him being actually romantic. He simply prepared to seduce women really, really well.
He always created the perfect setting for a woman to either fall in love or be persuaded to have sex… or both. And these days? That’s very rare. No man makes an effort of doing it, except me of course.
Hell, I don’t know a single guy who “accidentally” leaves a chick flick that women love on the couch before he goes on a date with a woman whom he knows will come inside with him. Or who places chandeliers and candles all over the place. Or who accidentally leaves romantic poems lying around on his bed, and so forth.
Meanwhile, this is the topic of sleazy romance novels women devour at least once a month if not more. It’s the idea that fills their fantasies: to meet the perfect romantic who puts them in a situation where they can do nothing but have passionate sex.
But no. What do most men do? “Come inside! Want a drink? Oops, I’m sorry for those dirty clothes on the floor. Won’t happen again. Promise!”
How’s that for a mood killer? Casanova would turn over in his grave. Hell, he has probably spun around more than the world because of the millions of ignorant men on the face of the earth.
Prepare, prepare, and prepare. Not for yourself, but for her.
Before you go out on a date or let ANY woman come inside your home, ask yourself: how can I make the perfect setting in which she will relax, enjoy herself, and let herself be seduced?
Because another secret Casanova knew about was that WOMEN WANT TO BE SEDUCED. That’s why they read all those sleazy romance novels, watch chick flicks with endless Romeo and Juliet type scenarios, and bla bla bla.
Stuff that always works to get women in the mood for loving like Giacomo did:
- Massage oil
- Alcohol. Not 80% rum like men like, but women’s alcohol like wine and piña colada
- Romantic music and movies
- Poems. You don’t even have to write those poems yourself: Google and print!
- Sex toys. Guess what happens when a woman finds your “secret” stash of handcuffs and the like?
You know what they say right? Preparation is half the work. It’s especially true in the dating game.
Casanova’s Third Secret of Seduction: Urgency
I’m willing to bet you that if Casanova would have focused on building a business back in the 18th century? He would have been the Apple of the 1800’s back then. Why? Because he understood the important principle of urgency.
So how does this urgency principle, that he understood so well, work? It certainly doesn’t have anything to do with what Casanova Heath Ledger did in some stupid movie that portrayed a FAKE Casanova. So what does it have to do with then?
Human beings, including women, are wired in a way that if they can choose between deciding now and deciding later? They decide later. It’s because we want to avoid pain and seek pleasure. Since a decision can have unforeseen consequences, we subconsciously think it’s a risk to make a decision. So we avoid it because it can end up being painful.
However, when you say “you can only make a decision now or you will never be able to”? We fear we will lose something, in this case a choice. Loss is associated with pain, huge pain. That’s why we want to avoid loss even more than we want to avoid risk, because loss is CERTAIN pain and we’re not so sure if a risk will give us pain.
The result: making stuff urgent works. It works really well, because it forces people to choose now or suffer the consequences. They won’t get it if they don’t choose now.
If you go back to the last paragraph of the first secret by the way, then you’ll actually see me use urgency to make sure you get my newsletter with more free tips (and no spam). Bet you didn’t notice that, did you!? Moving on…
So how does urgency relate to the dating game?
Casanova traveled around. All the time. He attracted Spanish women… in Spain. Greek women… in Greece. And so on. He was on the move all the time, so he was only available for women that liked him a short period of time. And they knew it!
The big secret is this: when you create attraction and you see the signs a woman likes you, guess what happens when you give her a now or never situation? She picks now and sleeps with you.
It’s either that or she loses you forever. And we all want to avoid pain, remember?
Plus, by saying you are leaving you are much harder to get than the average man. Women don’t want average, they want a challenge because they love the thrill of the chase as much as we do. And what will you be by giving them a limited timeframe? Hard to get. A challenge!
This means you can actually travel around and let women know in advance that you’re leaving. But it also means you can TELL women you’re leaving soon. Hey man, I don’t judge. Just do what works and keep doing it.
Casanova didn’t judge either. Hell, he never judged, as you’re about to discover…
Casanova’s Fourth Secret of Seduction: No Barriers!
How much do YOU care about a woman’s age? Her race? Her religion? Her sexuality? Oh come on! Don’t lie to me dude. You DO care… if it’s not about race, religion or sexuality then you care about her age, don’t you?
The secret: him not accepting artificial barriers is what made Casanova attract so many women.
And it makes sense too: instead of judging women on 6 qualities (age, race, religion, sexuality, beauty, attraction) you only judge her on two. Which ones? Beauty and the attraction she creates. The result is that you have so much more choice. So much more opportunities to meet women no matter where you are.
1) Screw age! Casanova attracted women much younger than him. Think 18 while he was 30 here. But he also attracted women older than him: he was 20 when she was 28, he was 30 while she was near her fifties, and so on. The fact that society, your neighbors, or even a freaking LAW says that there is an age limit doesn’t automatically make it so that dating older or younger women is forbidden! Stop caring.
2) Screw race! So what if a woman is Asian while you’re Caucasian? Or when you’re African and she’s Scandinavian? If she’s beautiful and you want her? Go get her. Yes, even when your (racist) society, parents, and friends say so. It is YOUR life and YOU are its sole king. Casanova dated Turkish, Greek, Dutch, German, Austrian, Spanish, and French women… and then some. So should you, if you want.
3) Screw religion! Muslims can’t date non-Muslims and can’t have sex before marriage. Christians can’t have sex before marriage either. So!? Just because she’s religious doesn’t mean she can’t be attracted. As long as there’s a psychological need, a woman can be attracted. Religion or not, doesn’t matter. Casanova knew this: wherever he saw a woman in need, he fulfilled her needs despite her religion. I’ve dated Muslims, Christians, Hindu chicks. There’s no difference to me. Only beauty and attraction exist in my book. Start reading in the same book as I do, know what I mean?
4) Screw her sexuality! Admit it or not, but it’s very likely that you feel intimidated when a woman mentions she’s bisexual or wants a threesome. Why? Your male ego is used to having her all for yourself, but why would you need to? Even if a woman is bisexual, wants only threesomes, and has slept with 100 people… so? It’s awesome as long as you play safe. Don’t let society make you believe that women with lots of sexual experience are sluts while men with just as much skills are not. And besides, women who are more experienced in bed can teach you stuff. A LOT of stuff
The moral of Casanova’s story here is: don’t let society tell you which women you can’t attract. And that includes your parents, friends, religious leaders… and even your ego.
Don’t accept ANY barrier and you’ll have access to female beauty from all walks of life. What else do you want? A way to easily create attraction with ANY woman you want perhaps?
Then my Inner Game newsletter has got your back! Check it out if you want more awesome free tips like the ones I’ve just given you. It only takes a minute to start getting my newsletter anyways, so make sure you get those tips today my friend.
And now this protégé of Casanova is going to create some more relative attraction, to prepare to seduce, to break all barriers, and to introduce urgency into my girlfriend’s life…
And when are you going to use Giacomo Casanova’s four secrets of seduction in YOUR life? Tell me!
To More Dating Success,
Win With Women
P.S. Want more free tips about what I've talked about today? About improving your confidence, approaching women, creating attraction, and more? Make sure you get your secrets, ebooks, and email updates by signing up for my newsletter below NOW. Remember, it only takes 60 seconds to learn more about meeting and dating women, so do it. Sign up below.