Rejection is everywhere waiting to sneak up and ruin your plans.

But it doesn’t have to be so hard – or so brutal on you. You can avoid all the pain and suffering of dating rejection if you know how to get a girl to like you.

And most men don’t understand the value in knowing how to use physical touch to get a girl feeling that gut-level physical attraction.

In fact, most guys think that you need to get her interested and attracted to you BEFORE you touch her – which is a HUGE mistake.

It’s the other way around…

Because there are different ways to touch a girl, and each communicates something different…

But one thing is for certain:

In order for her to start thinking about you sexually, she needs you to initiate touch – in the right way.

Yeah, you gotta be smooth and natural with it. Because there’s actually nothing that will kill the attraction vibe faster than getting too touchy with a girl too fast.

But if you wait too long, you’ll risk her putting you into the Friends zone.

So right away, you need to make sure she’s in what I call the “touch zone.” This is the place where she feels she knows you enough and trusts you enough to let her touch you at all.

In the first few minutes, it’s probably not a good idea to get too “handsy” with her. But after a few minutes of conversation – high energy, interesting conversation – she’ll be ready.

One way you can touch her right away is simply to clasp her hand with yours when you meet her. Don’t shake her hand like a dude – just hold it gently in yours.

Almost like you’re going to do the old fashioned “kiss the hand” – but you’re not. (No, really, don’t. This is enough.)

You simply don’t want to wait TOO long to touch her, and this gets it out of the way quickly.

And the really cool part of using touch effectively with girls is that it has the side-effect of making her more compliant to your requests. She’ll be more in agreement with your suggestions, and you can lead her exactly where you want her to go.

This is because men who touch women are seen as dominant – the Alpha Men of the dating world. And girls are genetically programmed to desire the dominant man.

So when you touch a woman, part of it is meant to communicate that you’re the Alpha of the pack – and she needs understand this message early on with you.

So let’s go over how to touch a girl to create an unstoppable level of desire in her… and get her to like you within minutes.

Get her interested: Touching tip #1 – Be cool, and be casual

The first contact with her should be very laid back and non-sexual in nature.

The beauty of this is that it doesn’t matter what kind of touch it is – it still has the same effect: Her body will release the hormone Oxytocin – which creates a bond between her and you.

This happens below her conscious level of awareness.

You also want to keep the touch short.

If you lay a hand on her, or brush up on her for too long it will feel a bit creepy. And you always want your touch to end BEFORE she wants it to. That way she will feel attraction instead of a burst of “eww…”

Keep it short and sweet and it will keep her interested.

How to touch a girl tip #2: Mind your targets…

Knowing when to touch a girl is important. But just as important is knowing WHERE to touch her.

There are some hot zones on a girl’s body that you should know about:

– Her back:

The small of a woman’s back – just above her butt – is a perfect place to touch her. There seems to be an immediate erotic charge that erupts from her spine when a girl feels your hand there.

The perfect way to initiate touch there is to simply apply a little pressure with the palm of your hand as you’re passing by her.

It’s most convenient if you’re in a bar or club where the crowd already puts you close together with her. You can use the hustle and bustle as an excuse to move her with your hand.

– Her upper and lower arms:

You can start out by delicately touching her hand.

Later you can work up to her forearm. And then eventually to her upper arms.

Her arms are a fairly inoffensive area that doesn’t feel TOO sexual, but still gives her a sexual charge when touched effectively there.

A word of caution when you do touch her:

For some silly reason, guys tend to want to look as they touch a girl. They watch their hand when they touch a girl – as if they’re saying, “Holy crap! I’m touching a girl… This is A-MAZING!”

Don’t look at your hand as you touch her. It draws way too much unnecessary attention to your moves. It’s creepy, and it makes everything feel unnatural.

And you also want to be in close proximity when you do touch her. Nothing looks – or feels – weirder than a guy reaching all the way across a table just to touch a girl.

Eww…

Ready to touch – tip #3: Emphasize the high points

One of the best strategies for touching a girl is to touch her right when the conversation is at an emotional high point.

If she’s laughing at something you said, then you laugh along with her and put your hand on hers. Or touch her on the arm.

What you’re doing is anchoring the emotional peaks to … YOU.

When she experiences something positive, you make sure you’re a part of it. Then she’s going to associate you with it and think of you.

You can also cup her elbow gently for a nice emphasis point.

In the same way, you DON’T want to touch her if she’s upset or experiencing anything negative.

Remember what you’re trying to do with touch:

– Build sexual tension
– Anchor positive emotions
– Drive up sexual anticipation

Remember that you’re trying to touch her just a little LESS than what she wants. This creates the level of sexual anticipation and desire that you need.

Explosive Touch Tip #4: Connect with her when things get serious

Over the course of the conversation, you’ll want to take note when she starts opening up about the personal stuff in her life. This is ALSO a good time to connect with her physically because it will validate her feelings.

It’s a subtle way to acknowledge her deeper thoughts which will make her feel that you “get” her.

Like with the last tip, a well-timed touch in this situation will strengthen your emotional bond with her. That way, her mind will establish a connection between those key emotions and your presence.

Here are some examples of how to pull this off:

– When she talks about a recent accomplishment (like getting a promotion at work or passing a test), offer some words of praise (e.g. “You badass!”, “Hey, watch out, we’ve a got a badass over here!”) followed by a high-five or playful punch to the arm/shoulder.

– Give her a quick, sympathetic “there here” tap on the arm or hand if she tells about a difficult time she had to get through. Say something like, “Wow…that sucks, but hey, at least you got through it.” Giving her a brief, friendly rub with your hand to underscore the moment is another variation that works too.

Remember, this is just meant to punctuate those key moments, so don’t linger too much when touching her. It’s supposed to work as an afterthought, so it registers in the back of her mind without raising any “creep alarms.”

Touching Her the Right Way 5#: Find the right balance

As far as the big picture goes, you’ll have to walk the fine between overstepping her boundaries and being afraid to make physical contact.

One on hand, NEVER be sorry for doing it. If you act like there’s something wrong with touching a girl, she’ll pick up on that nervous energy and AGREE with it.

Don’t give her a reason to feel any shred of doubt when you make physical contact with her. The less you make a big deal out of it, the more confident you’ll seem.

This is single most important attitude to have when touching a girl. The best way to put her at ease is having confidence in the fact that there’s nothing wrong with breaking the touch barrier.

However, you’ll also want to avoid going to the other end of the spectrum. Leaning in too hard into her without a valid reason is going to ruin your chances with her.

The rule of thumb when touching a girl is always having some context BEFORE doing it. Otherwise, it’ll seem out of place and stand out too much in her mind.

Pay attention to her body language cues. If she flinches or doesn’t look at ease when you touch her, you need to work on raising her comfort level during the conversation before trying again.

Joking around and giving her a “hard time” are good ways to do this.

Don’t feel bad or let her see that you’re bummed out about it when she retreats – it just means she still needs a little more time to warm up to you.

However, there is a little known shortcut that will help you bypass ALL of her defenses. Once you figure out how to flip the hidden switch in her head that triggers her Lust Response (every woman has this!), you’ll find it WAY EASIER to touch her.

In fact, she’ll be the one who won’t be able to keep her hands to herself.

But not a lot of men know how to do this. If you’re interested to learn the dead simple way to unleash a woman’s wild side, click here to find out more.

The post How To Get A Girl To Like You – How To Touch A Girl (Part 2 of 3) appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Doesn’t matter if it’s for a weekend or for months, either.

And I don’t just want to show you how to get a girl to LIKE you… I want these women to fall madly in love – where they would literally drag you into bed for sweaty, no holds barred passion that would embarrass an adult film star.

So what I thought I’d do is to share 5 of my tips for how to get a girl in your life – and in your bed.

Tip 1: Talk Yourself Up – Without Being a Douche

Guys instinctively know that they need to get their accomplishments out on the table in front of her as fast as they can. Unfortunately, most guys do this buy bragging. And that just comes across as douchey.

What you need is a method to tell her about who you are and what you’re capable of, without making it sound like you’re boasting. And – at the same time – you do still want to come across as confident.

But not TOO confident, right?

Damn, this attraction stuff seems hard sometimes.

Well, it’s not really all that difficult if you know HOW to tactfully talk yourself up.

If you speak another language (even if only a little), or you snowboard, or play the piano, you definitely need to let her know about that.

Any skill that you have is something that says “I’m confident and capable” to her. She needs to know that you’re competent.

Skills or talents you have are sexy to women, and effectively revealing them makes you appear more dynamic to her.

The trick is sliding them into conversation naturally, so you don’t come off as awkward — or like you’re blowing you’re own horn. Wait for the right opportunity, and slip it in nonchalantly. She will notice it.

Just be subtle.

Tip 2: Use Your Masculine Voice

Don’t shout at her, but you should be using your projection when you talk to her. If she has to say “Huh?” all the time to get you to speak up, you’re going to look like a wuss.

Remember, confidence is not communicated in a soft, delicate voice. It’s in the deep resonance of your chest and stomach that will hit her right in her turn-on button.

Especially because your voice will tend to get pinched and nervous when you are. So you have to relax, use deep breathing, and even hum to yourself before the date. This will serve to get your voice in proper shape for talking to her.

According to a new study, men and women make subtle changes in their voice when talking to someone they are attracted to.

The study, performed by Stirling University, reviewed the vocal ranges of men and women in dating scenarios.

The research, led by Stirling’s Juan David Leongomez, also found that these subtle voice changes make the speaker appear more attractive to the person they’re talking to. The research team studied 110 heterosexual individuals, who were either English of Czech native speakers. (The findings are true globally, however.)

They compared the vocal patterns of men and women. When they were talking to people they perceived as attractive versus people they thought were unattractive, the vocal changes were significant.

Men were found to speak in a more ‘sing-songy’ voice when talking to women they found attractive.

They weren’t actually singing, mind you. Just using more vocal variation.

They also spoke deeper to make themselves sound ‘more masculine’ which is very effective.

So don’t be afraid to be heard…

Tip 3: Tease To Please

By now you’ve probably heard of my formula for attraction, and one of the critical elements is knowing when and how to tease a woman.

You see most guys play it way too safe, and they wind up being “blocked” in her head. She immediately classifies them as “too safe” and “boring.” And then she can never go back to thinking of him sexually again.

This is usually because most guys hold back and watch what they say. They also go out of their way to agree with what she says, which totally kills attraction.

Most of the time, she knows she isn’t even saying what she really means, so when a guy agrees too much, she picks up on the disconnect.

One of the best ways to make sure she never puts you into the friends zone is to tease her a little bit. Disagree with her on occasion.

Just keep it lighthearted and funny, NOT mean-spirited.

Conversation with a woman should always be flirtatious and playful – with a lot of up-and-down energy to keep her interested. Guys try too hard to keep the energy either aggro or way too calm.

You want her laughing, having fun, and feeling challenged all at the same time.

Tip 4: Be Vulnerable

This one is critical.

So many guys try to keep themselves up on a pedestal, portraying themselves as being invulnerable and heroic, but they forget that a woman needs to see a small amount of his human weakness in the mix.

Scientists have actually quantified what makes people become friends (and eventually more). And to create any kind of trusting bond, you have to have a minimum amount of vulnerability, or there will always be a distance.

You don’t have to tell her the deepest, darkest things about you, but you should have a good story you can pull out that will get her feeling you’re relateable. Tell a story that highlights a goofy or awkward moment.

Talk about your first time skiing or parasailing, including the part about how you took a spill on the lift, or how you stumbled through your landing.

Stories with a little self-deprecation show a woman that you’re comfortable in your own skin. And that you’re resilient enough to handle tough situations with a positive attitude.

Tip 5: Know When to Get Help

I often do research on the “state of the union” when it comes to men’s dating advice. I’m always blown away by the pathetic advice a lot of the so called “gurus” and advisors out there give.

One site I saw suggested that you “take her out to Thai.” As in, go to a Thai restaurant with her.

Seriously? This is “Advice”?

What if she doesn’t like Thai? Is there a substitute?

C’mon, guys deserve better than this.

Even more annoying is the fact that dating tips like this always say pretty much the same thing:

“Try and impress her with the same lame crap that nice guys everywhere use to meet women. Spend money on her, compliment her blindly, and then try to disguise your sexual desires as much as possible. And if you’re LUCKY, you might get a kiss goodnight.”

Tell me, how often has that approach worked for you?

Probably not much.

And I don’t like leaving my love life up to fate and chance. I want to make it kneel before me and give me what I deserve.

Look, the reason you’re still here reading this is because you’re probably not getting the level of success with women you really want.

Maybe you’re not dating at all, and you want some new options for dating.

Maybe you’re dating on occasion, but you can’t seal the deal.

Maybe you’ve got some women in your life, but you feel like you’re settling.

And no matter what the situation, you want MORE.

You want what the other guys seem to get without having to try…

And you know what? You’re right for wanting that.

That’s when it’s time to get some help from someone who can give you the success you want.

I’ve put together a program to help you do exactly that: Succeed with women.

Men Say: This Secret Underground System Gets You Women Without Lines, Scripts, Or Rejection…
Go discover how  <– Click HERE

The post 5 Tips For How To Get That Girl appeared first on How To Win With Women.

And in case you’re asking yourself what made ME the expert on how to do flirting, then my answer’s: I didn’t, but women did. You see, I know how women think in the dating game.

I know because I’ve been trying to learn how to do flirting myself for many, many years now. Plus, I’ve successfully coached hundreds of guys with meeting and dating women during the last 3 years or so… so you could say that I know what I’m talking about.

Hey, I’m not saying I have ALL the answers when it comes to how to do flirting, but I will tell you this:

Once you know how women think and what attracts them when you’re flirting with them like I know? It’s a matter of time before you’ll get dates here, there, and every freaking where!

So, let’s see what knowing how to do flirting boils down to, shall we?

Learning How To Do Flirting Is Learning A “Secret Language”

The most important thing you can ever learn about how to do flirting with women is that normal language and social behavior DO NOT WORK.

There’s a “secret language” that people speak when they’re flirting successfully and it’s completely different from what’s socially accepted.

Hell, learning how to do flirting with women in a way means UNLEARNING everything you’ve been taught to believe by your parents and by society.

Why is getting women so different from “socializing” you say?

Because normal conversation and normal social behavior is based on logic, opinions, and social standards. Social standards like respecting other people’s opinions for example.

Attraction, however, is a FEELING based on EMOTIONS. Emotions are illogical, come from mostly subconscious needs and wants instead of conscious opinions… and they definitely do NOT follow social standards.

Let’s take a step back here, so you can really understand what learning how to do flirting is all about. Let’s talk about that subconscious stuff first…

Why are women attracted to you on a mostly subconscious level?

Because what they think and say they want (which are opinions based on logic) is not what they NEED (what makes them happy and satisfies their emotional needs).

Example of how to do flirting with a woman who grew up without a father:

She may SAY she wants a man who’s sweet, nice, funny, and all the usual suspects…

But what she NEEDS is a dominant, male authority figure because she grew up without one.

Every woman psychologically needs a male role model (= a father figure) when growing up that tells her what she can and cannot do. Someone who’s strict but cares a lot about her. If “that guy” was never there, then she subconsciously starts looking for him in the men she dates.

So learning how to do flirting with her would mean learning how to be dominant, because that’s what she needs the most: a dominant male who tells her what she can and can’t do.

Am I going too fast here? Don’t worry, because I’ll explain how to do flirting with your newly found knowledge in a step-by-step way below…

And YES, I will give you techniques you can use to start flirting successfully right after you’re done reading this blog post.

Onward…

How To Do Flirting: Forget About Social Standards!

Remember how I said that learning how to do flirting means you first have to realize that the dating game doesn’t follow social standards?

Okay, let’s explore the consequences of believing that’s NOT how to do flirting. That flirting is about doing what’s socially acceptable.

It’s socially not accepted to be rude. To treat someone disrespectfully, even if it’s only slightly disrespectful. Plus, you’re supposed to leave people’s dignity intact, which means no bashing on a stranger’s appearance or actions for you Mister! Sure, you can do all that stuff with friends but NOT with strangers.

The result: men who want to get women by doing their absolute best not to be rude, disrespectful, and to please the women as much as possible. Men who give compliments.

Men who chase women around when they’re playing hard to get because that’s what society teaches them: the men chase, the women choose. If a woman chooses you, you got “lucky.”

But guess what? When it comes to how to do flirting, how is THAT interesting for women?

It’s not a challenge…

It’s what every guy on the planet is doing…

It’s being easy to get…

Worst of all: following social standards?

It’s listening to what society THINKS is “the right thing to do,” but attraction is a feeling based on emotions and NOT on opinions remember!?

And here’s a question for you if you’re still not convinced that learning how to do flirting is unlearning social standards: if dating is about doing the right thing, then why does one woman after the other, after the other… after the other hook up with bad boys?

That’s right: because attraction isn’t a choice based on logic and/or opinions.

So frankly, screw what people (including women) think and say, because attraction is only about how something makes someone feel.

Here’s another juicy secret to convince you some more about the right way for how to do flirting:

It’s socially accepted to leave people’s dignity intact, so why then do women giggle, blush, and become attracted to you when you tease them with how they look or what they do? Why, then, are women attracted to you when you treat them like spoiled little brats just like you did in kindergarten?

The answer: it’s because attraction has nothing to do with social standards. Attraction is about creating emotions that women need and want (often without them knowing it).

Put simply, that means learning how to do flirting means learning which emotions women need and want.

Examples Of How To Do Flirting

Congratulations for getting this far! You’re only moments away from knowing everything you need to know for how to do flirting and get dates because of it…

I know it may sounded complicated when I said that flirting, so getting women, is about recognizing what they need/want while they don’t even know it themselves… but it’s actually not that hard.

Why?

Example of how to do flirting #1
Look around you next time you’re in a club or bar for example. What do you see? Women who don’t want to be there. Women who don’t look happy AT ALL.

Take a random club for example. If you pay close attention (do it next time alright?), then you’ll know how to do flirting because you see that most women didn’t come by themselves.

They came with friends… and there’s almost always one of them that got dragged to the club. One who actually doesn’t want to be there and who sits in the lounge area or in front of the bar all night. Her friends told her to come and she didn’t want to ruin the mood, but her own mood is crappy.

Guess what she needs? Someone to make her night right. Someone who stops her from feeling sorry for herself and who helps her have fun. Who helps her forget about her worries.

Knowing how to do flirting in this situation means walking up to her saying you can tell she’s not enjoying herself and that she doesn’t want to be there.

Continue by saying she’s there now anyways so why not make the most of it instead?

Then start teasing her, making small talk, dancing with her, having a couple drinks, and partying with her. Making sure she has the time of her life. That’s how you get her.

As you can see: knowing how to do flirting doesn’t mean you need to know a woman’s biography before you can do anything.

It can be as easy as giving her what she needs right here, right now.

Example of how to do flirting #2
In a society where Facebook, text messages, online games, and so on have almost completely taken over any REAL social interactions… people are disconnected.

Look around: how many people listen to their iPods or smartphone music, how many are calling or texting, and how many are having a conversation with a stranger?

I’m willing to bet you for $50 that only one in 100 people you see on the streets are having a fun conversation with a stranger, while the rest is completely living inside their own little bubble.

I can almost hear you think: “What does this have to do with learning how to do flirting?”

While it used to be common for men and women to talk face-to-face, they now talk online, via the phone or via text (if they talk at all and don’t walk past each other). Plus, most people have less and less class and don’t give a crap about others…

And the result is that you immediately stand out if you DO care about a total stranger you meet face-to-face. These days you stand out if you give someone a genuine compliment (instead of telling them they’re hot which is NOT a genuine compliment).

Why is it knowing how to do flirting when you would, say, help a single mom lift the baby carriage down a flight of stairs?

Because it’s catering to the age old psychological need discovered by Sigmund Freud: the need to feel important. Everyone wants to matter, to have a reason to exist.

These days everybody’s unimportant to everybody in our individualistic society, so making someone feel special, VERY important, immediately makes you interesting to them.

Now THAT is knowing how to do flirting! And don’t forget I already gave you two other examples of flirting:

One for women who grew up without a father figure (be dominant to get dates)… and one for women in general (tease them to attract them).

Want To Know More About How To Do Flirting?

I just know you’re going to LOVE this little “detail” about how to do flirting:

Not only are there many other situations than the ones I mentioned just now where you can “get the girl” just by paying attention, and by giving her what she needs…

There are certain personality traits women are attracted to that work in virtually ANY situation. And you know what?

I’ll tell you everything about them AND show you techniques for using them to get dates… FOR FREE… inside my Inner Game Newsletter.

I highly recommend you get the free members-only tips of my newsletter today, because they reveal many other overlooked secrets of how to do flirting besides those I already revealed.

That’s all I have to say about how to do flirting for today!

To More Dating Success,

Carlos Xuma
Win With Women

P.S. Looking for more tips on how to improve your confidence... or how to approach women, oh so beautiful women? And do you want tips for how to create attraction as well? Then get instant access to more tips by signing up for our FREE Inner Game Insider.

The post How To Do Flirting – A Men’s Guide To Getting Women appeared first on How To Win With Women.