This week, I’ve got you something from the mailbag…

QUESTION FROM A READER:

Carlos, I’ve been going out on a ton of dates lately, but I’ve run up against some obstacles.

I get into conversations with women, but I can’t seem to break into the “attraction zone” with many of the women. They all seem to keep me on this friendship level, and I don’t know what to do.

I want to get our conversations on a sexual level somehow…

What should I do?

• Pete W. – Manhattan, KS

______________________

CARLOS ANSWERS:

Pete, that’s a fantastic question that men everywhere want to know the answer to… in fact, it’s the key to kick-starting a woman’s attraction in that first conversation with her.

Will he be… “friend-zoned?

• The Text is what you’re saying to each other – the actual words you use.
• The Subtext is what you’re saying under your words, with your attitude and your way of being.

Inner Game = Outer Game

1) Tone of voice:  Lower your vocal pitch as low as you can go.

Find your “inner” Barry White…

2) Body posture & stance:  Slow everything down to half-speed…

3) Eye contact:  This is a huge one, because – as they say – the eyes are the windows to the soul.

The post How To Make A Conversation Sexual – 3 Tips appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Women are attracted to masculine men, no matter what the media tries to tell you.

You’re going to hear more and more nauseating, confusing and ridiculous information that tells you to “condemn the patriarchy” and embrace someone else’s ‘vision’ (agenda) for the future.

Go ahead and listen to them, and read them if you like, but keep your critical thinking hat on.

Don’t let them confuse you from the truth about what women want.

Is this what a REAL man looks like?

Women want one thing and one thing only, no matter how much everyone tries to believe the opposite:

Women want real MEN.

What’s a ‘real man,’ anyway? Isn’t that subjective?

Doesn’t that just change depending on who you ask?

No, not really.

Masculine – AKA ‘manly’ – traits are fairly consistent.

In my 16 years of doing this dating advice for men gig, one thing I’ve noticed is that feminists (and women with issues – often the same people) rarely (like almost NEVER) challenge me. They seem to sense right off the bat that I’m fully grounded in my identity as a man. I don’t buy into their fluffy white idealistic new-age nonsense.

And yet I see men everywhere challenged in their identities, words, and actions.

It’s a shame, because these are otherwise solid and well-meaning guys. But they lack the fortitude and conviction in themselves to transmit a vibe of MAN to the outside world.

Now, I’m not some knuckle-dragging Neanderthal. I’m not some one-dimensional idiot from a 1940’s movie.

Nor do I rage with testosterone 24/7.

I’m sophisticated and peaceful. And I know a thing or two about cultivating the attitude that women love. That’s why I wrote this little manifesto today for you.

In honor of the passing of R. Lee Ermey (the amazing drill instructor from “Full Metal Jacket“) – this is going to feel a bit like boot camp to you.

Suck it up, Buttercup…

So let’s dig in right now with the 3 Steps to becoming the man women desire…

Become The Alpha Man – Step 1: Grow A Pair, Soldier…!

I’m profoundly disturbed by the culture of waffling, weaseling, and sneakiness I see in men around me every day. I think this was cultivated from too many hours poring over their social media. Trying to make themselves not feel jealous of other people’s lives… and failing.

Posting images of what you ate last night?

Seriously?

Food porn?

I could not give shit-one about that. Anyone else that “likes” that image of your quail-egg soup is also not caring; they’re simply conditioned by the Facebook Illuminati to hammer away at that button whether or not they care. They’ve trained our brain’s reward system to “get off” on our phones.

Realize This: People don’t really “like” something if all they had to do was spend a microsecond hitting a blue button…

What they were doing was yelling “Hey! I’m here! I matter! Don’t forget about me!” into the void.

That’s what most people are doing out there. Hoping that – in this mindless chatter of internet idiocy, we don’t get forgotten. After all, we all deserve to be celebrities!

Right?

WRONG. 

REMEMBER: 90% of the things people post in social media are the fake, smiley propaganda of their lives. They’re just as desperate, unhappy, and unfulfilled as everyone else. They’re just trying to make up a better marketing campaign so that you might not see it.

Social media is a lie.

The truly successful aren’t on Facebook or Instagram posting their successes – they’re living them.

Get your balls back and start to reclaim your confidence and convictions.

Stop living your life in the virtual world.

Start by drawing yourself up a list of the virtues you stand for. I’ll bet not one man in a hundred has ever done this, but it’s essential to who you are. (I’ve attached my complete list of virtues at the end of this article. Use them as your reference.)

Women are attracted – almost unconditionally – to a man who knows what he stands for. It’s the reason that women don’t test or push me around. They know I’m solid and grounded.

And they should know the same about you, soldier.

Take action. Get busy.

You’ve got a good 50 to 60 more years in you, if you don’t eat junk food and get diabetes by 25 like most of the new crop these days.

Go ask that chick out… stop worrying about “the perfect words.” (The Perfect Words  are simply the ones you actually say instead of think.)

She’ll say yes BECAUSE YOU ASKED with conviction, not because you waited 10 years for just the right thing to say to avoid rejection.

Go stir some things up and make a mess. The world gets down on its knees and unzips your pants when you jump in the game instead of trying to watch from your iphone.

“Conflict is a forge for the steel of your willpower.” – Carlos Xuma

Be The Man Women Want – Step 2: Get Out Of The Cry Closet…!

You’re still here, Private? Good! You haven’t rung the bell and quit? Fantastic!

Now drop your hanky, and cut that weepy crap.

Too much indulgence in sadness make a man pathetic.

I’m about as kind, compassionate, and loving as you’re ever going to find in a guy – so don’t mistake this for macho posturing.

But these days everyone seems to need their weepy emotions aired to everyone else because we all think our emotions matter more than anything.

NEWS FLASH! Emotions are an energy source for men. Not your ‘cry closet.’

Emotions are not your place to sulk and ruminate. That’s for women.

Every guy came fresh from the factory with a hot little pepper of anger inside that he needs to tame and utilize for his power. Your anger is a nugget of plutonium

And also – drop that crying crap right now. It’s like this new revolution encouraging men to start acting pathetic. You can FEEL your sadness, son. But you CONTAIN those emotions. Throw boundaries around them – and then channel them over to your batteries.

Crying is surrender.

Crying is “I give up.”

That’s how you feel when you do it, if you think back to how it feels on the inside. It’s a complete resignation that comes from your core.

And that is something no man can entertain. And after a while this reaction becomes rehearsed, and starts to turn you into a weak, rubbery … well, girl.

Look – that’s not an insult to women. Women can handle their emotional highs and lows – they’re used to riding them. It’s part of a woman’s nature to deal with vacillating emotions.

“If civilization had been left in female hands we would still be living in grass huts…”
– Camille Paglia (renowned feminist)

But men use their emotions as fuel for forward progress. We are the action that supports their emotional insight.

Again, FEEL your emotions – but do not DWELL on them!

(By the way – cry closets are a real thing that some universities have implemented for the wuss students that can’t handle their own emotions. And you should be a little shocked by that…)

Be An Attractive Alpha Man – Step 3: Drop the Mic…!

Okay, you made it to Step 3, so I’m promoting you Private FIRST CLASS.

And you’re ready to hear the one thing that’s gonna make panties drop around the world for you…

You need to drop your mic…

Be the man she’s been waiting for…

Yup, show-stopping commitment to your convictions means you speak your mind and drop the microphone.

Walk off stage, and get to work.

There is no dress-rehearsal for life. You’re in the mix right now, grunt.

So make a DECISION. That’s really what I’m talking ’bout here.

Stop waffling and start committing yourself to a story of your own making. Don’t wait for other people to choose for you. Because as Rush said in “Free Will”:

“If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.”

Plant your flag and stand for what you believe in. This is the source of that “confidence” everybody tells you to have to attract girls.

They’re right – though it’s not the false confidence of a “pickup line.” It’s the real, dyed-in-the-wool feeling of being VALID.

Worthy.

Only YOU can give yourself that, son.

Stake your claim…

Just check in with reality (such that it is) from time to time to make sure you’re not off on another delusion that the world made up to distract you.

Make sure you read classic literature for being a man:

• The Prince – Nicolo Machiavelli
• 48 Laws Of Power – Robert Greene
• Call of the Wild – Jack London
• Fight Club – Chuck Palahniuk
• Walden – Henry David Thoreau
• The Art Of War – Sun Tzu
• Tao Te Ching – Lao Tzu (no relation to Sun.)

– or the writings of Seneca and Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations (which is free on the web.) These guys had masculinity all sewn up and tattooed on their souls over 2000 years ago.

Being a man is an opportunity and a PRIVILEGE! Though, you might not know it from the way people talk these days.

• Ignore the politically charged deluded people out there trying to bend reality to their weaknesses…
• Ignore the obviously misguided masses who only want attention to their plight – whatever it is. (Frankly if it’s not starvation, your whining is just getting on everyone’s nerves.)
• Ignore the people who really only want to grab their own power and control you…

It’s time to drop your mic right now.

Make a decision to start living your life instead of projecting it at other people. Your life isn’t a rumor or a publicity stunt. It’s comprised of the time you’ve got to make your mark, soldier.

It’s what separates the boys from the men – and it’s what makes women want them.

If you want to know more about the complete plan to be an Alpha Man, go here…

• Carlos X.

______________________

VIRTUES:

Wisdom

• Curiosity
• Love of learning
• Judgment
• Ingenuity
• Emotional intelligence
• Perspective

Courage

• Valor
• Perseverance
• Integrity

Humanity

• kindness
• Loving

Justice

• citizenship
• Fairness
• Leadership

Temperance

• Self control
• Prudence
• Humility

Transcendence

• Appreciation of beauty and excellence
• Gratitude
• Hope
• Spirituality
• Forgiveness
• Humour
• Zest

The post 3 Steps To Becoming The Man That Women Want appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Ah, women.

If you’re not completely captivated by the female species…you’re terrified of them. Strange how the possibility of getting turned down sends waves of fear even through the hardest of men.

Blame it on biological programming I guess. Back then, hitting on the wrong lady-folk literally meant death. If the woman you had your eye on happened to be tight with the big cheese in the village, he and his boys would treat you as a threat.

Cavemen had instinctive knowledge of how to attract women… sometimes

And well, let’s just say he’s not going to let you off with a verbal warning. (Unless your definition of a warning is “getting your head bashed in with the nearest blunt object.”)

These days, any blows dealt are the emotional and psychological kind.

The Curious Case of Brad the Doormat

My friend Brad is a 26-year-old programmer at a mobile app company who loves sci-fi films and plays a lot of video games.  He also has trouble talking to the ladies. He’s petrified by fear the moment the conversation starts.

I know what you’re thinking, so let me stop you right there…

Despite how Brad might seem at first, he’s quite a sociable guy. He enjoys meeting new people and making friends. He even had a pretty hot girlfriend not too long ago – and that’s actually where the problem started. Brad had been in a relationship with this girl for over a couple of years and things were going great.

That is, until she decided to cheat on him with some jock-looking dude who swept her off her feet. Brad was shattered to the core, as any guy would be in his shoes.

Don’t despair…

It’s not that the jerk that his girl ran off with was “better” than him.  It turned out they’d drifted apart for some time and her cheating was just the final nail in the coffin.

In any case, it really did a number on Brad. He’d built his life around their relationship, so he had a hard time starting over. It was especially difficult meeting new women, especially with starting a conversation with them.

Some part of Brad was afraid of messing up again, so he became a super needy, “yes man”version of himself. As a result, he’d crumble at the first sign of resistance.  Either that, or he’d end up going a few dates with someone until she’d gotten enough free dinners and gifts before kicking him to the curb.

Awakening Your Inner Alpha

It was at this point that I stepped in. After watching Brad walk out of one dating minefield and straight into another, I knew I had to rebuild him from the ground up. The fear of women giving you a hard time or rejecting you is a nothing more than psychological hang-up. And if you can’t find a way to get over this mental block around women, they’re going to walk all over you and eat you alive.

But it’s not because women have some grand diabolical scheme to persecute guys.

When a woman puts up an attitude, or seems she’s being vicious on purpose … the truth is that she’s putting you through a screening process for her own protection.

Whoah buddy…

She’s not about to just let any random schmuck in her pants, no matter how attracted she is to him. And the fact that she considers you as a “candidate” means that you already have a shot. Your job is to NOT mess it up by choking at a crucial moment.

Going back my “earlier days” example, women had to choose the right mate, or else they’d be screwed.  They needed a partner that could stand alongside them and brave the big bad world with her and their future offspring.

So if you react in a non-alpha way with your words, actions or behavior, her survival instincts will tell her to give you the boot.

So the real trick is not to shrivel up when a girl gives you crap after trying to hit on her. But it’s not a simple matter of telling yourself NOT to freak out when the moment comes. You need to make some changes on a deeper level to develop a backbone in the dating world.

So let’s get down to it…

Just Break the Damn Ice

Think of talking to women as bungee jumping: the longer you hesitate, the LESS you want to step off the edge.

The most common problem guys have with taking that leap is overthinking the what-ifs.

You might be telling yourself:

• – “What if she doesn’t like me?”
• – “What if she laughs in my face?”
• – “What if she acts like a total bitch and shoots me down in front of everyone?”
• – “What if we don’t gel and the conversation becomes super awkward?”

I can guarantee you ALL guys have gone through this to some degree. But clearly it hasn’t stopped SOME of them from picking up women and even getting laid.

So don’t stress out about how to get a conversation started.  Contrary to popular belief, there is no perfect pickup like or opener – in fact, it’s better that you DON’T have pre-packaged material.

Before I drop the mic…

There might have been a time when that artificial stuff worked, but thanks to the internet, women have caught on. They’re going to smell that stilted dialogue a mile away. Keep it organic instead and pick a topic to talk about.

It may be something as inane as the weather if you’re outside, or the weird way the oranges are stacked at the grocery aisle (seriously – that’s how I got a girl’s number before). Make a funny comment, offer your opinion or simply make an observation.

That last one works pretty well, especially if you say something like, “You strike me as someone who hates 80s covers” or an equally cheeky statement that elicits a response from her. You just need to find a topic as a springboard for other topics later on.

What matters is you don’t think about it too much and just get your foot in the door, so to speak. I’m aware you’re STILL worried about things going south, but we’ll deal with that later on.

Right now, try to remember that this whole talking and flirting deal is a GAME anyway, so you should treat it as such.

Controlling attraction is the answer…

Have a little faith in yourself that you can power through those typical snags guys hit when starting out.

Let’s go a little deeper and move on, shall we?

Be Funny

Easier said than done, I know. But there’s no way around this if you want to catch a girl’s attention.The good news is that it’s also not as hard as you think. I suggest you watch some videos of funny guys in movies and standup sets.

I’m not saying you have to be a Jim Carrey or Dave Chappelle clone – that would be sad and cringe-worthy. What I want you to do is to get a feel of the different styles out there, and how humor and comic timing work.

Observe how the greats point something out from a situation and exaggerate it to a ridiculous degree.

Going extreme can really amp up the attraction…

You’ll find a particular approach that resonates with you, and you should emulate (read: NOT imitate) that. No matter what style you have, you need to have ONE to begin with. Again, don’t worry if your brand of humor doesn’t click with a particular girl.

There are a hundred different reasons (most of which have nothing do to with you) why she didn’t laugh at your clever 90s Seinfeld reference.

She might be having a crap day, her pet plant died, her boss might have chewed her out just a couple of hours earlier, or she just might be a mean person. It doesn’t matter – It just means it wasn’t meant to be and your time is better spent on someone else.

Nothing personal.

And when you jokes DO click with a certain girl, the rest of conversation will take care of itself.

She’s there for you…

She is out there, and you just need to find someone who will “get it.” Like your opener, jokes are just a means to an end – which is getting her guard down and making a connection.

Side note: Try not to use humor that’s too dark or heavy. Comedians like Jimmy Carr are masters at this, but it’s definitely NOT for everyone. It takes a level of familiarity before unleashing this kind of stuff on someone. Save it for much later when you’re sure she won’t freak out – and use it sparingly even then.

Be Shameless

Ok, don’t get me wrong. Acting like a douche, making overtly sexual jokes and getting too handsy will earn you a well-deserved slap in the face.

But on the other side of the pickup spectrum, don’t be so damn apologetic about yourself either.

Look, I know she’s hot and all, but that doesn’t give her a license to judge or talk down to you. Nor does it mean you should waive your right to having an opinion – even if it doesn’t line up with hers.

The hottest couples I know RARELY agree on most things. What keeps them going is the RESPECT they have for their differences, and you need to establish that as early as now.

Which means you shouldn’t be afraid to be REAL with a girl. Again, you can do this without being an actual jerk about it.

Here are some examples:

• – If your passion is building model cars in your basement, don’t act like you have the plague. When she asks you about your hobbies, answer honestly with a smile and be HAPPY about it. How she reacts to it is up to HER, not you.
• – NEVER be sorry about anything if you haven’t crossed any lines (i.e. being creepy, getting too personal, using inappropriate language, etc.).
• – Here are some low-value statements that lower her respect and kill any attraction she has for you: “I’m sorry I’m not your type”, “I’m sorry I’m not a dog person, I hope that doesn’t turn you off”, “I’m sorry for talking to you, I didn’t mean to bother you.”
• – Be upfront about your intentions. You don’t have to spell it out exactly, but the way you present yourself and communicate with her should tell her what direction you want to take with her (i.e. NOT taking the “let’s just be friends” route).
• – Don’t be surprised that women ALSO hate it when a guy would rather hide his feelings of attraction instead of coming out with it. If your goal is to get a date with her, accept that the possibility of a “no” comes with the territory.

Be a (little) Smart-ass

This is the perfect antidote to spinelessness. You may think that you don’t have it in you, but you never know until you try pushing back a little.

Women are 100% more likely to respect you for holding your ground and keeping your dignity – even if you’re being treated like crap. For women with a sweeter disposition, putting yourself out there (even if you’re terrified!) and being a decent human being to them is more than ENOUGH.

(And mind you, I’m not talking about the entitled I’m-such-a-nice-guy-why-don’t-you-love-me kind of decent).

The fact that you’re making the first move, trying to be funny and basically putting in the work will already get you in their good graces.

She’s yours for the taking…

But some women are a little feisty and have more bite than bark.  And fewer still are full-blown bitchy.

Like I said, it doesn’t matter. In cases like those, your basic strategy is to keep your dignity and NEVER let her see you bleed – regardless of the outcome.

Attachment to outcome is what does a man in. The less you care about it, the more liberated you’ll be.  But it takes experience to get to that higher state of mind, so you better buckle up and rack up those miles.

Trust me – it’s a fun ride if you embrace the chaos.

Right now, you’re probably thinking, “Wow, thanks a bunch Carlos, you’ve cured me. All I have to do is tell myself not to be a wuss, and I’ll have the confidence of a Black Ops Marine.”

Chill, man. I got you covered.

Here are some tips to help you survive a particularly unpleasant encounter:

• – Don’t ever try to defend or justify yourself to her. This is a close cousin to not apologizing unnecessarily, and the point is not allowing her nasty words to have leverage over you.
• – When she says, “Nice Star Wars” shirt, I bet all the girls are begging you take them home,” don’t act all hurt and try to “correct” her. You LOSE if you snap back with, “Excuse me, Star Wars happens to be one of the greatest sci-fi stories of all time and anyone who’s cultured will have some appreciation of it.”  
• – Stay in the game. It’s all about returning her serve, so lob that zinger right back and put the ball in her court. The best way to handle that Star Wars remark is by taking it to a ridiculous level: “Yeah, I’m the galaxy’s biggest stud, no doubt.”
• – Turn the tables on her by taking it further. Now, she might try to keep you on your toes with another condescending quip like, “Sorry, I don’t find sci-fi geeks attractive at all”, so you just recalibrate that reality with a statement of your own. “Well, don’t diss it ‘til you’ve tried it. Besides, millions of Big Bang Theory fans don’t have a problem with sexy geeks.”
• – She might take a jab at your appearance like your thinning hairline or bulging mid-section, to which you say respectively, “Yeah, balding is awesome – who needs all that wind resistance anyway?” and “What’s wrong with having more of me to love?”
• – Stay the course. Once you’ve gone down this path, don’t back down now. Keep up the verbal wordplay even if she ends up leaving. Finish the game strong and let it be a character-building moment.

Speaking of which…

Lose Graciously

So maybe it’s really not working out and she simply refuses to be won over.  It’s no big deal. No one will fault you for employing a dignified exit strategy.

You can lick your wounds when you get home. In the meantime, just finish things off with “Thanks for your time anyway, it was nice talking to you” and remove yourself from the situation.

Unloading your frustration on her will make a less-than-ideal scenario into a legitimately BAD one.

It helps to think of it this way:

Your goal isn’t to find The One Girl Destined For You.

You’re just here for the ride, so enjoy it.  If you do get a serious relationship out of it, that’s not worth thinking about until MUCH later on.

You can play coy, my dear…

Your immediate priority is getting your inner game sorted out and not being a doormat to women. 

And that takes us to the last part…

Rock-Solid Confidence Is a MUST

Obviously, I can’t hope to cover this entire topic right here and now. But this is important stuff because having a spine means believing in yourself.

If you felt you were lacking or defective in some way, this is 100% going to mess with your game.  You can “fake it til you make it” all you want, but the “making it” part is about developing good old-fashioned self-confidence.

That doesn’t mean though you have to hold off on interacting with women while you work on this part of yourself.

Yeah, that’s one thumbs up buddy

You can still build up that in-field experience while learning about the basics of being more confident.

Here are some basics to help you get started:

• – Think about the positives. Make a simple list of the stuff you’re naturally good at, and any interests and hobbies that make you, YOU. Also include stuff you’ve done in the past that a made a difference or impacted people positively. Having pride in who you are is a good start and a basic building block of confidence.
• – Deal with your hang–ups. I’m not trying to be your shrink or anything, but I want you to think about experiences growing up that might have shaped that narrative you have about yourself. People like your family, friends, classmates, ex-partners (like in Brad’s case) have an effect on your confidence and it’s important to acknowledge this.
• – Put an action plan down in writing. Maybe there’s a particular area in your life you’re not feeling great about, so come up with a list actionable items to help you work on it.Whether it’s being better at sports, playing music or being the world’s best hotdog eater, create a path to follow with milestones along the way (kidding about the last one of course). The more you check off these items off the list, the greater your confidence will grow.
• – Don’t be a slob. It’s sad to see a lot of guys not feeling 100% about themselves because of something they could totally prevent. You don’t have to look like Brad Pitt or George Clooney, but there’s no excuse for being out of shape and poor hygiene. That, and eating healthy (or at least trying to) are totally under your control.
• – Handle the Essentials. Even the basics like taking a shower, smelling good, brushing your teeth and having a sense of style will give you serious boost before you leave your place. Confidence is NOT worrying about these things when you’re dealing with other people – women included.
• – Get your Z’s. And while we’re on the topic of health, get your sleep life in order – your waking hours depend on it. Look up how to keep your circadian rhythm in harmony. The better you rest, the more stuff you get done in the day!

Hey, I know all of this is a lot to take in, but trust me that this will put you on the right path to unleashing the Awesome Alpha Dude in you.

When you cultivate a solid personality that comes from a place of fearless authenticity, women will sense that and respect you.

This could be your lap, man

Now, I also happen to have a FREE CD that will help you along your journey. It’s a great guide that takes everything we’ve just talked about now, and ACCELERATE your progress like crazy!

It’s my gift to you that’ll help you create an unshakable masculine core that will have women fighting over you.

Forget about grovelling to win their approval – this will flip the script by blasting away any trace of insecurity in your system!

Check it out NOW – CLICK HERE

The post How to Attract Women (by Growing Your Spine) appeared first on How To Win With Women.

You can’t expect to lure a woman into your bed with your Magic: The Gathering card collection, or your life size Bruce Lee figure.

Too weird, dude.

(Though, I did hook up with a long term girlfriend by showing off my $150 Lamborghini Countach model… that’s a story for another time.)

The big problem is that most guys don’t know what REALLY gets women hot for a guy. If you ask a man, you’ll get either a man’s programmed response: “Money! Big wanker! Nice Car!”

Or you’ll get a woman’s programmed response: “Be funny! Be Confident! Be sensitive!”

Now, some of those are right. but not as much as you might think. In fact, the real answer is much more frustrating for a guy to hear…

But let’s clear out the “elephant” in the room right now… do you need to be rich to attract women?

Being wealthy indicates power, security, comfort and even a certain amount of exciting energy. This is very attractive to women who crave all these feelings.

After all, there are PLENTY of women dating poor guys.

And that’s really what women want. It’s not the money itself.

It’s the FEELINGS the man makes her experience when she’s around him.

Everything you do, everything you say, everything you communicate with your lifestyle will create a feeling in a women.

So the fastest way to get her attracted to you is to give her the FEELINGS she desires.

Let’s jump right in, and I’ll give you 5 qualities that makes women attracted to men.

(And I’m promising you right now that it’s not about the shampoo or shower gel you’re using…)

Here we go with:

#5 quality to attract a girl is: Speaking to her true self.

If you can get past her defenses and the walls she puts up around herself, you can truly speak to the real person inside of her.

You’ll be one of the few men in her world that understands her. This makes you very significant to her, and will make you attractive like no other.

You see, most women talk about almost anything and everything.

The part that most men don’t know about is that women don’t have a very strong sense of self. They’re more fluid with their self-perception than man are.

Chances are, SHE doesn’t even know who she is in her heart of hearts.

So when you’re able to talk to her and perceptively tell her what you see in her, she will listen to you as if you’re speaking the gospel.

Tell her what you see in her personality. If you spot something worth noting (and hopefully you do, otherwise – why are you talking to her?) point it out.

95% of guys have no idea this works, much less how to do it, so make sure you put that bullet in the chamber.

#4 trait that attracts women to men is: Conviction.

No, I’m not talking about doing 10-to-15 years for bank robbery…

I’m talking about how much conviction you have in yourself.

Your life. Your beliefs.

What this one boils down to is how unshakeable are you? How content and happy are you in your own skin?

The easiest way to do this is to simply start forming opinions about stuff. Not pig-headed and dumb, but just have an opinion worth talking about.

Things like politics are good, but also more philosophical ones as well.

This is the essence of the “Power Question” technique I teach in my programs. You can ask questions that will not only make her think, but also tell her that you’ve got your own beliefs and stand on things.

A woman instinctively knows that a man who doesn’t take a stand is not of strong enough character to protect her.

Another way a man has conviction is that he knows what he wants in life. He’s decisive.

This is the real essence of “confidence” that you hear everyone talking about. You can’t just “get confident” – but you can easily start being more convinced of things in your life, can’t you?

Anything is fair game to have an opinion on.

– Best pizza

– Worst time to surf Facebook

– Favorite TV show

– Best place for late evening dessert

Start stocking up on your opinions and convictions. What’s important to you?

What do you believe in?

If you’re not sure, now’s the time to find out.

#3 trait that women dig: Skill.

What kind of skill?

Any kind of skill is attractive to a girl. For example:

– Playing a musical instrument

– Racing cars or motorcycles

– Being a good cook or chef

– Being extremely good with computers

And especially if that skill demonstrates the following things:

– It took you some time to acquire it. This says that you have the self-discipline to work for something.

– It challenged you. This says that you have the belief in yourself to keep going after the goal.

– It was voluntary. Meaning that you had to make the choice to acquire this skill. Which shows that you are not a quitter.

These are all examples of masculine qualities that girls find attractive.

When a woman looks to a man to protect her and keep her safe, the same qualities that you used to acquire that skill are the same ones she knows will serve her in the relationship.

Yeah, it’s a little bit selfish, but women survive by being cautious with their safety.

Related to this quality is the next one on our list…

#2 characteristic that makes a man attractive is: Dominance and strength.

This doesn’t mean that you’re a bully or a brute, nor does it mean that you have to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger (in his prime.)

Dominance simply means that you DOMINATE. As in, you have achieved authority, mastery, or command over something.

Hell, it could be dominating in checkers, as long as you do it well.

Girls are – by nature – submissive. Men are naturally more dominant and authoritative.

Not to be sexist in any way, but it makes the world work better. This is the natural order of things.

There are a ton of ways to demonstrate your dominance:

– Physical fitness – which is not to say incredibly ripped abs, or 48″ biceps. Just be FIT – which means trading in an hour of television regularly to get some exercise. Just being trim and in shape will instantly communicate dominance to her.

– Leadership ability – Aspiring to manage people is a great way to cultivate the attraction quality that women can’t resist. Fact is, girls sleep with their bosses not because they were pressured to; she did it because she gets hot for men in authority positions. Pretty much every woman does.

– Being good with kids and animals – Yeah, you read that right, being good with kids (even if you two never have any) and fuzzy little critters is something that almost NO GIRL can resist.

– Be DRIVEN and ambitious – This shows that you’ve got the aggressive motivation that she can count on – especially if it came down to survival. Are you a survivor? You should know that before you walk out the door every day.

And finally, the top of the qualities…

#1 Quality that attracts girls to guys is: Social value

This one is a catch-all that encompasses many others. You don’t have to have them all, and that’s the beauty of it.

You can pick and choose like it’s a buffet. She only needs to see some of them from time to time to know that you have social value.

What is Social Value?

It’s how much you’re valued by your friends, family, and people you work with. If you command respect from them, you have social value.

Here are just a few of the ways that social value is demonstrated:

– Fun: Are you a fun person to hang out with? Do you have a positive attitude and aura about you? Being a “Donnie Darko” isn’t going to be attractive, no matter how much you try to justify that mindset.

– Generosity: Are you a giver or a taker? Do you have the spiritual openness to be un-selfish when you can?

If you’re a giver, this tells a girl that you’ve got the relaxed attitude of a man with resources. With abundance, instead of scarcity.

If you’re a taker, you’re not going to be generous to her with what she needs, which is emotional support, love, and a certain amount of adoration.

– RELAXED: This shows that you’ve got a light approach to life. You’re not uptight. Guys who are structured and tense are typically this way because they don’t feel secure about their ability to handle life. Which also tells a woman that she’s with a guy who might not be a good pick when it comes to betting her genetic legacy.

Guys who have an angry, defensive air about them are NOT socially valued. In fact, they’re avoided.

Social value may sound pretty serious when I put it into these terms, but it’s important for you to understand how powerful it is when it comes to your life.

Guys with the ability to communicate social value are the most successful, the happiest, the wealthiest, and the most secure.

In study after study, these guys also live the longest, and typically get laid WAY more than other men. It comes down to your level of SEXUAL POWER as a man.

And that alone should motivate you to focusing on these qualities that make you more attractive to girls.

It’s that solid foundation of rock solid masculinity that women CRAVE, and I’ve put together a program to help you with that. It’s called Alpha Sexual Power – this course teaches you how to harness your inner qualities as a man and AMPLIFY them tenfold.

Click HERE to get started with this TODAY.

The post What Attracts Women – 5 Qualities Every Man Needs appeared first on How To Win With Women.

If you suspect your own body is betraying you, how confident can you feel?

That’s why you need to know the secrets to decipher body language and know what signals are good – and which ones will mislead you.

Most of the people that I coach on body language are mostly interested in flirting signals of the opposite sex. Most body language signals and clues are fairly obvious if you spend any time observing people.

However, the more subtle indications of interest and attraction can be missed, so we’ll go through a few of the most important body language signals you can read.

What’s her body telling you? Body Language Signal 1: Emphasis

Men and women emphasize different aspects with body language.

Men try to appear taller, usually by sucking in their gut, and straightening up their spine.

Guys also try to puff up their chests. In general, guys try to highlight their muscles and stature.

On the other side, women emphasize their cleavage as much as possible.

Her chest is also a large part of her sexual attraction to men, so that’s why women work so hard to appear busty.

Everything from padded bras to fake boobs are fair game.

Women also try to draw attention to their hair, which is another primal indicator of femininity. They usually will touch their hair – finger-combing it – as well as touching and straightening it out.

She’ll also flip her hair over her shoulder to get attention. This move also serves to emphasize her face and profile – as well as her neck.

Women will frequently expose their neck – a primal demonstration of vulnerability – and she will cross her legs to emphasize her hips.

Not many guys realize that hips are a primal mating trigger that indicates a woman’s fertility.

What are her eyes saying to you? Body Language Sign 2: Read her gaze.

There’s a very predictable pattern when a girls makes eye contact with a guy she likes.

First, she makes eye contact with him – directly. Usually this lasts no longer than a second or so, but just long enough that he should know she was looking right at him.

Then, after he engages in conversation, she will go through a coy dance of eye contact. She will match his gaze, look from eye to eye, then at his lips, then looking down and away from him.

The only risk here is that men are often going to misinterpret this situation in one of two ways:

– He misreads her smile and gaze as being flirtatious, instead of friendly. Hey, we’re guys – we want to believe that sex is a motivator, right?

– He misreads her smile and gaze as being friendly when it was really flirtatious. Let’s face it, most women don’t understand how thick some guys are. And many women try and be too subtle with their signals.

The Other Parts Of Her Sexual Display – Body Language Signal 3: Watch her body.

Related to the neck are other areas of vulnerability – and emphasis – that you should watch for.

There are areas of physical vulnerability that a girl will expose, such as her neck (which I’ve already mentioned), her wrists, and throat. Any of these areas could be used against a person, so we tend to protect those zones.

The wrist flash is a big in indication of interest.

You should also watch out for her putting her hand behind her hair on the back of her neck. This is her way of stimulating a very erotic zone.

You may have heard that girls like to have their hair pulled – and especially during sex.

So what she does is manually stimulates the parts of her body that are “calling out” during your conversation.

Just keep in mind that you’ve really got to get her heavily aroused during conversation to get her to do this.

Still, it’s a valuable body language signal to watch out for.

The Big Hit – Body language attraction signal 4: Watch out for her love-taps.

At a minimum, when a woman touches you in ANY way, it indicates she’s at least comfortable with you. You can’t be sure she’s actually sexually interested in you until she gives you what I call a “love tap.”

A woman will playfully hit you on the arm in some way when she’s feeling the challenge of attraction.

This is a good sign, especially if you’re teasing her, she hits you, and then says, “Stop!” in a playful way.

Another key here is to simply compare the amount of “touch time” she gives to you versus other men in the group. If you’re getting at least the same, you’re doing good. If you’re getting more, you’re doing better.

Remember – when a woman is feeling frustrated, she will act out physically.

And make no mistake: Frustration is a GOOD thing to make her feel.

Otherwise, you’ll wind up with neutral energy.

What about giving off the right body language?

This is just as important as reading her body language – and gives you twice the power that other people have who aren’t aware of how seductive body language works.

You have to know how to demonstrate confident, sexually dominant body language to women as well.

If you rely on your words alone, you’re going to lose a lot of the ability to attract a girl. Most guys make this mistake when they use pickup lines and other routines that just don’t work for them.

It’s not that the words don’t work – it’s that you need an attitude that matches the words. And 90% of your attitude is in your body language and vocal tone.

Let me share some tips on how to radiate confident body language to her, and how to guarantee a positive response.

Confident Body Language Signal: Touching her

This one is tricky because most guys don’t have a refined sense of how to touch a woman correctly. They tend towards over touching, which comes across as groping and fondling.

This happens mostly because guys are drawn to the images of women we see, and we get more and more rabid about feeling what we’re seeing.

Women are more touchy/feely by nature, and therefore tend to get a lot more of their physical needs met.

Men suppress their needs for physical contact, and as a result we go into starvation mode.

One way you can avoid this problem is by getting regular massages. I prefer Thai massages because they really go deep and leave me feeling wonderfully depleted and relaxed after it’s over.

Oh, and I usually have them done by cute Thai girls…but that’s just icing on the cake.

Another confident Body Language Signal: Fidgetation.

When a girl gets sexually flustered, or if she starts to feel attraction and has nowhere to put that eager energy, she will start to fidget. She has to act out the energy, and she’ll start to self-soothe.

Some of the signs are:

– Twirling her hair

– Playing with her drink or straw

– Playing with her bracelets or jewelry

Now, this fidgeting is usually accompanied by a smiling, cheery attitude. If she’s doing this kind of fidgeting, but you get a distinct pissy vibe, she could just be sick of the conversation.

So you need to be able to pick up on her aura of interest.

Squirming and fidgeting is good in a woman, but bad in a guy.

If you’re doing this, STOP. It’s unattractive.

You should have a very calm, smooth way of moving when you’re around a girl.

This includes:

– No fast motions – or jerky, spastic movements

– No darting eyes. Keep them soft and constant.

– No talking like you’re on crystal meth. Slow down.

– Keep your back straight

And the last Body language indication you should broadcast is: Stay Open!

Most guys don’t keep their body language open when they’re talking to girls. They fold their arms in front of their chest, or they hold up a drink between him and her.

This is a subconscious barrier that projects a defensive posture.

Guess what? You don’t need it.

One of the best things you can do to practice confident body language is to practice NOT putting your hands anywhere. Just let them hang at your sides.

Try it now. Just stand up, and let your hands hang down naturally.

I’ll bet you get a wave of: “This feels weird…”

That’s okay, keep them where they are. Fight the urge to let your arms cross, or stick your hands in your pockets, or clasp them in front or behind you.

You’ll get used to it. It’s only your body telling you (falsely) that you’re unprotected.

But it’s a great posture of security and self-confidence to NOT have to put your hands or arms somewhere.

As you can see, projecting confident body language is a priority for you. And it will help for you to be able to read her body language as well.

The combination of BOTH these skills is deadly when it comes to attracting girls.

If you want to create attraction with women, you’ll need to develop a good control of your body language.

This tells women you’ve got your act together and you’re in control of your life. That’s the kind of Alpha Male energy they crave – it’s like Chick Crack that women can’t get enough of.

Now you’re armed and dangerous…

And if you want even more tips on how to be a badass with your body language, I’ve got something you’ll definitely want to see:

http://www.carlosxuma.com/body-language/understand-body-language.php

The post 6 Body Language Confidence Signals – How To Create Attraction With Girls appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Most guys aren’t aware that once they’ve committed certain attraction-killing mistakes, a woman will NEVER see them in any sexual light whatsoever…

…no matter hard they try to CONVINCE them otherwise.

And you’ve probably made these same mistakes before and didn’t even know it.

So as you told yourself things will be different “this time”, you kept getting mediocre results over and over again.

I feel your frustration, and I’ve been there myself. And I’ll share a little truth I’ve learned from hard experience.

It’s a profound realization I’ve had which has helped me date some of the hottest, high-quality women that’ll make your jaw drop.

The cold, hard fact is that these attraction killers fly over most men’s heads, making them totally oblivious to why women LOVE shooting them down.

The good news is that I’ve figured out what they are…

…and once you’ve learned to AVOID these mistakes, you’ll finally climb out of that dateless hole – starting TODAY.

I can help you make that happen, but first I need you to understand another truth about women.

You see, attraction is NEVER an active choice that they make. It’s either a woman feels that bone-deep, primal lust for you – or NOTHING at all.

You’ll know you’ve fallen into the latter category when she uses these lines on you:

“I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”

“You’re really cute…you remind me of my brother.”

“My boyfriend likes that band too!”

“Thanks for the drink, I need to go back to my friends now.”

“Get lost.”

What that means is that you need to get around her LOGICAL defenses in order to make her like you. There’s NO WAY she’s going to tell you, “Well, based on everything you’ve told me, I’d say sleeping with you is the right choice!”

Remember, women don’t operate on conscious reasoning when they decide to have sex with a guy.

There’s only ONE way to make a woman feel that uncontrollable urge to rip your clothes off and throw you on her bed…

You need to reach a subliminal trigger deep in her mind BEFORE she’ll even consider you as boyfriend material.

Once you’ve flipped this LUST SWITCH in her brain, only then can you get around that wall she’s put up.

It’s that same wall that countless men have run into headfirst, again and again. But starting TODAY, you don’t have to be like those other guys.

The women you’ve dreamed of dating are just waiting for you to knock down that floodgate of desire within them.

And I’ll show you how to do it step by step, thanks to a system I’ve spent YEARS working on. It’s a completely mapped out method that will help you find that tripwire in every woman’s head.

This is the same trigger that guarantees an explosive response from women, every time. It’s all about learning a SECRET combination of words, hidden in plain sight.

Yet, when you use these seemingly innocent words, you’ll instantly turn the tables on women and have THEM begging you for your time and attention!

I’ve already helped thousands of other guys get the woman of their dreams, and I want to do the same for you.

Unlearn all the BAD stuff you’ve picked up over the years and enjoy REAL success with women starting NOW.

Click HERE to get started with the Lust Response System. Your only regret will be that you didn’t make this game-changing decision sooner.

The post Why Guys Keep Getting ZERO Results – Are You One of Them? appeared first on How To Win With Women.

..and sleeping with someone you’re TOTALLY INTO?

Plenty, and the latter is what you should aim for.

That’s because people who have sex but are merely attracted to each other won’t want anything else after the fact.

In other words, there’s NO REAL connection present and that means you’re going to be awkward around each other outside the bedroom.

And that’s not what I want for you.

To really make a girl crave you inside out (and not just certain parts of your anatomy), you’ll need to create that genuine SPARK that’ll make her come back for more.

But how can you trigger this insatiable desire that’s inside every woman?

First, it needs to be done right off the bat. You need to plant those mental seeds within minutes of first meeting her; getting that leverage is your number one priority.

Attraction Mistakes 101

A lot of men mess up this crucial part because they have NO IDEA what to say to a woman to turn her on.

For instance, some guys think that it’s enough to relate to her on some level, like talking at length about something that they both like.

It’s nice to connect this way (anything’s better than getting rejected, right?), but focusing on this stuff isn’t going to cut the mustard in the world of dating.

(Maybe it’s enough if you wanted to be just friends…but that’s not why you’re reading this, right?)

All it does is create a portal into that platonic friend zone that all guys dread. If you keep on this let’s-be-harmless-friends path, that’s all you’ll get.

If you don’t take it up a notch after figuring out your similarities, she’ll see you as one of those guy friends she wants to have around, but NEVER sleep with.

Avoiding the Friend Zone

If you want to avoid getting pigeonholed into that safe, harmless category reserved for Average Frustrated Chumps, you’ll need to project a masculine presence.

It’s basic science: opposites attract, so your manly qualities will always appeal to her feminine side.

So how do you do that?

Article continues – CLICK HERE for next page

The post Explosive strategies to make her desperately desire you appeared first on How To Win With Women.

For instance, most perceived limitations come in what I call the “visual variety.” All that stuff we’re told that we should have to be physically attractive to another person, like your musculature, your facial features, or even your hairline.

The one thing that most guys don’t realize is that we men believe that just because WE find women attractive (or not) based solely on appearance, that women are doing the same to us. The fact is that while we should maximize our *image* as much as possible, women are more attracted to our level of confidence and “dominance” when it comes to sexual attraction.

In many ways, this gives men the unfair advantage over women, since their genetics stamped them very early in life. For men, we can actually mold our sexual appeal by our behavior, which is what I’ve been teaching men how to do for over a decade now.

Think of Jack Nicholson. He’s widely regarded as hollywood’s most notorious womaniser. He’s slept with just about every women he’s come in contact with, and yet he’s not a very handsome guy – even by his own estimation.

Look around every corner and you’ll see examples of guys with women where you say to yourself, “WTF??” And this is more the rule than the exception.

Here’s how you handle your perceived shortfalls. Stop recognizing them and focusing on them. In fact, come up with a funny, self-deprecating remark to show women that you know your limitations, but you’re not limited by them.

“I realized last year that since my hair was thinning a bit, I will never start trying to cover it up. You know those guys with comb-overs? They’re the guys that think if you crush a bag of potato chips, now you’ve got more chips. No way…” (Chuckle.)

Women will focus on the insecurity that bothers you the most – because you’re probably focused on it too. Drop that routine and get back to promoting your strengths instead.

Just ask yourself: WWJND – What would Jack Nicholson do?

If you want to attract women on a VERY deep and primal level, check this out

Stay Alpha…

– Carlos Xuma

The post Do you have “limitations”? appeared first on How To Win With Women.

But, there’s a part of you that’s confused.

You might wonder if this is really love. After everything that had happened to you, now you’re unsure, maybe even a little pessimistic.

How would you know if you’re really in love wit her?

Read this article, it has some good insights. And at the end, you’ll be thinking “Oh, THAT’s how I’ll know”.

Stay Alpha,

– Carlos Xuma

—

Title: How do I know I’m in love?

When people ask me, I always answer with a question, one that I learned from an old man. There is always an answer.

Eleven years ago, I was in the last throes of despair with my ex-wife. I didn’t much like her, nor she me. Within a year, we would be divorced. She was the kind who slept in another room — sometimes another room in a nearby city. Me, I gleefully flew off to Scotland on a moment’s notice. It was like that. We tolerated one another, and no more.

In matters of love, tolerance is a waste of time, the fire-suppression system for passion. We’re talking about the person here, not their annoying quirks — it is incumbent upon you to accept the quirks of a loved one. If you can’t love a person’s type-A tendencies, her habitual misspellings, her inability to tell north from south, then you are on the slippery slope toward tolerating one another. And if you only tolerate, then…

Click here to go ahead and read the rest of the article at Esquire.com

The post How do I know I’m in love? appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Take a look at the article below. It has some really good stuff that will expand your awareness of “qualification” and pursuit in dating. This is stuff that is usually overlooked in the mainstream “feminized” media, so read it before some crazy special interest group gets it removed or something.

The post Top Ten Ways to Challenge Women to be Attracted to You appeared first on How To Win With Women.

No matter what type of guy you are…even if you are not the best looking, the richest, even the hottest…all you need to know is this….

You have to build an EMOTIONAL CONNECTION with her!

You see women live on a very emotional level. We guys rarely shows our feelings, but for women – this is the way she feels ALIVE.  Understand that any guy who’s able to connect with her on that emotional level is the one who’s most likely she will relate to.

It doesn’t mean you have to FEEL all those same emotions, but you have to be able to relate to them.

When you can do this…

YOU will be the guy she answers right away when you call, the one who she says YES to when you ask for a date, and the ONLY MAN she admires and really respects.

So, how to build an emotional connection with her?

Here are the 3 MOST IMPORTANT STEPS…

How to build a REAL connection – Step 1: Let her talk

Women love to talk. When you see a woman you like, let her do most of the talking. Remember this: She will feel MOST connected to you when she feels you know her. And by letting her talk, you’ll get more details of who she is.

How to get her to talk? Start with simple question then dig deeper…

Let’s say you ask her where she works. Probe further…find out what made her choose that job. Does she like it or not? If not, why? If yes, which part of her job she loves the most?

Just dig deeper. Probe. Learn more about her.

Read the rest of the article HERE…

The post How to REALLY connect with women… appeared first on How To Win With Women.

>>> Swinggcat:

Thanks ***** it’s a pleasure to be here too, dude And yeap, I’d like to talk about a particular “temptation” today…

Specificially… “Temptation Without Satisfaction”

The word ‘tantalize’ is a close cousin to ‘flirting’ and means temptation without satisfaction.

‘Tantalize’ comes from the Greek Tantalus whom Zeus condemned for eternity to stand in a pool of water beneath a fruit tree.

Whenever he reached for fruit, the branches rose, preventing him from satisfying his appetite. Whenever he bent down to drink, the water receded, thwarting him from quenching his thirst. Each failed attempt at attaining fruit or water increased his
desire.

The story of Tantalus resonated with the ancient Greeks because it revealed something endemic to human beings: temptation without satisfaction rouses desire in all of us.

To demonstrate this, I want you to try a little experiment: Lightly brush your fingers against your arm for a split second. I’m willing to bet you felt a slight urge to itch your arm.

Here’s an example of how you can use temptation without satisfaction to stir up sexual arousal in women… When it’s time kiss a girl, instead of going for the gold and thrusting your tongue down her throat, graze your lips against hers for a few seconds. Then pull back and give her a knowing smile.

She’ll return your smile with the same pouty face children make when their parents refuse to buy them the toy they’ve been drooling over for months.

Do this to her a few more times and she will grab you tightly and kiss you hard. Is it cruel and unusual punishment to torture a poor damsel in distress like this?

No no. Far from it.

This is flirting at its finest and the kind of torture women love. That’s because temptation without satisfaction puts their sexual desire on steroids.

Moreover, it demonstrates to women that you know what you’re doing in the bedroom. Masterful lovers use temptation without satisfaction from the moment they meet a woman ‘til sex (and during) to stoke the sexual fire in her loins and precipitate orgasm.

If you want to master the ins-and-outs of creating temptation without satisfaction, giving you the power to whet a woman’s appetite FAST, just download this:

DOWNLOAD IT HERE

… On “Creating Obstacles”

When you put up a barrier between a woman and something she wants, her desire for it increases a hundredfold. When done in a flirtatious context it “sexualizes” her desire.

To give you an example, a while back I chatted up this 22-year-old brunette. She was obviously into me: each joke I made – even the ones that should make only retarded children laugh – hurled her into a paroxysm of giggles and compelled her to fondle me like a crystal ball.

So I told her, “The Aquarium of the Pacific has a new sea otter exhibit and I’m going next week.” (Later I learned that BP funded the exhibit. But that’s a story for another time.)

She exclaimed, “I love sea otters,” and then begged, “I wanna go. I wanna go. Take me. Take me. Please!!” I teased, “I was gonna take you but you had to act all needy about going. So that’s just not happening anymore.”

She socked me on the arm and whined, “That’s no fair. You’re such a meany. I wanna go so bad.”

Let’s break down what I did…

Continued HERE…

The post Temptation Without Satisfaction…? appeared first on How To Win With Women.

You don’t have to become someone else or pretend to be a clone of me either… a guy who wears a Carlos Xuma mask all his life. That’s fake and I don’t want you to do that.

Creating attraction with your character traits doesn’t have to be like that at all though because it doesn’t require you to become someone else, it asks you to use the tools that were given to you at birth.

Enter genetics. Believe it or not, but you’re trying to learn how to get with a girl thanks to your genetics…

Why?

Let’s take a look at meeting and dating a woman from a purely biological perspective: say the male sex wouldn’t get the things that allow us to create attraction at birth, what would that mean? It would mean that we wouldn’t be able to get a mate to mate with and our species would slowly become extinct.

And when you really think about it, you are the result of your father that knew how to create attraction, your father is the result of your grandfather… and they all used the God given tools they received at birth. But that’s the problem these days: people are totally disconnected from their (biological) nature because of all the technology and civilization around us that we forgot the talents we have from birth onwards.

In a moment you’ll find out exactly WHY certain character traits create attraction genetically speaking, so remember when you continue to read that these traits are present in all men to some extent since birth, therefore I do not want you to change but to finally start using what nature gave you!

How To Create Attraction By Being Dominant

The funny thing about dominance is that some men are naturally dominant but don’t know that it works really well with women… I was one of ’em once.

But WHY does it create attraction? It has to do with human evolution my friend.

Here’s the story:

We didn’t always live in cities, in fact, most of our history consists of us living in small tribes on the plains of Africa and Asia… tribes of a couple dozen people at best.

And when a male of a tribe was more dominant than other males, he would be able to gather more resources (food, shelter, clothing, etc.) whenever he wanted by taking it with force or exercising his influence.

That meant that because he had access to more resources, his genes had a better chance of survival than that of any another male and that if a female would mate with him… SHE and her offspring would also have higher chances of survival.

The result was that after thousands of years women started sexually selecting dominance as a character trait, because the more dominant a male was the better her genes would survive and the more offspring she would be able to support.

So from a survival of the fittest perspective, the character trait of being dominant has been a fitness indicator for a loooooong time.

Conclusion: if you want to create attraction, then be more dominant. 

An example of getting a woman’s phone number…

Instead of ASKING her “may I have your phone number?” which is not dominant at all and just plain stupid because the chance she says no is 50%, it’s easy to say no…

You TELL her “let’s exchange phone numbers, so we can talk more tomorrow” or the even more dominant “give me your phone number, so we can talk more tomorrow.”

I know from experience, and genetics, which one gives me more success with women…

Do you know now too?

P.S. What you\'ve learned today is only the tip of the iceberg of what most men will never know about women and dating. And if you want to know more about how to meet women without much effort, then I highly recommend you get our FREE Inner Game Newsletter right away. Click here now to get more free tricks, tips, and strategies!

The post How To Create Attraction With Your Character Traits appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Back when I started meeting and dating women I used to ask myself: “What makes someone alpha? And how to create attraction by being alpha? How man? How!?”

Well, the best relationship experts in the world are quick to tell us how to create attraction and what characteristics alpha males have. But here’s the thing: they don’t go too deep into it or explain the underlying reasons why or how to display these qualities of the so called “alpha male”, the leader of the pack, the most dominant male, or whatever you’d like to call it.

And that’s why I decided to take the time to write down some of my own insights. I’ve broken down what makes someone an alpha male into 5 things. I’m going to go through each one of them in more detail so you’ll know how to get with a girl by being an alpha male afterwards.

So heeeeere we go:

How To Create Attraction With A Silly Thing Called “Abundance”

Alpha males are not desperate. Alpha males are not needy. Alpha males are not insecure. They do not get flustered or feel down when getting rejected or blown out by a girl.

An alpha male has abundance, because he has many others to approach or talk to because he already knows them. He’s not desperate… and this is where knowing how to create attraction starts my friend.

And when HE gets rejected he thinks to himself: “oh well, have a nice day because there are more of where YOU are coming from!” and then he moves on to the next one. Having this mindstate of abundance keeps you calm, confident, and social.

Now compare THAT to the behavior of a typical guy that doesn’t know how to create attraction: nervous, pretty quiet and uncomfortable around women. Guess who of the two is more attractive to women?

The alpha male!

How To Create Attraction With Pre-Selection And Body Language

Pre selection is as simple as pie. Being with women makes you sexy. If a woman sees you having a good time with another woman and she’s having a good time too? Your stock price rises if you know what I mean, because if you’re able to be with women then they’ll see you as a guy who is liked by women.

Mix that with the jealousy plotline of being unavailable and what do you get? A powerful seduction formula. Now THAT is how to create attraction dude: make women see you with other women.

On Body Language And How To Create Attraction With It
This is more crucial than you might think, especially in a club venue, where it’s hard to have long in-depth conversations and body language takes more of a stage. To project slow movements and gestures shows you’re composed and calm: it shows that you’re in control of the situation.

So, start using body language to create attraction dude.

Leaning back has NON neediness and confidence written all over written. Having your arms open instead of folded shows you’re open and friendly. Where your eyes are roaming is equally as important though: if your scanning the club watching everyone else having a good time, you’ve lost already dude. You must BE the party and the good time!

If you’re looking around you’re looking for value, but if you’re having a blast, partying and enjoying yourself, people will come to you for value. That’s the most commen mistake men make in their own minds: thinking you need to HAVE value (have a car, money, power, looks, etc.) to create attraction, but attraction it’s all about CREATING it.

Final Thoughts On How To Create Attraction

In tribes, in government, in sports teams, the chief, the leader, the captain is the one with the highest profile. He is a leader of men and not because he tells people what to do, but because he does what he wants. He has his own ideals and ways, he will captivate people, and he’s a risk taker as well.

When a girl sees a leader she knows he will allow a girl as a guest in his world, not be one in hers. It’s his way or the highway, and thus he will not easily conform to someone and obey what’s “socially accepted”, because he only obeys what is acceptable to HIM.

Re-read that last sentence. Want to know how to create attraction? Then you’d better remember it!

Don’t Forget A Sense Of Humor Neither When Thinking Of How To Create Attraction
Make no mistake about having a sense of humor: it’s not being able to tell jokes, or having wise cracks. It’s being able to laugh at serious things and make light of a heavy situation. Being able to see the funny side of things and even about yourself, it’s not taking yourself that serious.

Why?

Because whomever can laugh at themselves and not take offense to what’s being said is REALLY confident. We all act tough and filled with confidence and we all try to act like the “alpha male”, the top dog. We joke with everyone, but as soon as someone jokes about us? What do most men do… they get all defensive!

Why? Because it’s not cool to be made a fool of and blabla, nonsense! An alpha male has the savvy to laugh at himself and not take anything serious, because he has abundance.

It’s funny, isn’t it? It’s funny that if you want to know how to create attraction, it’s easy to forget such basic concepts as “just having fun” and “not looking for someone makes the women come to you”.

If you can get these aspects right, and at times actively trigger alpha males traits, at first it can be hard, but they will eventually become like second nature. It will go along way to helping you create attraction and ultimately will give you dates…

Hope you liked my tips for how to create attraction man. I’m out!

RockyJJP

P.S. What you\'ve learned today is only the tip of the iceberg of what most men will never know about women and dating. And if you want to know more about how to meet women without much effort, then get instant access to more tips by signing up for our FREE Inner Game Insider.

The post How To Create Attraction – Being The Alpha Male appeared first on How To Win With Women.