Posted by Carlos Xuma | Posted on 15-05-2011
Because there are 7 simple rules to follow to learn when to ask a girl out and trust me when I tell you: ignore them at your own risk. Why?
Because it’s hard to answer this question about when to ask a girl out in your favor without being dishonest: “Of all the beautiful girls you have met up until a year ago… how many of them have you taken out on a date?”
Don’t worry, I’ll wait.
The reason that you can’t tell me that you dated 100% of the hot girls you have met during the last 12 months is that you did not know when to ask a girl out…
And that it’s MORE important than knowing how to ask a girl out! In come the 7 rules…
The rules of when to ask a girl out that will get you close to asking out 100% of the girls you meet THIS year.
The 7 Rules Of When To Ask A Girl Out
1) Learning when to ask a girl out starts with asking yourself: why wait?
I’ve said it a million times but I still see it happening every day. Guy calls girl, guy asks if she has time this weekend, guy may get lucky… and he may not.
Why not ask what a girl is doing RIGHT NOW man? Dude, if she has time to pick up the phone then she must have time to hang out with you. Make it a 30 minute speed date if you have to, but just remember that the best time for when to ask a girl out is right freaking now!
2) Company can kill when you ask a girl out…
A girl can always tell you that she will meet you at whatever AM at place so and so, but if she has company then the question is: does she feel comfortable doing it?
Especially when it comes to when to ask a girl out for a first date, it can be a problem if her friends are there. Or worse: her family. Even worse: her parents. It makes her feel ashamed, shy, and feel the pressure at the same time.
By asking a girl what she’s doing right now you won’t try stupid stuff like asking a girl out while her parents are with her. Because guess how that usually ends? Hint: it starts with an f and ends with –ailure. Failure.
3) You’ll know when to ask a girl out as soon as you have fun…
Because that’s when you ask her out dude! Seriously, I really don’t know where the silly idea came from that you MUST get her number, call her a couple times, and then ask her out.
If you’re already having a great time when you meet her, then why not go on a date only minutes after you met her?
And if you’re having fun the first time you call her, then why not suggest continuing the conversation over some drinks like normal people do?
Don’t wait any longer than you have to. The longer you wait, the more a girl starts thinking you are NOT interested.
4) Learn when to ask a girl out by using your strengths.
When you know you SUCK at calling girls because the minute you do, you stutter or talk really fast or freeze up? Then why ask for their phone number man? You’re much better off asking them out then and there. Much better off asking for a Facebook profile even, because screwing up the first phone call KILLS your chances with girls.
Same goes for when you’re shy at first but all fun when you meet someone the second time: get that phone number a.s.a.p., then call and ask a girl out.
Don’t make knowing when to ask a girl out harder than it needs to be. Play to your strengths.
5) When it comes to when to ask a girl out, timing is everything…
If you’re good at asking a girl out over the phone, then what are the odds of her picking up in the middle of the day? Slim. But everyone’s at home from work or college around 8 PM.
If you’re good at asking a girl out face-to-face, then what are the odds of you meeting them at 1 PM? Slim. But from 8 AM to 9 AM and from 5 PM to 7 PM? That’s when everyone goes to work/college OR goes home FROM work/college, so that’s when you go out and meet girls.
Bonus tip for when you want college girls: 8 to 11 AM and 3 PM to 5 PM are the best times for when to ask a girl out face-to-face, because that’s usually when their classes start or end.
6) Knowing when to ask a girl out is like shooting a gun: ready, aim, fire!
I think you know that walking up to a girl and immediately asking her out won’t do you much good, but it surprises me how many guys call girls and immediately pop the question.
Wrong move, my friend.
When you’re ready to ask a girl out over the phone (the method of choice for most men), then warm her up a little bit by teasing her. Joking around. And then ask her out.
It’s a ready, aim, fire thing. Not a shoot first and ask questions last situation.
7) The best time for when to ask a girl out is when talking about activities and locations
Some topics pop up naturally in a conversation. Things like what she likes to do, where she usually goes shopping, this great place where they serve the best … ever. Stuff like that.
Why not use that to your advantage?
I mean, when you’re already talking about how this or that shopping mall is so incredibly awesome… then why not tell her you want to go there with her RIGHT NOW?
It makes perfect sense: if she’s all enthusiastic and happy about an activity or a place, then why not go there for a great date?
And hey, don’t worry if you hear a “No” and are confused about when to ask a girl out afterwards. Because I know just the thing that can help you. Well, 4 things actually…
When To Ask A Girl Out If She Said “No” Before
Don’t ever think the “No” a girl gives you is a definite no, because it’s not. It’s only a “No, not yet” because they can’t decide who they fall in love with. It’s because attraction is NOT a choice, therefore they can say they don’t think they should date you all they want…
But attraction is a feeling based on emotions, so if you create the right emotions then a girl can’t help but be attracted to you. That’s right. That’s how persistent you should be when it comes to when to ask a girl out.
Having said that, I want you to know…
There are 3 things you can do when it comes to when to ask a girl out if she said “No”:
- Lower the risk for her: everything from insecurities to nightmarish exes can make a girl feel she isn’t ready for meeting you alone. I would say half the time this is the reason why girls said “No”, but the solution is simple though: tell her to bring a friend so she’s no longer alone. Then ask one of your friends to be your wingman for the other chick. It’s that simple.
- Try harder: knowing when to ask a girl out involves knowing when you have not done enough yet. When there is not enough attraction to ask a girl out. If I were you, I would try lowering the risk for her and if that isn’t enough then you KNOW you need to boost the attraction more before you ask her out. Try again after a week or so.
- Make it casual: sometimes lowering the risk and trying harder isn’t enough in the “when to ask a girl out department.” Some girls want to stay as far away from a relationship as possible and avoid dates like the plague, usually because they have a fear of commitment or they’re busy (which is an excuse for the fear of commitment). So make it casual: don’t say the word date, just ask her to come drink those awesome cocktails at bar XYZ, see the ABC movie that’s awesome, etc. and invite friends if you have to so it doesn’t feel like a date AT ALL.
When it comes to when to ask a girl out, you can also meet her at a neutral place: she doesn’t want to go to club XYZ with you? Then tell her to meet you for coffee. She doesn’t want to go to a restaurant? Then tell her you’ll buy her a burger at some fastfood place in a local mall.
That’s knowing when to ask a girl out if she isn’t comfortable around you yet: finding a place or activity that’s a little more “low key” so she’ll feel comfortable going there/doing it.
And if you want to know more about how or when to ask a girl out… including the EXACT words to say and more techniques for getting dates… then make sure you get the free tips inside my members-only Inner Game Newsletter right now.
The Newsletter gives you everything you’ll ever need to attract a girl and to ask a girl out.
One More Thing About When To Ask A Girl Out…
I’m not kidding when I tell you: if you use the 7 rules of when to ask a girl out + the 3 techniques of when to ask a girl out if she said “No” before… then success is guaranteed.
The two only exceptions I can think of are: lesbians… and bi-sexual girls who are on a girl streak right now!
That’s how powerful the insights of today’s blog post on when to ask a girl out are. I sincerely hope you liked it.
To More Dating Success,
Win With Women
P.S. Looking for more tips on how to improve your confidence... or how to approach women, oh so beautiful women? And do you want tips for how to create attraction as well? Then get instant access to more tips by signing up for our FREE Inner Game Insider.