Get off your phones and start living in the REAL world.

They can’t really be blamed for this because it can be truly terrifying to approach an attractive girl. There is always the possibility of rejection…

And there isn’t a single person on this planet who actively seeks it out.

While this fear can be completely understandable, it does mean that guys miss out on countless opportunities.

Never underestimate the value of new interactions

Forget about anything romantic – when you don’t go up to that girl at the bar , you are missing the opportunity to meet someone new. New people offer up new experiences, new insights, new stories and generally broaden one’s outlook on life.

Keep trying.

These interactions are invaluable, and they should not be passed up simply out of fear. This is obviously easier said than done, and it is at this point where it would be useful to discuss how to actually go about starting a conversation with this fabled girl.

Saying that you only have one chance is slightly melodramatic. If this is a complete stranger at a random place, then maybe you do only get one shot. But otherwise, women know that men come back, they rely on it in fact.

What this means for you is that if you missed your shot once then don’t give up hope entirely, another chance is going to roll around at some point.

Accept the fear

The fear that you feel in your gut just before you approach a girl is never going to go away completely…

It will always be there. It is going to be your constant companion, so you might as well get used to it now.

Accept the fear, acknowledge the fear and finally learn to live with it. The fear may always be present, but it should never control you.

Don’t overthink it

Don’t confuse not overthinking something and switching off your mental faculties altogether. No woman wants to talk to a man who has left his intelligence at the door. But, don’t make such a big deal out of it in your head. You are about to approach a pretty girl yes. It is going to be scary. It is not, however, such a big deal.

The risk is worth it…

She is a person just like you and for all you know she is waiting for you to make the first move. Once you have spotted the person you are interested in, take a deep breath, count to some arbitrary number in your head and then just do it.

If you delay too much, you will give your mind time to come up with a thousand reasons why you shouldn’t be approaching this girl. During that delay, your mind will become your worst enemy.

Assume she is interested in you

This is not to say that you should go around thinking that every woman is enamored by you. Confidence is one thing, narcissism is another. If you are going to be a naturall when it comes to approaching women, then you need to shift the narrative in your head.

Your first thought cannot be that she probably won’t be into you or that she is going to be annoyed by being approached by you.

It doesn’t matter what the reality is.

If you’re going to have any hope of approaching this woman, then you need to tell yourself that she wants you to. You need to think that she will be pleased by your approach and that she has been dying for you to break the ice.

You have to start somewhere…

This will not only help you get over your fear, but it will also change your entire persona when you actually are speaking to her.

You will not seem like a guy who is anticipating rejection. Rather, you will appear to be a guy who is comfortable in himself. This is a very attractive quality in a man.

Follow the 10-second rule when it comes to awkwardness

At some point, things are going to get weird. This is almost guaranteed. When things do, it is important to realize that the game hasn’t been lost. You have not failed, it is simply the natural progression of things. When the awkwardness does set in, aim to keep the conversation going for another 10 seconds.

During this time, one of three things will happen – either the awkwardness will melt away naturally, you’ll realize that you imagined it, or it will continue. In the first two cases, you have nothing to worry about.

Don’t take too long…

Don’t feel defeated though. You tried, and that is all you ever can do.

The post Starting a conversation with a girl appeared first on How To Win With Women.

1. She should say YES
2. She should NEVER say NO
3. She should really be interested – not just trying to win a free meal

I’m sure I’ll get a lot of feminist hate mail for #3, but I don’t care. I’m here to help you safely navigate the treacherous waters of dating and mating.

The ideal process of asking a girl out would never include the possibility she would say NO to you. Rejection is something men universally despise.

So I’m going to give you 3 Simple Steps to asking a girl out. I’ll also give you the (mostly) foolproof method here to accomplish the goal.

What you will have to do is bring a willingness to see the TRUTH about the girl you want, and not fool yourself about what her actual interest in you is. Because here’s my –

UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH #1: If she doesn’t really like you, then you don’t want to date her.

I know that one SHOULD be obvious.

HOWEVER you’d be surprised how many guys want to go out with a girl – even knowing that she’s not that into him. I’m not sure what the fantasy is that’s rolling around in his skull, but it should be forgotten and never entertained again.

Now I know what you’re thinking – you’re wondering why the number 1 result is her saying YES and number 2 result is her never saying NO – Aren’t those two really the same thing?

Nope…

A woman can say yes, just to get you off her back. What she really means is NO – even if she isn’t using that word.

Be willing to look at your behavior honestly…

• Are you being a little creepy or weird with her?
• Have you been asking her out every week since 2007 and she still hasn’t said no – but she also hasn’t said yes yet, either…?

Look at your own behavior and see if your persistence might have been a bit misguided. If you can’t tell, ask a friend who knows you and your situation well and will not bullsh*t you.

There’s no substitute for hearing the TRUTH – no matter how painful it may be.

Okay, so let’s move into the 3 simple steps to ask a girl out, starting with:

Get The Date – Step 1: Feel The Fear – And Act Anyway

99% of life is new to you after you’re born. From that point until you die, that percentage just keeps decreasing.

The good news is, you’ll never get to zero percent new.

Most people die with half a tank of gas and most of the world yet to see. You know what stops people from seeing and experiencing all the cool stuff out there?

FEAR

Fear is an emotion – and it’s NOT REAL. You can’t touch fear, or put fear in a bottle, or even SEE fear.

The only thing it can do is trick your brain into making you a fraidy cat.

So it’s up to you to do what you need to do. 

If you want to talk to a girl, go talk to her. Don’t think that women act like they do in youtube videos put up by “feminista gangsters.” (Those women aren’t in touch with love, only anger. Don’t listen to them.)

Women WANT men to say hi to them and talk to them.

How else would they know if they’re the beautiful creature they desperately believe they are?

You, as a man, have the ability to override any fear in your brain by banishing it.

UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH #2: Don’t Ask Just To Ask.

I see a lot of guys make this mistake – thinking that if they ask for a date, she’ll just say yes to “try you out” or take you for a test drive.

A woman knows in the first few minutes of meeting you if she’s going to sleep with you, and she might know even sooner if she WON’T sleep with you.

Your job is not to worry about that. Because the more you look like you’re worried about whether she’s going to like you, the less likely it is she will like you.

It’s a simple system to game. Just let go of your need to please and make everyone like you.

That’s actually easier than you might think…!

UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH #3: She will not ask you out.

Another reality is that she’s not going to approach you and ask you out, my friend.

If she does, great. But don’t count on it.

If any woman asks you out before you asked her, she’s always going to wonder if you just said yes to be nice to her. (Yeah, kinda like how you sometimes feel.)

So don’t rely on women to bust that move – it’s a MAN’s job.

Once you accept that life is not always going to be easy, it gets a whole lot easier.

Get The Date – Step 2: Have A Plan

When you see a pretty girl, what’s the first thing that runs through your head?

“What do I say to her?”

That’s what most guys think, and it’s also the least important thing to worry about.

Here, I’m going to erase that question from your mind. The next time you see a woman you want to ask out, say this:

“Hey, I saw you over here and I knew I would be kicking myself if I didn’t say hi. My name is ______”

BOOM! Mic drop, done.

Anyone can say that, and it’s not weird or embarrassing.

What’s that..?

You still feel a little weird approaching women?

Well, it’s not the words then, is it?

Because I just GAVE you the only words you’ll ever need to meet any woman, and you STILL can’t do it.

You know what it usually boils down to? Just having the words – AND having the courage to take action.

I’ll tell you more about how to do that in a minute, but just keep in mind that your plan is simple:

1. Have a comfortable opener to use at a moment’s notice… memorized and ready to go…
2. Talk about wherever you are or whatever you’re doing…
3. Have a simple “escape parachute” to get out of the conversation with her phone number, Facebook, or the date…

Uh, that’s it.

You don’t need a clever “dancing monkey” routine.

You don’t need anything but those two steps.

Yeah, I know there is some more padding and detail in there, and I’ll get to it in a minute…

UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTH #4: Don’t Ask A Girl Out Unless You Already Know The Answer!

Sun Tzu – author of the greatest strategic book on war of all time – The Art Of War – says this:

“Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win.”

What he means is that only IDIOTS attack someone without knowing they will win. Why would you do anything else?

Wait… seriously, before you read on – really understand what I just said…

Why would you leave any important endeavor up to CHANCE?

Risk my life, or my reputation on the flip of a coin? That’s STOOOOOPID. And if you manage your life with that kind of philosophy, expect to be a VERY sad panda.

“Figure out your strategy, and then make your victory INEVITABLE.” – Carlos Xuma

Do what it takes to MAKE the answer yes first, then – and ONLY then – ask the question.

Get The Date – Step 3: Ask Directly – Not Like a Wuss

You know how wusses ask a girl out? Like this:

“You wanna hang out later?”

WTF? Is this some kid in 3rd grade, or the girl you dig?

I’m hoping the latter.

I know what guys are doing when they approach it this way. They’re hoping they can test the waters to see if she’s really interested.

• If she says yes, he deludes himself into thinking he’s asked her out on a date…
• If she says NO, he tells himself he was just being friendly…

Can’t have it both ways, dude!

But here’s what happens when you try to avoid rejection by being indirect like this:

1. You’re going to confuse her. She might not call you on it, but she will assume you only mean a FRIENDSHIP kind of hang-out, and you’ll already be in the friend zone. (Even if she was interested in you!)
2. You’re going to look like a first rate chicken.

You don’t need to say “I like you, and I’d like to date you.” That’s a bit too much.

But you should be clear and up front so that she doesn’t wonder what your intentions are. Women hate that weaselly way that men try to avoid rejection.

Just say you’d like to “get to know her better.” That’s all she needs to hear.

Now, I know this might sound like oversimplification in some ways. Like I’m just glossing over all the important stuff.

But honestly, getting a date or asking a girl out is not that difficult. It’s everything we start thinking that gets in the way.

Most guys realize they already have all the words they need. You also probably have an intuition that it’s not the words that really matter, anyway.

It’s your confidence and attitude to use them.

To ask the question when it’s time…

To show her you’ve got what it takes…

And believe it or not, there are only a few small tweaks to have you fully prepared and ready for any situation with a woman.

When you’ve got the confidence tool set in your utility belt, you’re going to feel CONFIDENT.

• You’ll be CONFIDENT you know what to say…
• You’ll be CONFIDENT you know what to do – and when…
• You’ll be CONFIDENT she won’t shake you off your game…

If you want to get this confidence and basically plug it into your brain, you need to get yourself this Superpower For Men…
REVEALED: The Secret To Uncontrollable Sexual Desire…

Watch the Free Presentation HERE…

The post How To Ask A Girl Out – 3 Steps appeared first on How To Win With Women.

When it comes to talking to women, knowing WHAT to say is huge.

It’s probably the most common question I get from guys, in fact.

“What do I say to her?”

And it’s just as important to know how to talk to a girl in a way that gets her sexually interested in you.

Let’s start off with a few things you shouldn’t say to a girl:

DON’T SAY THIS TO HER 1: Overly personal questions…

Some guys jump right into a rapid-fire interrogation of a woman when they meet her. It’s not meant to be scary or weird, just curious.

It’s not a job interview…

But if you ask her a bunch of questions about where she lives, where she works, where she likes to hang out, etc, it can freak a girl out.

Remember, women are always sensitive and aware of the threat of possible sexual assault, so you have to be sensitive to this when talking to her.

DON’T SAY THIS TO HER 2: Complimenting her on her appearance…

There is a right way and a wrong way to bring up a woman’s appearance. Most guys use this hook as a way to flatter a woman, and it usually sounds douchey and lame.

You don’t want to launch into a speech about how hot she looks, or any kind of compliments about her body. That just feels way too weird up front.

Avoid compliments that aren’t insightful and thoughtful.

DON’T SAY THIS TO HER 3: Bragging, or any kind of grandstanding…

Guys often feel like the most important thing to do when meeting a girl for the first time is to impress her.

This is usually the WORST thing you can do.

I get it, you want to stand out from the pack and look like a high-quality mating opportunity for her, but again it just looks douchey. Kinda like those mating dances that animals do to impress each other.

Don’t be THIS guy.

When a guy tries to impress a woman up front, he’s saying: “Hey, you’re the prize and I’m just a schmuck trying to win you over. I have inferior value, so I need to try hard to get your approval.”

The high value man doesn’t play this game. He knows that he wants HER to start trying to impress him as soon as possible in the conversation.

Don’t give your power away with this kind of needy behavior.

Okay, so what SHOULD you say to a girl?

Let’s cover a few of them:

What To Say To A Girl 1: “You caught my eye…”

Actually, you want to say this subtly, but you should give her a reason for your approaching her. Every woman knows WHY you’re talking to her – you want to bang her. It’s simple sexual science.

But she also wants to hear it in a way that tells her you’re confident and you’re going after what you want. That alone is flattering to her.

DOn’t let a good opportunity pass you by.

So just tell her something like:

“Hey, I saw you and thought you had a real nice energy about you. I knew I’d kick myself later if I didn’t say hi. My name’s ________”

That’s a sure-fire opener that will get you into a conversation with just about any girl.

Just say it with a level of seriousness. I see a lot of guys that approach and talk to women with a tone that is goofy and awkward – and they’re doing it on purpose! Usually to avoid being vulnerable in the event they’re rejected.

The beauty of this opener is that she can’t reject you. You just started a conversation based on curiosity. That’s it.

What To Say To A Girl 2: “I’m impressed…”

Letting a woman know you’re impressed with her is a subtle way of implying that she is working to get your approval. It’s a great way of flipping the tables on her so that she doesn’t think you’re just some guy trying to kiss her butt to get into her bed.

During the course of the conversation, if she says something you find interesting – or approval worthy – just say: “Huh. I’m impressed…”

She’ll feel acknowledged, and she’ll instantly feel a little pull towards you that she can’t explain.

What To Say To A Girl 3: “You look like trouble…”

This one goes way back to the old “pickup artist” days…

Basically you tell her how you see her as being a “bad girl.” Women like this mostly because they’ve been framed by society as these pure, snow-white angels of virtue. Girls can do no wrong, we’re told over and over again.

NOT!

Nothing sexier than a woman who can handle her own…

And not only is this false, she’s also dying to find a guy that knows it and is savvy enough to bring it out in the light. To talk about it.

Just tell her:

“You look like trouble. Are you planning a bank heist … like ‘Ocean’s 8’ or something?”

You’re not trying to brag your way into her world – you’re showing her that you’re seeing HER. This is a major turn-on for women.

They are obsessed with being able to cast a spell over the male mind… being so irresistible that you will crawl through miles of broken glass just to cry in her shadow.

What To Say To A Girl 4: “Maybe I was wrong about you…”

Another way to covertly flatter a woman (while positioning yourself as a high-value Alpha man) is to tell her you’re changing your mind about her.

Now, she might not have had the first care about what you think of her – at first. But once you tell her that you’re starting to warm up to her:

• She feels a jolt of approval…
• She wonders, “Wait… he didn’t like me before? WHY?”

It’s a little mind-trick, but it’s something that positions you much better in her mind than just blanketly approving of her. Most “nice guys” make this mistake of approving all over her – gushing their desire on her like a bad porn movie.

Drop that attitude now, because it’s the one thing that has kept you stuck in the friend zone with most of the women you meet.

You want to imply that you’re just starting to warm up to her, and it’s surprising. Get her to understand how she needs to step up and work for YOUR approval.

What To Say To A Girl 5: “No way…”

Again, most guys spend far too much time agreeing with women.

Another way to spark some attraction is to pull back a bit in disbelief. You can do this with slight sarcasm, or just a hint of “yeah… rrrrright.”

As your conversation progresses, and you start to warm up to each other, find a ripe moment where you can just not believe something she says.

Pique her interest with a good challenge…

Maybe she says she’s on her way to meet her mom for lunch…

“Yeah, right… I bet you use that on all the guys you’re trying to escape.”

Maybe she says she’s going to pick up her car from the shop…

“No way. You’re definitely a ‘lease the Lexus’ kind of girl. I’m not buying it.”

It’s playful and fun, with a hint of teasing.

What To Say To A Girl 6: “You like me…”

Again, in the vein of ‘things to say that reverse the roles…’

What you want to do is imply that she likes you, in a funny, non-douchey way.

• She says: “Oh, I don’t like that coffee” (or anything where she disagrees with you.)
• YOU say: “You’re starting to like me, huh?” (Smirk)

It’s your turn to play ‘hard to get’…

The humor should be there, of course. And it’s something that will get a laugh from her as well.

It’s also a way of breaking out of the usual routine of complimenting and kissing her ass all the time.

Just imply with an oblivious tone that she’s falling in like with you.

What To Say To A Girl 7: “That’s it, we’re done…”

You have to realize that 99% of all guys say the exact same things to a woman.

Usually involving him pretending to want to be a friend so he can, maybe, sneak into being her boyfriend in some magical fantasy he’s concocted in his head.

The pretending to be a friend is, of course, just another way to avoid the risk of being rejected. And in so doing ensures that he only winds up as her friend.

You have to know the kind of fun, challenging things to tell her that will spark her interest.

Who can resist cute, little furry animals?

One of the best is to pretend that you’re both already dating, and now it’s over.

“Yeah, I’m thinking we need to breakup. I’ll take the cats, you take the microwave. Deal?”

For one, woman hate the “breakup zone” so she’ll instantly be triggered to WANT to connect with you by framing it like this.

For another, it demonstrates that you can push back and disapprove of her – heck, even present yourself as a guy who can break it off with a woman. Jokingly.

There’s a lot going on with this one, and it is all good.

Plus, it’s funny.

And even more important, you need to know how to talk to women – and not have to memorize any lines…

Women are turned on by words, in fact.

But when you’re in the moment, face-to-face with a girl, you know you’re probably going to forget everything, right?

It’s like getting on stage for a play and forgetting your lines…

And that’s what usually stops guys from ever talking to a woman in the first place.

I’ve got the perfect solution for you –

I want to show you how to unleash a woman’s erotic desire for you – with only words.

Go watch my free presentation on how to have Fearless Conversation With Any Woman

The post What To Say To A Woman – 7 Phrases That Make Women Hot For You appeared first on How To Win With Women.

This week, I’ve got you something from the mailbag…

QUESTION FROM A READER:

Carlos, I’ve been going out on a ton of dates lately, but I’ve run up against some obstacles.

I get into conversations with women, but I can’t seem to break into the “attraction zone” with many of the women. They all seem to keep me on this friendship level, and I don’t know what to do.

I want to get our conversations on a sexual level somehow…

What should I do?

• Pete W. – Manhattan, KS

______________________

CARLOS ANSWERS:

Pete, that’s a fantastic question that men everywhere want to know the answer to… in fact, it’s the key to kick-starting a woman’s attraction in that first conversation with her.

Will he be… “friend-zoned?

• The Text is what you’re saying to each other – the actual words you use.
• The Subtext is what you’re saying under your words, with your attitude and your way of being.

Inner Game = Outer Game

1) Tone of voice:  Lower your vocal pitch as low as you can go.

Find your “inner” Barry White…

2) Body posture & stance:  Slow everything down to half-speed…

3) Eye contact:  This is a huge one, because – as they say – the eyes are the windows to the soul.

The post How To Make A Conversation Sexual – 3 Tips appeared first on How To Win With Women.

One thing I’ve learned doing dating coaching over the last 16 years, and that’s this:

Most men (and women!) have almost NO CLUE about how attraction between the sexes really works.

Now, when I say NO CLUE – I mean that they THINK they understand it, and PRETEND to understand relationships, but honestly don’t. I think it’s mostly because they don’t want to seem like they’re ignorant to the other 98% of the population that is also pretending to know what they’re doing.

Most of the guys who pretend to know how to date a lot of girls will give you the same lame advice:

• “Dude, you gotta be confident…”
• “You gotta know how to talk to women…”
• “You gotta know how to dress…”
• “You gotta…”

Well, sad to say that half of these guys are usually “naturals” with women (meaning they intuitively have gotten women without knowing what the $#&% they are doing, or they’re good looking.)

The other half are guys that don’t really have ANY skill with women, but just happen to have a girlfriend at the moment. Which means they’re currently doing 100% better than you, and they think that entitles them to tell you “how the game works.”

My sales mentor from years ago once told me:

“Don’t ever take advice from someone who’s not doing what you want to be doing. Or has what you want.”

I’d add to that:

“Don’t take advice from lucky fools.”

They don’t know, but they’re pretend it was all skill, and then they’ll confuse and ruin you.

Instead, go to the guy who knows how it works – AND can explain it! That’s why you’re here, I’m assuming.

So if you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why the hell can’t I get a girlfriend?” – I’m about to give you some earth-shaking revelations. Starting with:

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #1: You reek of desperation…

Now, before you dismiss this as not applying to you, let me remind you that NO ONE thinks they’re acting desperately. Unfortunately this is the delusion that is ultimately going to make them marry a woman WAY below they’re pay grade.

Desperation shows in many ways:

• Too eager
• Too “there”
• Too attentive

The sad fact is that many women can be snowed over with this behavior. Especially if she doesn’t get asked out a lot. She will likely be so starving for attention and to have a guy desire her that she can’t tell the difference between desperate neediness and romantic obsession.

To be fair, most guys don’t know the difference.

Which means you need to ask and find out if you’re coming across with a stench of clingy weirdness.

(This is also what people mean when they say you need to “be more confident.” Confidence is the polar opposite of desperation.)

Oh, and don’t ask your best ‘girl buddy’ about this. Chances are she’s only hanging around you because your lack of interest is challenging and attractive to her, OR she’s taken you on as a pet project.

Ask a guy who is known for telling the painful truth, not a friend. If you want the truth, go hunt it down.

Don’t believe the B.S. other people spew as gospel.

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #2: You have no social proof…

Social proof is based on the idea of social influence, stating that people will conform in order to be liked or accepted by the influencer (or society).

What that’s saying is that if the group likes it, we like it. If the group accepts it, we tend to accept it.

That group can even be just one person that has a lot of influence.

So here’s the deal: Do you have people that know you and like you? You have to make sure women encounter you with those people.

A lone wolf approach is going to immediately brand you as unproven, strange, and not quite trustworthy.

If you have no friends, that should be your first order of business – WAY before finding a girlfriend. If you did manage to get a girlfriend with no social circle of your own, she’s going to lose you faster than an ass rash, or ask you to join her Goth Facebook page.

Social proof defines humans in a social order. Think of it as your social “credit rating.”

And women want to know you’ve got the points…

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #3: You’re a victim of your own issues…

I talk to guys all the time that are perfectly fine looking, earn a good income, and just look fantastic – on paper.

But the second they go out on a date, or even manage to meet a woman, their weird emotional issues start getting triggered. I call this their “Weird Stuff.”

The do all kinds of things to ruin it for themselves:

• Get jealous, or needy…
• Get hung up on ONE girl that they can never have…
• Get critical and picky – basically pushing every girl away…
• Lose their willingness to stay clean and well shaven
• They start to get insecure and talk themselves into screwing it up

This list could be so long that it would literally break the page you’re reading it on. It also includes things like being too picky to avoid intimacy and connection, as well as a bunch of other “issues.”

The point is that every guy out there knows what his “stuff” is. And every single one of those guys is trying to cover it up with what I call “guy-makeup.” Women cover up imperfections in their face with makeup, and guys like this do the same thing by covering up their weird behaviors (and confidence issues) with guy-makeup.

If you’re going to get that girl, you have to work on yourself, chum. There’s nothing in the world that’s going to keep a woman from seeing through that.

Sooner or later, your Weird Stuff shows up.

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #4: You have exactly NO balls…

These days guys seem to really run around in a constant fear of rejection. I’m not going to label generations, but you know what I’m talking about MILLENNIALS! 

I’m kind of kidding there… it’s just about every generation that expects women to walk up and approach THEM. They expect the woman to initiate.

Look, I’m sorry the media has completely misled you on this, but women’s equality does NOT mean she’s just been waiting for the go ahead to start hitting on you.

Men are the supply, and women are the demand.

Men want what women got, so they get to wait for us to step up and prove ourselves to them. It’s the way of nature, and you’re lack of courage won’t change that.

I was like this once myself. Secretly hoping that I could put on a dash of some secret cologne and women would just dog-pile on me.

IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN!

Anyone that promises this to you isn’t being up-front.

Sure, you can get women feeling attraction and fighting over you – but that takes some skills you probably don’t have right now. AND you still have to reach out and be seen by them in the first place.

So rather than hope you can skate by on a wish and a prayer, you’d be better off figuring out why women seem so scary to you that you can’t even talk to them.

Because if you’re a fraidy cat now, she’s going to make sure you really don’t have any balls in the relationship.

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #5: You avoid social situations…

This includes avoiding groups of people for a wide variety of reasons, including the ones that start out with you self-identifying with your “Weird Stuff” I talked about above.

Look, I get it. I’m an introvert at heart. I get my recharge by being alone and playing video games and playing guitar.

A lot of guys who can’t get laid resort to reading and theorizing about the world a lot. They have very little actual practical experience because they want to avoid action. And the best delay tactic is to be stuck in never-ending book learning.

But ultimately, humans are social animals and need to socialize. Not only for friendships, but yeah – to get a girlfriend you need to meet people.

So you have to let go of your fears about social awkwardness a bit. I see a lot of guys who hold on to their solitary lifestyle and defend it with the fervor of a Southern Baptist Pastor on Sunday.

Stop avoiding people and relating to people. Drop your resistance – and you just might find that it’s not so bad as you think.

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #6: You’re a negative Nancy…

This reason for not having a girlfriend is similar to the antisocial one in #5 above. A lot of guys use negativity as a defense mechanism, too.

My personal flavor was one of angry sarcasm and dark humor. I came across as funny, but painfully so.

In the end, I didn’t attract anyone because I was so negative about things. The funny part was that I really wasn’t really a negative guy. I just did it for the laughs.

Once you let go of the anger and feelings of injustice that we men often wallow in, we’re more open to people.

Negativity will drown you in emptiness, so let go of that need to pre-judge the world…

Why can’t I get a girlfriend?  REASON #7: You have NO PLAN…

Let’s face it – most guys wing it.

I did.

I went for years thinking I could just “figure women out” and get what all the other guys were getting. I ended up so wrong that I almost jumped off a bridge.

So don’t ever delude yourself into thinking that love, sex, and relationships are subjects that you’re just “born knowing.”

NO one comes factory installed with the knowledge to attract women.

No one has a “map to my girlfriend” tattooed on their arm for easy reference.

That’s why I made a plan of my own.

I sat down and mapped out all the things you need to get a girlfriend in one easy reference tool…

Go get your copy here…

The post Why You Can’t Get A Girlfriend – 7 Reasons appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Women are attracted to masculine men, no matter what the media tries to tell you.

You’re going to hear more and more nauseating, confusing and ridiculous information that tells you to “condemn the patriarchy” and embrace someone else’s ‘vision’ (agenda) for the future.

Go ahead and listen to them, and read them if you like, but keep your critical thinking hat on.

Don’t let them confuse you from the truth about what women want.

Is this what a REAL man looks like?

Women want one thing and one thing only, no matter how much everyone tries to believe the opposite:

Women want real MEN.

What’s a ‘real man,’ anyway? Isn’t that subjective?

Doesn’t that just change depending on who you ask?

No, not really.

Masculine – AKA ‘manly’ – traits are fairly consistent.

In my 16 years of doing this dating advice for men gig, one thing I’ve noticed is that feminists (and women with issues – often the same people) rarely (like almost NEVER) challenge me. They seem to sense right off the bat that I’m fully grounded in my identity as a man. I don’t buy into their fluffy white idealistic new-age nonsense.

And yet I see men everywhere challenged in their identities, words, and actions.

It’s a shame, because these are otherwise solid and well-meaning guys. But they lack the fortitude and conviction in themselves to transmit a vibe of MAN to the outside world.

Now, I’m not some knuckle-dragging Neanderthal. I’m not some one-dimensional idiot from a 1940’s movie.

Nor do I rage with testosterone 24/7.

I’m sophisticated and peaceful. And I know a thing or two about cultivating the attitude that women love. That’s why I wrote this little manifesto today for you.

In honor of the passing of R. Lee Ermey (the amazing drill instructor from “Full Metal Jacket“) – this is going to feel a bit like boot camp to you.

Suck it up, Buttercup…

So let’s dig in right now with the 3 Steps to becoming the man women desire…

Become The Alpha Man – Step 1: Grow A Pair, Soldier…!

I’m profoundly disturbed by the culture of waffling, weaseling, and sneakiness I see in men around me every day. I think this was cultivated from too many hours poring over their social media. Trying to make themselves not feel jealous of other people’s lives… and failing.

Posting images of what you ate last night?

Seriously?

Food porn?

I could not give shit-one about that. Anyone else that “likes” that image of your quail-egg soup is also not caring; they’re simply conditioned by the Facebook Illuminati to hammer away at that button whether or not they care. They’ve trained our brain’s reward system to “get off” on our phones.

Realize This: People don’t really “like” something if all they had to do was spend a microsecond hitting a blue button…

What they were doing was yelling “Hey! I’m here! I matter! Don’t forget about me!” into the void.

That’s what most people are doing out there. Hoping that – in this mindless chatter of internet idiocy, we don’t get forgotten. After all, we all deserve to be celebrities!

Right?

WRONG. 

REMEMBER: 90% of the things people post in social media are the fake, smiley propaganda of their lives. They’re just as desperate, unhappy, and unfulfilled as everyone else. They’re just trying to make up a better marketing campaign so that you might not see it.

Social media is a lie.

The truly successful aren’t on Facebook or Instagram posting their successes – they’re living them.

Get your balls back and start to reclaim your confidence and convictions.

Stop living your life in the virtual world.

Start by drawing yourself up a list of the virtues you stand for. I’ll bet not one man in a hundred has ever done this, but it’s essential to who you are. (I’ve attached my complete list of virtues at the end of this article. Use them as your reference.)

Women are attracted – almost unconditionally – to a man who knows what he stands for. It’s the reason that women don’t test or push me around. They know I’m solid and grounded.

And they should know the same about you, soldier.

Take action. Get busy.

You’ve got a good 50 to 60 more years in you, if you don’t eat junk food and get diabetes by 25 like most of the new crop these days.

Go ask that chick out… stop worrying about “the perfect words.” (The Perfect Words  are simply the ones you actually say instead of think.)

She’ll say yes BECAUSE YOU ASKED with conviction, not because you waited 10 years for just the right thing to say to avoid rejection.

Go stir some things up and make a mess. The world gets down on its knees and unzips your pants when you jump in the game instead of trying to watch from your iphone.

“Conflict is a forge for the steel of your willpower.” – Carlos Xuma

Be The Man Women Want – Step 2: Get Out Of The Cry Closet…!

You’re still here, Private? Good! You haven’t rung the bell and quit? Fantastic!

Now drop your hanky, and cut that weepy crap.

Too much indulgence in sadness make a man pathetic.

I’m about as kind, compassionate, and loving as you’re ever going to find in a guy – so don’t mistake this for macho posturing.

But these days everyone seems to need their weepy emotions aired to everyone else because we all think our emotions matter more than anything.

NEWS FLASH! Emotions are an energy source for men. Not your ‘cry closet.’

Emotions are not your place to sulk and ruminate. That’s for women.

Every guy came fresh from the factory with a hot little pepper of anger inside that he needs to tame and utilize for his power. Your anger is a nugget of plutonium

And also – drop that crying crap right now. It’s like this new revolution encouraging men to start acting pathetic. You can FEEL your sadness, son. But you CONTAIN those emotions. Throw boundaries around them – and then channel them over to your batteries.

Crying is surrender.

Crying is “I give up.”

That’s how you feel when you do it, if you think back to how it feels on the inside. It’s a complete resignation that comes from your core.

And that is something no man can entertain. And after a while this reaction becomes rehearsed, and starts to turn you into a weak, rubbery … well, girl.

Look – that’s not an insult to women. Women can handle their emotional highs and lows – they’re used to riding them. It’s part of a woman’s nature to deal with vacillating emotions.

“If civilization had been left in female hands we would still be living in grass huts…”
– Camille Paglia (renowned feminist)

But men use their emotions as fuel for forward progress. We are the action that supports their emotional insight.

Again, FEEL your emotions – but do not DWELL on them!

(By the way – cry closets are a real thing that some universities have implemented for the wuss students that can’t handle their own emotions. And you should be a little shocked by that…)

Be An Attractive Alpha Man – Step 3: Drop the Mic…!

Okay, you made it to Step 3, so I’m promoting you Private FIRST CLASS.

And you’re ready to hear the one thing that’s gonna make panties drop around the world for you…

You need to drop your mic…

Be the man she’s been waiting for…

Yup, show-stopping commitment to your convictions means you speak your mind and drop the microphone.

Walk off stage, and get to work.

There is no dress-rehearsal for life. You’re in the mix right now, grunt.

So make a DECISION. That’s really what I’m talking ’bout here.

Stop waffling and start committing yourself to a story of your own making. Don’t wait for other people to choose for you. Because as Rush said in “Free Will”:

“If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.”

Plant your flag and stand for what you believe in. This is the source of that “confidence” everybody tells you to have to attract girls.

They’re right – though it’s not the false confidence of a “pickup line.” It’s the real, dyed-in-the-wool feeling of being VALID.

Worthy.

Only YOU can give yourself that, son.

Stake your claim…

Just check in with reality (such that it is) from time to time to make sure you’re not off on another delusion that the world made up to distract you.

Make sure you read classic literature for being a man:

• The Prince – Nicolo Machiavelli
• 48 Laws Of Power – Robert Greene
• Call of the Wild – Jack London
• Fight Club – Chuck Palahniuk
• Walden – Henry David Thoreau
• The Art Of War – Sun Tzu
• Tao Te Ching – Lao Tzu (no relation to Sun.)

– or the writings of Seneca and Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations (which is free on the web.) These guys had masculinity all sewn up and tattooed on their souls over 2000 years ago.

Being a man is an opportunity and a PRIVILEGE! Though, you might not know it from the way people talk these days.

• Ignore the politically charged deluded people out there trying to bend reality to their weaknesses…
• Ignore the obviously misguided masses who only want attention to their plight – whatever it is. (Frankly if it’s not starvation, your whining is just getting on everyone’s nerves.)
• Ignore the people who really only want to grab their own power and control you…

It’s time to drop your mic right now.

Make a decision to start living your life instead of projecting it at other people. Your life isn’t a rumor or a publicity stunt. It’s comprised of the time you’ve got to make your mark, soldier.

It’s what separates the boys from the men – and it’s what makes women want them.

If you want to know more about the complete plan to be an Alpha Man, go here…

• Carlos X.

______________________

VIRTUES:

Wisdom

• Curiosity
• Love of learning
• Judgment
• Ingenuity
• Emotional intelligence
• Perspective

Courage

• Valor
• Perseverance
• Integrity

Humanity

• kindness
• Loving

Justice

• citizenship
• Fairness
• Leadership

Temperance

• Self control
• Prudence
• Humility

Transcendence

• Appreciation of beauty and excellence
• Gratitude
• Hope
• Spirituality
• Forgiveness
• Humour
• Zest

The post 3 Steps To Becoming The Man That Women Want appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Texting women these days can be tricky…

You just don’t know what kind of response she will throw at you, and you need to know how to handle her testing. She’s always looking for a reason to poke and prod your act to see if you’re a real man with the ability to drive up her attraction – or destroy it.

In case you didn’t know, texting is a great way to drive up interest from a woman, but it’s also where most guys screw it up.

Here’s how:

• You text too frequently: Women know that a guy who’s texting them a lot in the first few days of meeting her is probably either needy, or just doesn’t have anything else going on. This communicates your social value…
• You text too long: Most guys write texts that are WAYYYY too many words. If you text anything that exceeds the 160 character limit, you’re looking like a try-hard…
• You text too much of the same jokey crap: Stop being a comedian all the time and vary it up. Send her a tease, followed by an insight, followed by your lunch choice… keep her guessing!

Let’s talk about 7 situations where you will need to text her, and how to handle each one. These 7 stealth texts will show you by example what to text a girl…

Starting with:

Stealth Text 2 – What To Text Her: The After-Text

After you meet a girl – in a bar, at a party, whatever – you need to cement yourself into her mind. Chances are, if she was attractive to you, she was attractive to other guys who talked to her that night.

No, huckleberry, you ain’t the only game in town…

You need to make sure you stand out in her mind so that she won’t wonder: “340-334-4145… Who the hell is this?”

In fact, if you’ve ever gotten a text from a girl that said “Who is this?” you know how far behind you are already. That’s one of the worst texts you can get from a girl. Period.

To stand out, you remind her with your name, something she laughed at that night, followed by a sign-off.

Here’s a great one:

“Hey, it’s Carlos – was great meeting you ‘Kittty kicker’ – Let’s reconnect this week…”

In this case, you two were joking about the story she told you about the time she accidentally kicked her sister’s cat. It’s a tease, and it’s perfect to use. Then you hint that you’ll be in touch.

Now she knows who you are, you reminded her of your confidence, and you’re perfectly setup for:

Stealth Text 2 – Text Her THIS: The Warmup Text

You gotta follow up and reconnect with her, ideally within 24-48 hours. There’s a lot of debate on this on the Internet, but take it from Uncle Carlos – you don’t want her to forget you, so act quicker. Just do it with confidence.

You want to remind her again about your connection, and get her warmed up with this:

“Hey, Kitty… How’s your week going? I know you’re missing those laughs from Saturday…”

BOOM! She’s reminded, and you even managed to squeeze in a little callback to that tease about kicking the cat. Without being obnoxious, by the way.

Be careful you don’t overdo any particular tease too many times. It’s douchey.

Right after she responds to this, you hit her with:

Stealth Text 3 – What To Text Her: The Meetup Text

Yeah, baby – it’s time to slap this one on the ass and get it moving…

After her warmup response, you’re going to go for the meetup request. You have to see if this is going to go somewhere.

This step is HUGE – because if there’s anywhere it goes weird, it’s in this call to action step.

• If she’s into it, she’ll jump on it…
• If she’s hesitant, you’ll sense it…
• If she’s reluctant, you’ll KNOW it…

So send her this next:

“Going to the (name of brewery, restaurant, coffee shop, etc) tomorrow night – let’s get together!”

Then listen to her response, because it’s highly likely that she will throw out some random nonsense for you.

Just a note here: The best thing to do is to resist the urge to do too much convincing… Just plow forward with the assumption that she’s a LUNATIC if she doesn’t meet up with you.

By the way, if you believe too deeply that YOU are the one who would be lucky if SHE agrees, you gotta do some inner game work, my friend.

Stealth Text 4 – Send This Text: The Plow Forward Text

When a girl tests you by resisting, what she wants to see is sincerity in your efforts to woo her. Women don’t believe your words, they believe the meaning they get from the ATTITUDE behind the words… and your actions, of course.

Women are INTERPRETIVE creatures, which means they read into you based on the vibe you give off.

The words of this text are less important than the attitude.

So here’s a really good attitude text to plow her forward:

“Are you crazy? We’re gonna have such a great conversation & you’re stalling? You’re so cute…! What time can you meet me?”

If she insists on pushing you back and not committing (which is still highly likely), you should pick up the phone and TALK to her. Never let a girl get away with pushback. Hearing your voice will make it real. Right now you’re just words on a screen.

Don’t be a chicken-sh*t and avoid talking to her because you’re afraid to confront these things and deal with them, you dig?

Chances are high that she will give in and agree when she hears a real voice.

Next up:

Stealth Text 5 – What To Text Her: The Reminder Text

The younger the girl, the more likely she will no-show you. It’s nothing personal, she’s just playing out her mindless automatic program.

So you want to make sure she feels like complete crap if she does flake on you.

This one is a little edgy, but you can pull it off:

“Hey, I promised the sick kids at the hospital we’d be there at 7:30 to cheer them up, so you better be on time! ;-)”

If you don’t get a response to your text – no matter what you send – you still want to show up at the place you agreed.

However, you need to get a friend to be there with you in case she does flake. This way you won’t feel dumb, and you’ll be able to let it go quicker.

And if she shows, you look more socially desirable. Just introduce your friend, then bid him farewell.

You can also send a more gentle reminder like this:

“Hey girl… no flake-outs, I’ll see you tonight at 7:30… ;-)”

If she texts anything but an enthusiastic “I’ll be there” – you should call her again and go voice.

Stealth Text 6 – How To Text Her: The Running Late Text

This one is a great way to demonstrate value AND remind her of her obligation. If you think you have this girl pretty well locked in, send her this… it will drive up your value and her investment in you:

“Hey, girl… wanted to be a little early, but running a few minutes behind… See you there”

This is great for a reminder text because it shows you’re not too needy.. and if she’s got any BS to throw at you about flaking, now is when she’ll tell you.

Stealth Text 7 – What To Text A Girl: The Finisher Text

When your date is over, you want to finish up right where we started this whole thing – with a text that will cement you in her head as the man she wants.

Of course, this is assuming that you aren’t already in a position to just roll over and talk to her at the end of the night…

By the end of this one-on-one date, you better have impressed her enough to be memorable.

If you don’t know how to do it, you need to learn about Sexual Sparks – and how to push her brain into attraction for you.

With this finisher text, you’re going to be a little bit more cocky, with the purpose of making her value YOU as the prize.

Don’t be arrogant! Just be cocky & funny…

Try this 2-part text:

Part A: “OK that was probably THE best time you’ve had all year…”

Part B: “You’re kinda fun, too! Just don’t start stalking me yet…”

Let her say whatever she’s going to say, just don’t read into it too deeply. Let these texts sit with her for a good 15-20 minutes before you even THINK of replying.

Another mistake guys make is, in their eagerness to get a girl to text them back or like them, they text her back WAY too soon.

Wait at least a few minutes before responding to a girl. If you have any questions why, just remember the last time YOU texted a girl and had to wait for what seemed like an eternity for her response. That time she’s waiting, she’s thinking about you.

Driving up her attraction and desire in the process.

There you go, my friend. You’re now in a position of high value if you followed this chain to the end.

But there’s so much more you need to know to make sure you can handle any of the curve balls she throws you…

Go watch this quick video presentation –

And discover the secret to uncontrollable sexual desire…

The post What To Text A Girl – 7 Stealth Texts To Attract Women appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Life would be a helluva lot easier if you could just open an app on your phone and it would show you all the women around you that were into you.

Problem is, that app is a long way off in the future. So instead of wishing on a dream, why don’t we talk about the real world?

If you want to know if a chick likes you, you need to know what signs to watch for.

Let’s start with:

How to tell if a girl is into you – Signal #1: She’s whipping her mane…

There’s a great scene in Charlies Angels (the movie from way back) where Lucy Liu advises Cameron Diaz to “flip your damn hair.” Cameron does, and the guy loses his mind for her.

To be fair, Cameron would only have to show up for guys to lose it over her, but whatever.

That hair-flip maneuver works, though. It’s part of a whole set of actions women take subconsciously that give away her true interest level in you.

It’s called Primping. These are body language “tells” that show how much she wants you.

She’ll do stuff like:

• Flip her hair
• Play with her straw
• Giggle
• Fix her blouse
• Fix her hair

The list is really endless. Just watch out for those signs she’s giving off that tell you she’s lovin’ it…

How to tell if a girl is digging you – Signal #2: She’s smiling more than the Joker…

The reality of a woman’s interest is that she’s going to go a little over board to make sure you get the hint that she’s interested in you. Women usually put out way too many signals to count when she’s ready to play.

Smiling is one of those things she won’t be able to help herself from doing. She’ll smile a lot to show her happiness.

• Happy that she found a guy she didn’t have to lose like a case of the crabs…
• Happy that she doesn’t have to sit there alone and wonder if every person in there is judging her because she’s not talking to someone…

Happiness is going to show as a smile on her face.

If she looks too serious, you should consider that a sign of disinterest – especially if she isn’t ponying up some conversation to keep things going.

How to tell if a girl likes you – Signal #3: She’s confusing you…

On the other hand, a woman often doesn’t know how to make you understand she likes you without pulling away her interest every couple minutes.

This happens when she likes you, and starts showing that she likes you, and then realizes she’s showing her interest. Then she acts the opposite way to be “hard to get.” Mostly so she doesn’t have to feel like a “slut.”

Look, I didn’t make them like this. I know it sounds kind of crazy.

But that’s how women think. 

They’re riding this insane roller coaster of emotions in their head (all self-generated emotions, mind you – but she wouldn’t believe that.) And she doesn’t realize how her actions reflect the awkward and irrational stuff in her head.

So if she’s confusing you with hot & cold signals, you can assume that there’s some interest there. If she wasn’t interested at all, you would only get the not-interested version of her.

How to tell if a girl wants you – Signal #4: She’s Laughing…

Not laughing AT you, but with you.

This is kind of a cliche, but it’s true. Women don’t want to lead guys on, so she won’t laugh at anything you’re saying if she’s not genuinely interested.

How to tell if a girl is attracted to you – Signal #5: She’s All Touchy…

If she’s suddenly touchy-feely with you, she’s got to be considering you as a romantic interest. Women don’t usually get physical with a guy they’re not at least a little interested in.

Now there’s another reason that women do this, and that’s to “Stir The Pot.”

You see, women like to provoke things to find out what emotions are involved. She’s wondering if she has any power or control over you, and she might be doing this to see how you’ll respond. If you get too touchy back, she’ll shut you down.

So just take it in stride and stay relaxed.

How to tell if she wants you – Signal #6: She’s Jealous…

If you talk to another girl and she gets snippy or weird on you, chances are:

1. She’s interested – and
2. She’s triggered…

By triggered, I mean that she’s got some emotional baggage that just came to the surface.

A lot of women have weirdness around handling situations with another woman in the picture. Either she’s been cheated on before, or she’s got some insecurities about relationships with competition in them.

Either way, it’s a good sign to start out with. But stay frosty and keep an eye out that she doesn’t have a psycho vibe underneath that. Sometimes a woman’s crazy will completely overtake her interest and feelings for you, and it will get weird – fast.

How to tell if a girl is into you – Signal #7: She hunts you down…

If a girl is interested in a guy, she will not want to take a chance that you’ll find someone else and ditch her. Women HATE lost opportunities.

So watch for her to actively try to get back with you. If you’re in a bar or club, she’ll find you. Or make her way back to you in some way.

She will have to do it by breaking away from her clique of chick friends, though, so be on the lookout for her. If she’s trying, you have to jump back in once you’ve confirmed she’s searching.

But also realize that if she’s hot, she doesn’t need to hunt anyone down.

Keep an eye out for her interest, and act while you’ve got her interest pointed toward you…

How to tell if a girl is into you – Signal #8: She points out the coinky-dinks…

If she’s liking you, she’s also going to seize any opportunity to send a signal to you that says: “Hey, this is destiny!”

She’ll pick up on any random thing that you both like, no matter how stupid.

“Hey, we both like breathing and eating food!”

Okay, maybe not that stupid, but you’ll know it when you hear it. She’ll point out simple, stupid things that connect you.

Like:

• Same taste in music
• Same taste in TV shows
• Same taste in food
• Same taste in drinks

You get the picture.

By the way, if you spot something she likes that’s particularly obscure – and you like it – you should point it out. She’ll take it as a sign.

Or … not.

How to tell if a girl is into you – Signal #9: She’s giving you verbal signals…

Women are both subtle AND predictable when it comes to language…

She will say things that are meant to be a green light for you to move forward with her. And if you don’t catch these signals, you might lose your shot. She only opens her window of interest for a short time, and she expects YOU to know when that happens!

Now, you have to know how to talk to a woman to find out if she’s giving you these signals. Otherwise, you’ll be waiting and hoping for them to show up. And that could be a long time coming…

The best thing you can do is know all the signals to look for – AND how women are triggered to feel attraction for you.

I’ve just put the finishing touches on a program that was designed to help you understand how to hack the game of romance with women.

Don’t do what the other guys are doing – playing the game randomly. As they say, the house ALWAYS wins over suckers.

Instead, get the upper hand – and get that special girl… 

Watch this free presentation on The Sexual Sparks… 

Discover The Secret To Uncontrollable Sexual Desire

The post How to tell if a girl is into you… 9 Signals appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Sometimes it seems like finding a good woman is like finding a $20 bill in an old coat…

Rare, unexpected, and a welcome surprise.

The truth is that it’s harder and harder to find a woman who “gets it” when it comes to men. Most women today were raised by women who were raised by single-moms, or had weak role models when it came to masculinity.

Would she consider this a real man?

It’s super rare to find women who understand, accept, and celebrate men.

These days, all you hear are feminist rants against the “patriarchy.”

All you hear about in the news media are stories about men (usually celebrities) misbehaving. (Kudos to Fox news for at least trying to balance the scales a bit.)

Look, guys can act pretty nasty when left to their own devices… but most guys are good men. Most women will probably assume the opposite, though.

So if you want to find a quality girlfriend, I won’t kid you – it’s going to be a challenge.

But if you have the ability to attract women – and regularly – you’ll find it’s not too bad. You’ll be able to run the numbers and get more “prospects” into your field of vision than other guys these days.

That’s why I created my programs – to offer you the best shot at finding a quality woman to make your girlfriend.

Let me be clear about this:

The most important decision a man makes is who he makes his partner… 

It starts at the girlfriend stage, my friend.

A bad relationship will weigh you down…

Let me give you a few quick signals that she’s NOT for you:

1. She crimps or slows your personal growth.
   This one is sometimes tricky to spot, but you’ll notice it eventually. If her needs and crazy bullshit are getting in the way of you being a better man, you better re-assess that relationship. The woman you partner with should be helping YOU move forward in life. Not at the expense of herself, mind you. But she should be thinking about YOUR betterment as much as she’s trying to clutch for a 2 carat ring.
2. She’s not fun. 
   This one is EASY to spot. But the funny thing is that a lot of guys will discount this signal and ignore it.
   Why? Because most guys will put up with an amazing amount of sh*t just to get laid. Trust me, if you’re sticking with a whiney, drama-laden chick who’s about as much fun as food poisoning, you better start working on your exit visa, chum. Fun and honest were the top requirement for guys age 20-50, and for good reason.
3. She doesn’t have your back.
   Loyalty. It’s gold when it comes to relationships. If she doesn’t back you up and wear a team jersey with your name on it, lose her like 1st period French. When the going gets tough, you need to know she’s not going to skate out of town with your best friend. Women project a nice image of wholesomeness, but they are just as sly and deceptive as guys when it comes to getting their needs met. So find one that you can rely on.

So many rules, so many signals. There are way more than 3 of them, but that’s a quick start.

Now let’s talk about the 3 Steps to find a girlfriend you can rely on…

Find Your Dream Girlfriend – STEP 1: Stick To The Plan

By now, if you’ve been reading any of my articles, or watching my videos, you know that you need to have a plan. I give you a clear, complete plan in my Get A Girlfriend program, but let me summarize some of the key points:

• Know what you want.
  If you’re dating with no idea of which woman would be a good fit for you, you’re asking for trouble. You need to know what her hobbies will be, what kind of attitude you want, what her child-rearing philosophy is, etc. If you don’t know, you better figure it out now, or you might be figuring it out in a long, painful custody battle. I kid you not.
• Have A 3-Date Plan
  You want to give her a full 3 dates to impress you. If you don’t feel that it’s a good fit, move on. You won’t know immediately on the first date (don’t trust your first impression, unless she really blows it) – but by the third date you’ll know if she’s worth keeping.
• Stay Away From Bars
  Bars, clubs, and alcohol are relationship killers, my friend. The girl you want isn’t there. And keep your consumption of “mind dulling” substances to a minimum. Stay sharp and frosty. This is a job interview you’re holding on those first dates. Don’t let her snow you over.
• Know what questions to ask.
  Most guys wing it when it comes to conversation. Don’t be a schmuck… you have to know what to ask her to find out the truth about her. You can’t ask her a direct question like: “So what do you want from a relationship?” She’ll give you that rehearsed crap you hear on every lame Match.com profile. Use my power questions from my how to talk to women strategies and you’ll be Golden.
• Forget the “Dream girl” stuff.
  Yeah, I know it’s in the title. I just want you to keep your head on straight. Don’t get delusions about nailing some porn star. Nobody stays married to that kind of woman for very long. Find a grounded, cute girl next door that’s not a 64 ounce can of CRAZY and you’re ahead of 90% of the guys out there.

Find Your Girlfriend – STEP 2: Get Serious…

Most guys that I coach one-on-one have some common barriers that I end up having to break down for them. I call these the “belief barriers” that stop them from doing what’s necessary to get past their B.S.

What are these barriers? Let me share a few:

• BARRIER 1: “Yeah, but…”
  This is what a lot of guys say to me when I tell them EXACTLY what to do to sculpt themselves into a lethal weapon of sexual power. I’ll tell them: “Lose the lumberjack/hipster beard. Chicks don’t like kissing that tangled mass of fur.” And he says: “Yeah, but… I like it/I don’t wanna/I just want to be myself/etc.”
  Look, “being yourself” is really just another bullshit way guys excuse themselves out of the reality that they’re attached to a dumbass view of who they REALLY are. You’re not your beard, or your clingy material attachments. “YOU” is a highly fluid concept.
  Later on you can grow that crumb-catching beard back. But for now you have to put those indulgences on hold. You just look like a guy who’s too stuck in his habits – and has ZERO flexibility.
• BARRIER 2: Won’t go the mile.
  A lot of guys have more lame limits on what they’re willing to do than I can sometimes fathom. If you’re meeting one woman each weekend, that’s not bad. But if you meet three each weekend, you just tripled how quickly you’re going to find one that’s worth keeping.
  The Navy Seals have a rule that you can do 2.5 times what you think you can do right now. You’ve just got a lot of faulty belief systems – and a comfort zone that is keeping you stuck. So drop the self-imposed limits and push yourself a little. There’s no growth in your comfort zone. And the girlfriend you want isn’t sure as heck isn’t ringing doorbells looking for you in your neighborhood.
• BARRIER 3: No Self-Growth.
  Remember when I said that you don’t want a woman that will hold you back from growing? You want to know why most guys don’t look for that as a red flag? Because they secretly don’t want to grow. These guy like that a woman makes them feel all snuggly in their stagnant pool of BORING… So they close their eyes and jump into marrying one of these shrews and realize their mistake too late.
  Start by committing yourself to a path of self-growth. Hey, you got nothing else to do with your time other than bore yourself to sleep on Netflix every night, so why not skip that 3rd watching of Altered Carbon and read a book for an hour? You’ll be ten times more interesting on dates when you have stuff to talk about.
  And women LOVE it when a guy sets the bar for her. That’s her definition of sexy.

Find A Girlfriend – And Maybe Something More –
STEP 3: Get Your Inner Game HANDLED…

A lot of guys ask me what “Inner game” is vs. “outer game.”

Outer Game is:

• Your wardrobe and clothes
• Your grooming
• Your attitude
• Your lines and “routines…”

Inner Game is:

• Your confidence – AKA how you project your own certainty about yourself.

Now the thing about outer game is that you can’t have it without solid INNER game.

The problem is that guys would MUCH rather memorize the words than do the work of getting the confidence they need. But then they just end up realizing that the words and inner game stuff doesn’t really matter when you get the inner stuff handled.

That’s the funny thing about the whole game of dating…

But the beauty is that you can actually get BOTH going – Inner and Outer game. It’s a style I call R.E.A.L. Game . 

And it works better than anything else out there.

If you want to discover the kind of game that makes women infatuated with you after just a single conversation, then you should go watch this short presentation…

It’s free, and it will show you exactly how to get the girlfriend you want… 

It’s all in the Sexual Sparks!

The post Find The Girlfriend Of Your Dreams – 3 Steps No One Taught You appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Ah, women.

If you’re not completely captivated by the female species…you’re terrified of them. Strange how the possibility of getting turned down sends waves of fear even through the hardest of men.

Blame it on biological programming I guess. Back then, hitting on the wrong lady-folk literally meant death. If the woman you had your eye on happened to be tight with the big cheese in the village, he and his boys would treat you as a threat.

Cavemen had instinctive knowledge of how to attract women… sometimes

And well, let’s just say he’s not going to let you off with a verbal warning. (Unless your definition of a warning is “getting your head bashed in with the nearest blunt object.”)

These days, any blows dealt are the emotional and psychological kind.

The Curious Case of Brad the Doormat

My friend Brad is a 26-year-old programmer at a mobile app company who loves sci-fi films and plays a lot of video games.  He also has trouble talking to the ladies. He’s petrified by fear the moment the conversation starts.

I know what you’re thinking, so let me stop you right there…

Despite how Brad might seem at first, he’s quite a sociable guy. He enjoys meeting new people and making friends. He even had a pretty hot girlfriend not too long ago – and that’s actually where the problem started. Brad had been in a relationship with this girl for over a couple of years and things were going great.

That is, until she decided to cheat on him with some jock-looking dude who swept her off her feet. Brad was shattered to the core, as any guy would be in his shoes.

Don’t despair…

It’s not that the jerk that his girl ran off with was “better” than him.  It turned out they’d drifted apart for some time and her cheating was just the final nail in the coffin.

In any case, it really did a number on Brad. He’d built his life around their relationship, so he had a hard time starting over. It was especially difficult meeting new women, especially with starting a conversation with them.

Some part of Brad was afraid of messing up again, so he became a super needy, “yes man”version of himself. As a result, he’d crumble at the first sign of resistance.  Either that, or he’d end up going a few dates with someone until she’d gotten enough free dinners and gifts before kicking him to the curb.

Awakening Your Inner Alpha

It was at this point that I stepped in. After watching Brad walk out of one dating minefield and straight into another, I knew I had to rebuild him from the ground up. The fear of women giving you a hard time or rejecting you is a nothing more than psychological hang-up. And if you can’t find a way to get over this mental block around women, they’re going to walk all over you and eat you alive.

But it’s not because women have some grand diabolical scheme to persecute guys.

When a woman puts up an attitude, or seems she’s being vicious on purpose … the truth is that she’s putting you through a screening process for her own protection.

Whoah buddy…

She’s not about to just let any random schmuck in her pants, no matter how attracted she is to him. And the fact that she considers you as a “candidate” means that you already have a shot. Your job is to NOT mess it up by choking at a crucial moment.

Going back my “earlier days” example, women had to choose the right mate, or else they’d be screwed.  They needed a partner that could stand alongside them and brave the big bad world with her and their future offspring.

So if you react in a non-alpha way with your words, actions or behavior, her survival instincts will tell her to give you the boot.

So the real trick is not to shrivel up when a girl gives you crap after trying to hit on her. But it’s not a simple matter of telling yourself NOT to freak out when the moment comes. You need to make some changes on a deeper level to develop a backbone in the dating world.

So let’s get down to it…

Just Break the Damn Ice

Think of talking to women as bungee jumping: the longer you hesitate, the LESS you want to step off the edge.

The most common problem guys have with taking that leap is overthinking the what-ifs.

You might be telling yourself:

• – “What if she doesn’t like me?”
• – “What if she laughs in my face?”
• – “What if she acts like a total bitch and shoots me down in front of everyone?”
• – “What if we don’t gel and the conversation becomes super awkward?”

I can guarantee you ALL guys have gone through this to some degree. But clearly it hasn’t stopped SOME of them from picking up women and even getting laid.

So don’t stress out about how to get a conversation started.  Contrary to popular belief, there is no perfect pickup like or opener – in fact, it’s better that you DON’T have pre-packaged material.

Before I drop the mic…

There might have been a time when that artificial stuff worked, but thanks to the internet, women have caught on. They’re going to smell that stilted dialogue a mile away. Keep it organic instead and pick a topic to talk about.

It may be something as inane as the weather if you’re outside, or the weird way the oranges are stacked at the grocery aisle (seriously – that’s how I got a girl’s number before). Make a funny comment, offer your opinion or simply make an observation.

That last one works pretty well, especially if you say something like, “You strike me as someone who hates 80s covers” or an equally cheeky statement that elicits a response from her. You just need to find a topic as a springboard for other topics later on.

What matters is you don’t think about it too much and just get your foot in the door, so to speak. I’m aware you’re STILL worried about things going south, but we’ll deal with that later on.

Right now, try to remember that this whole talking and flirting deal is a GAME anyway, so you should treat it as such.

Controlling attraction is the answer…

Have a little faith in yourself that you can power through those typical snags guys hit when starting out.

Let’s go a little deeper and move on, shall we?

Be Funny

Easier said than done, I know. But there’s no way around this if you want to catch a girl’s attention.The good news is that it’s also not as hard as you think. I suggest you watch some videos of funny guys in movies and standup sets.

I’m not saying you have to be a Jim Carrey or Dave Chappelle clone – that would be sad and cringe-worthy. What I want you to do is to get a feel of the different styles out there, and how humor and comic timing work.

Observe how the greats point something out from a situation and exaggerate it to a ridiculous degree.

Going extreme can really amp up the attraction…

You’ll find a particular approach that resonates with you, and you should emulate (read: NOT imitate) that. No matter what style you have, you need to have ONE to begin with. Again, don’t worry if your brand of humor doesn’t click with a particular girl.

There are a hundred different reasons (most of which have nothing do to with you) why she didn’t laugh at your clever 90s Seinfeld reference.

She might be having a crap day, her pet plant died, her boss might have chewed her out just a couple of hours earlier, or she just might be a mean person. It doesn’t matter – It just means it wasn’t meant to be and your time is better spent on someone else.

Nothing personal.

And when you jokes DO click with a certain girl, the rest of conversation will take care of itself.

She’s there for you…

She is out there, and you just need to find someone who will “get it.” Like your opener, jokes are just a means to an end – which is getting her guard down and making a connection.

Side note: Try not to use humor that’s too dark or heavy. Comedians like Jimmy Carr are masters at this, but it’s definitely NOT for everyone. It takes a level of familiarity before unleashing this kind of stuff on someone. Save it for much later when you’re sure she won’t freak out – and use it sparingly even then.

Be Shameless

Ok, don’t get me wrong. Acting like a douche, making overtly sexual jokes and getting too handsy will earn you a well-deserved slap in the face.

But on the other side of the pickup spectrum, don’t be so damn apologetic about yourself either.

Look, I know she’s hot and all, but that doesn’t give her a license to judge or talk down to you. Nor does it mean you should waive your right to having an opinion – even if it doesn’t line up with hers.

The hottest couples I know RARELY agree on most things. What keeps them going is the RESPECT they have for their differences, and you need to establish that as early as now.

Which means you shouldn’t be afraid to be REAL with a girl. Again, you can do this without being an actual jerk about it.

Here are some examples:

• – If your passion is building model cars in your basement, don’t act like you have the plague. When she asks you about your hobbies, answer honestly with a smile and be HAPPY about it. How she reacts to it is up to HER, not you.
• – NEVER be sorry about anything if you haven’t crossed any lines (i.e. being creepy, getting too personal, using inappropriate language, etc.).
• – Here are some low-value statements that lower her respect and kill any attraction she has for you: “I’m sorry I’m not your type”, “I’m sorry I’m not a dog person, I hope that doesn’t turn you off”, “I’m sorry for talking to you, I didn’t mean to bother you.”
• – Be upfront about your intentions. You don’t have to spell it out exactly, but the way you present yourself and communicate with her should tell her what direction you want to take with her (i.e. NOT taking the “let’s just be friends” route).
• – Don’t be surprised that women ALSO hate it when a guy would rather hide his feelings of attraction instead of coming out with it. If your goal is to get a date with her, accept that the possibility of a “no” comes with the territory.

Be a (little) Smart-ass

This is the perfect antidote to spinelessness. You may think that you don’t have it in you, but you never know until you try pushing back a little.

Women are 100% more likely to respect you for holding your ground and keeping your dignity – even if you’re being treated like crap. For women with a sweeter disposition, putting yourself out there (even if you’re terrified!) and being a decent human being to them is more than ENOUGH.

(And mind you, I’m not talking about the entitled I’m-such-a-nice-guy-why-don’t-you-love-me kind of decent).

The fact that you’re making the first move, trying to be funny and basically putting in the work will already get you in their good graces.

She’s yours for the taking…

But some women are a little feisty and have more bite than bark.  And fewer still are full-blown bitchy.

Like I said, it doesn’t matter. In cases like those, your basic strategy is to keep your dignity and NEVER let her see you bleed – regardless of the outcome.

Attachment to outcome is what does a man in. The less you care about it, the more liberated you’ll be.  But it takes experience to get to that higher state of mind, so you better buckle up and rack up those miles.

Trust me – it’s a fun ride if you embrace the chaos.

Right now, you’re probably thinking, “Wow, thanks a bunch Carlos, you’ve cured me. All I have to do is tell myself not to be a wuss, and I’ll have the confidence of a Black Ops Marine.”

Chill, man. I got you covered.

Here are some tips to help you survive a particularly unpleasant encounter:

• – Don’t ever try to defend or justify yourself to her. This is a close cousin to not apologizing unnecessarily, and the point is not allowing her nasty words to have leverage over you.
• – When she says, “Nice Star Wars” shirt, I bet all the girls are begging you take them home,” don’t act all hurt and try to “correct” her. You LOSE if you snap back with, “Excuse me, Star Wars happens to be one of the greatest sci-fi stories of all time and anyone who’s cultured will have some appreciation of it.”  
• – Stay in the game. It’s all about returning her serve, so lob that zinger right back and put the ball in her court. The best way to handle that Star Wars remark is by taking it to a ridiculous level: “Yeah, I’m the galaxy’s biggest stud, no doubt.”
• – Turn the tables on her by taking it further. Now, she might try to keep you on your toes with another condescending quip like, “Sorry, I don’t find sci-fi geeks attractive at all”, so you just recalibrate that reality with a statement of your own. “Well, don’t diss it ‘til you’ve tried it. Besides, millions of Big Bang Theory fans don’t have a problem with sexy geeks.”
• – She might take a jab at your appearance like your thinning hairline or bulging mid-section, to which you say respectively, “Yeah, balding is awesome – who needs all that wind resistance anyway?” and “What’s wrong with having more of me to love?”
• – Stay the course. Once you’ve gone down this path, don’t back down now. Keep up the verbal wordplay even if she ends up leaving. Finish the game strong and let it be a character-building moment.

Speaking of which…

Lose Graciously

So maybe it’s really not working out and she simply refuses to be won over.  It’s no big deal. No one will fault you for employing a dignified exit strategy.

You can lick your wounds when you get home. In the meantime, just finish things off with “Thanks for your time anyway, it was nice talking to you” and remove yourself from the situation.

Unloading your frustration on her will make a less-than-ideal scenario into a legitimately BAD one.

It helps to think of it this way:

Your goal isn’t to find The One Girl Destined For You.

You’re just here for the ride, so enjoy it.  If you do get a serious relationship out of it, that’s not worth thinking about until MUCH later on.

You can play coy, my dear…

Your immediate priority is getting your inner game sorted out and not being a doormat to women. 

And that takes us to the last part…

Rock-Solid Confidence Is a MUST

Obviously, I can’t hope to cover this entire topic right here and now. But this is important stuff because having a spine means believing in yourself.

If you felt you were lacking or defective in some way, this is 100% going to mess with your game.  You can “fake it til you make it” all you want, but the “making it” part is about developing good old-fashioned self-confidence.

That doesn’t mean though you have to hold off on interacting with women while you work on this part of yourself.

Yeah, that’s one thumbs up buddy

You can still build up that in-field experience while learning about the basics of being more confident.

Here are some basics to help you get started:

• – Think about the positives. Make a simple list of the stuff you’re naturally good at, and any interests and hobbies that make you, YOU. Also include stuff you’ve done in the past that a made a difference or impacted people positively. Having pride in who you are is a good start and a basic building block of confidence.
• – Deal with your hang–ups. I’m not trying to be your shrink or anything, but I want you to think about experiences growing up that might have shaped that narrative you have about yourself. People like your family, friends, classmates, ex-partners (like in Brad’s case) have an effect on your confidence and it’s important to acknowledge this.
• – Put an action plan down in writing. Maybe there’s a particular area in your life you’re not feeling great about, so come up with a list actionable items to help you work on it.Whether it’s being better at sports, playing music or being the world’s best hotdog eater, create a path to follow with milestones along the way (kidding about the last one of course). The more you check off these items off the list, the greater your confidence will grow.
• – Don’t be a slob. It’s sad to see a lot of guys not feeling 100% about themselves because of something they could totally prevent. You don’t have to look like Brad Pitt or George Clooney, but there’s no excuse for being out of shape and poor hygiene. That, and eating healthy (or at least trying to) are totally under your control.
• – Handle the Essentials. Even the basics like taking a shower, smelling good, brushing your teeth and having a sense of style will give you serious boost before you leave your place. Confidence is NOT worrying about these things when you’re dealing with other people – women included.
• – Get your Z’s. And while we’re on the topic of health, get your sleep life in order – your waking hours depend on it. Look up how to keep your circadian rhythm in harmony. The better you rest, the more stuff you get done in the day!

Hey, I know all of this is a lot to take in, but trust me that this will put you on the right path to unleashing the Awesome Alpha Dude in you.

When you cultivate a solid personality that comes from a place of fearless authenticity, women will sense that and respect you.

This could be your lap, man

Now, I also happen to have a FREE CD that will help you along your journey. It’s a great guide that takes everything we’ve just talked about now, and ACCELERATE your progress like crazy!

It’s my gift to you that’ll help you create an unshakable masculine core that will have women fighting over you.

Forget about grovelling to win their approval – this will flip the script by blasting away any trace of insecurity in your system!

Check it out NOW – CLICK HERE

The post How to Attract Women (by Growing Your Spine) appeared first on How To Win With Women.

It’s easy to get caught up in “the perfect thing to say” that’s going to sweep her right off her feet. But what if that’s not nearly as important as you think?

What if the importance of your words is dwarfed by something that will make her actually feel something?

What if the way that you physically touch her, and how often you do it, is actually way more crucial to your success?

Why Touch Matters So Much

Scientific studies from the Southern Illinois School of Medicine and McMaster University in Toronto tell us that women have TWICE the amount of nerve receptors in their skin as men, and that these receptors are more tightly-packed together.

This means that women feel touch to their skin at least 2x more than men. According to researchers it could even be as high as 10x.

With these kinds of numbers, it’s an important skill to know and master.

Especially when you first meet her, how often and how much you touch her is going to determine how attracted and turned on you can make her.

It’s also going to affect how connected she feels to you, and whether or not she trusts you.

Here’s why.

The Chemical in Her Body that Turns Her On

When you touch her, you’re releasing a hormone inside her called “oxytocin.”

This has been called by researchers the “love” or “bliss” hormone, because it affects the part of your brain that makes you feel trust and connection with someone.

Think about it.

When someone hugs you or holds you close, don’t you feel some kind of comfort? Even when someone simply touches your arm in conversation, it gives you an indescribable, great feeling.

This is oxytocin being released.

Why This is So Important

The idea that: a) what you say to her and b) how you say it are the only things that turn her on can mess with every guy’s head.

If you’re a shyer/more introverted guy, you may think you have to speak up more and be louder and more dominant in conversation.

For guys who are more outgoing and naturally talkative, you may get caught up in saying the “perfect things.” Most likely you’ll end up coming off as inauthentic.

These mindsets both take away from what science tells us is staring us in the face:

Creating a physical connection through touch is the fastest, most sure-fire way for you to relax her, build trust, and turn her on.

Not learning the right routine.

Not saying cheesy lines she thinks you could have said to every other girl at the bar.

But creating a simple, but powerful connection through touch, and doing it in the right way.

Simple Formula on How To Touch Her

While this important skill can help you turn her on and create connection with ease, you want to make sure you do it the right way.

The way you initiate touch can be the difference between skyrocketing sexual tension…and her labeling you as “creepy” and vanishing into the night.

That’s why you need to read this simple, 3-step formula that will guide you through the entire process in a way any man can follow.

It was created by an all-star attracter and seducer named “Magic.”

Even if you’re:

a) Almost clueless about this process,
b) You’ve heard about the benefits but never tried it, or
c) it makes you feel wildly uncomfortable to have to initiate contact with girls you meet,

This system will guide you through it.

Thankfully, one of Magic’s students created a presentation on the formula, and it’s free for you guys for a limited time.

So if you ever feel nervous during conversation or you have trouble building a physical connection with girls you meet, don’t walk, run, to watch this presentation.

Click here NOW for free access while it’s still up…

The post Science Proves How Powerful Touch is to Women appeared first on How To Win With Women.

And it’s pretty riveting, to say the least.

I’ve known this guy for YEARS, and every time we’d see each other he’d complain about getting passed up for some jerk that treated women like dirt.

He couldn’t figure out for the life of him why women NEVER saw him as anything more than a “harmless friend”.

The last I heard from him, he was upset over a girl who was getting married to another guy. Scott was pretty torn up about it because he was totally into her and he KNEW her fiancé was an abusive douchebag.

According to him, he got the usual “You’re a nice guy, but…” speech before the woman he loved walked out of his life FOR GOOD.

Or so it seemed.

We hadn’t talked since then and I never knew what happened to him after that. Well, I ran into him again recently, and it’s like he turned into a completely DIFFERENT guy.

And it wasn’t because he got jacked like a bodybuilder or won the lottery. To be honest, he still looked the SAME (expect for the few pounds he gained) and he wasn’t driving around in a Ferrari.

The shocking difference between Old Scott and New Scott was that he now had a SMOKING HOT woman around his arm.

“Carlos, this is my girlfriend Sophie.”

I thought I’d seen it all, but I was FLOORED.

(After all, this was a hard 10 we’re talking about here…)

After how devastated he seemed before, I never expected him to bounce back like THIS.

So, I did my best to hide my utter shock and tried to keep up with the chit-chat. But in the back of my mind, I was like, “Am I in a body snatcher movie or what? This was the Scott who couldn’t save his life to open a half-decent conversation with a woman…”

Come to think of it though, there was SOMETHING ELSE different about him that I didn’t pick up on right away. Seeing him interact with his new girlfriend, I noticed he carried himself in whole NEW way – I just couldn’t put my finger on what it was…

As someone who’s been teaching guys how to attract women and get them into bed for over a decade now, I could sense how he naturally oozed of GENUINE CONFIDENCE.

Everything he said and did indicated this, but it was so subtle that I didn’t notice it at first.

Frankly, I found it a little eerie, but in a good way.

I spent the rest of the day thinking about Scott’s AMAZING transformation – and wondering HOW he did it. As much as I like the guy, I was well aware he was no Brad Pitt or Chris Evans to be able to get a gorgeous lady like that on his own.

When we met up again the same week, I asked him. “Alright dude, tell me how you did it,” I told him point blank.

Judging by the smug grin on Scott’s face, I knew he was WAITING for me to ask him that ever since I saw him and Sophie together.

It turned out she was the SAME chick he was moaning about not long ago. And it was pretty obvious that she changed her mind about getting married to that other dude.

So for the next hour, he told me about an unusual approach he called “Cross Escalation” – according to him, it UNLOCKED the man he was meant to be all along.

Thanks to this unorthodox psychological principle, Scott was able to effortlessly make women think about him to the point of OBSESSION.

As much as I’d like to share the details of his life-changing journey here, I think it would be better if you heard it from Scott himself.

To get the WHOLE STORY of how he changed from a shy, introverted mess of a guy to the confident Alpha male that women CRAVED, head on over here.

Trust me, you owe it to yourself to hear what he has to say. Click here to find out NOW…

And my good buddy has a new article up here that you might enjoy…

The post She called off her engagement for him… appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Most guys go their whole lives thinking this is the most frightening part of meeting women, and that they will be rejected most of the time.

Let’s be real – if you knew you weren’t going to get rejected, would you approach and ask more girls out?

You bet your ass you would…

The truth is that if you know what you’re doing, you should almost NEVER be rejected by women.

That’s why I’m going to give you 3 secret ways to get her out on a date – and probably a whole lot MORE from her.

HOWEVER – I need to warn you that I’m going to explain some really ninja stuff here. So if you’re against using any kind of mind games with women, you might want to move on.

We’re going to get serious and straight to the truth.

If you want some wishy-washy nonsense about “just act confident” – this isn’t for you.

Secret Strategy 1: Keep your head in the game

Your mind needs to be relaxed and clear when the time comes to finally ask her out.

If you’re all tense and caught up in your own head (or worse – in HER head), you’ll give off a nervous vibe that will make her want to walk away. FAST.

One thing you should do to keep your head clear is NOT think about having sex with her.

I know, I know… that’s like asking a guy not to think at all. But that’s something that comes with practice – and experience.

The more you get laid, the less you need to get all weird about imagining this possible scenario with her in bed. And that means that she won’t get creeped out by your dirty-old-man vibe.

When it’s obvious that you’re planning sex ahead of time, you can really weird women out, which is why you have to push that out of your head.

Don’t worry – if it’s going to happen with her, it’ll happen without you lusting after her fun bags.

Another way to keep your head clear is to remember my Golden Rule of hot women: All Hot Women Poop!

Yeah, you read that right…

Every hot girl you’ve ever met has done the most disgusting things in the bathroom. She’s probably even picked her nose – and even sniffed her own farts.

Did that disgust you?

Well, that’s the kind of REALITY you need to keep in mind when you’re in that giggly, nervous-as-hell state of mind. For a lot of guys, this kicks in when they’re near an attractive woman and it simply overwhelms them.

So, my little Golden Rule will bring you back down to earth and make it easier to keep things in perspective.

After all, she’s just another human being.

If you act like a teenager with a boner every time you talk to a hot girl, she’ll immediately tell herself:

“This guy’s a total loser with girls. It’s highly unlikely he EVER gets laid, and probably won’t have the sexual experience to get me off the way I want. FAIL.”

If you think that sounds harsh, well my friend – that’s just what goes through her mind in the split second it takes to reject you.

And most women do this within the first second of meeting you. She knows that quickly if she’s going to bang you or not.

Don’t believe me? Ask any girl you know that has no problem being raw and real with you.

She’ll nod her head and say, “Hell yeah, buddy.”

Secret Strategy 2: Use the power of Response Potential

This is a fancy psychological term for building up tension in a person so that they are more likely to respond to you. Hence, the response potential.

It’s possible to create a state in a girl where she’s hanging on to your every word. She’ll be pulling on you, and begging you to give her the validation she wants.

Most of time, it’s the other way around. When you’re the one seeking her approval, it automatically destroys your leverage.

Think about it. If someone else wanted something desperately from you, would you consider that person as your EQUAL?

In the same way, you’re not going to earn a woman’s respect if you act NEEDY around her. It just upsets the “power balance” between you two.

You might be thinking, “Hold on a minute, Carlos…it’s not like I’m going beg her to sleep with me. Only an idiot would do that.”

Sure, but what most men don’t realize is that they’re transmitting this “message” to women without knowing it. Here’s what usually happens to a guy:

• During the conversation, his mind is somewhere else thinking about the what-ifs (e.g. “What if she doesn’t like me?”, “What if she thinks I’m a dork?”, “What if she says NO?”)
• Worse, he’s acting like she’s the last woman he’ll ever speak to. So obviously, he has to make it work.
• At this point, he’s so wound up with anxiety that he’s practically transformed into a ball of tension. This is very OBVIOUS to a woman, especially with his off-putting gestures and high-pitched voice.
• When she starts showing signs of disapproval, he’ll close the feedback loop with desperate thoughts like, “She’s going to turn me down just like the others”, “Looks like I’m gonna crash and burn *again*” or “Why do I even bother with these women? They’re all the SAME!”

Sounds familiar? Every guy I know has gone through this – including Yours Truly.

But that’s not an excuse NOT to do anything about it. Here are three basic ways to break this destructive cycle:

• On some level, you need to emotionally detach yourself from the end result. Otherwise, you’ll be too distracted and inevitably turn the conversation into a painful, boring exercise.
• Instead, approach the situation with a healthier mindset that says: “I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but I’ll just learn whatever I can from the experience.” This simple shift in thinking will help you have some actual FUN with a girl (instead of dreading the outcome).
• Manage your breathing. Like it or not, your physical self is also a part of the equation, so you need to get that under control, too. YouTube is a good place to start – type in “breathing exercises” (or a similar search term) to find videos that will help you reduce the tension in your body.

Make this a part of your approach routine, and you’ll loosen up around women. Remember, a happy and relaxed attitude tells them that you’re not intimidated by their beauty.

That means you’re in control and don’t need their approval. And when a girl picks up on this message, she’ll be the one chasing after you.

Secret Strategy 3: Use the superpower of FRACTIONATION

Fractionation is a very hush-hush technique in most circles.

What is “fractionation”?

It gets its name from the scientific definition of breaking something down into smaller parts.

When it comes to girls and dealing with how they think, fractionation is a combination of psychology, hypnosis, and persuasion.

In other words, it’s a powerful concoction that spells success for you if you know what to do.

Here are the 3 steps:

1: Build an emotional bond

Using the techniques I’ve taught you so far – and the ones you’ll get from me in my programs – you should have a pretty good understanding of how to do this.

Good conversation skills and an understanding of body language (both reading and “writing” your own) is a foundation for this. She has to open up to you, or else you’re just scratching the surface.

Get her to talk about herself if you want to make her feel comfortable. And this has the added benefit of creating an emotional connection since she will be fully engaged if she’s talking about herself.

Let’s face it – doesn’t matter if you’re a girl or a guy – your favorite topic is always yourself.

2: Build an emotional wave

The best movies and stories all have what I call a dramatic rollercoaster to them.

One of the best examples of this is – believe it or not – Toy Story 2.

It’s a great movie that demonstrates how you can not only make a sequel that is better than the original, but you’ll also understand the power of RISING TENSION.

At every turn, the main characters are being tossed and turned into increasing jeopardy. That creates an emotional wave for us as the viewer.

You want to create the same kind of ups and downs in your conversation – so that the girl you’re with feels an emotional conversation that will engage her and excite her.

3: Use sexual sparks to create attraction

When it comes time to ask her out, there’s no magic words here. Your success will be guaranteed – as long as you set things up right in advance by making her WANT to have a date with you.

I know, that sounds crazy right?

In fact, when a girl WANTS a date with you, you can almost walk away from her just to make her ask YOU out.

Remember: A woman is only in one of 2 modes with a man…

Mode 1: She rejected you in her mind in the first 2 minutes of talking to her. (Actually, it’s more like 20 seconds.) And you’re never getting out of the friend zone.

Mode 2: She wants you and she’s trying to figure out how to get you to want her back just as much.

So if you want to get her in Mode 2 – wanting you – you need to know how to flip her “slut switch” to ON.

Every girl has a nice side and a slightly dirty side.

For the first time, science has isolated the brain-body connection for how women become sexually aroused. And this discovery finally exposes the real reason behind what women SAY they want and who they really pursue and sleep with.

AND why women take risks with some guys, and play it safe with others…

This is the scientific reason why a girl sleeps with some guys on the first date, and with some men she makes them wait through weeks of courtship.

It’s why a woman keeps going back to a bad boy instead of dating the nice guy who treats her right.

And it’s why married women cheat on their husbands…!

There’s a mask that women wear – a mask that portrays them as pure, virtuous angels.

I’m going to tear that mask off today and expose a woman’s dark and primal sexual nature for you.

I’m going to show you how to bring out her inner slut. This is something that most men never get to see – let alone know that it exists.

Some have called this the Good-girl/Naughty girl Complex: either women are sluts, or virgins at their core.

All women have this inner “bad girl” that she can’t admit to (for fear of being shamed and shunned by society)…

…until the right dominant man comes along to awaken it.

CLICK HERE to discover how to awaken the Slut within her….

Oh, and if you haven’t seen my good buddy Chris’ blog, he’s got some great stuff here: https://www.waytoosocial.com/starting-conversations-with-women/

The post How To Get A Girl To Like You – How To Ask A Girl Out (Part 3 of 3) appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Rejection is everywhere waiting to sneak up and ruin your plans.

But it doesn’t have to be so hard – or so brutal on you. You can avoid all the pain and suffering of dating rejection if you know how to get a girl to like you.

And most men don’t understand the value in knowing how to use physical touch to get a girl feeling that gut-level physical attraction.

In fact, most guys think that you need to get her interested and attracted to you BEFORE you touch her – which is a HUGE mistake.

It’s the other way around…

Because there are different ways to touch a girl, and each communicates something different…

But one thing is for certain:

In order for her to start thinking about you sexually, she needs you to initiate touch – in the right way.

Yeah, you gotta be smooth and natural with it. Because there’s actually nothing that will kill the attraction vibe faster than getting too touchy with a girl too fast.

But if you wait too long, you’ll risk her putting you into the Friends zone.

So right away, you need to make sure she’s in what I call the “touch zone.” This is the place where she feels she knows you enough and trusts you enough to let her touch you at all.

In the first few minutes, it’s probably not a good idea to get too “handsy” with her. But after a few minutes of conversation – high energy, interesting conversation – she’ll be ready.

One way you can touch her right away is simply to clasp her hand with yours when you meet her. Don’t shake her hand like a dude – just hold it gently in yours.

Almost like you’re going to do the old fashioned “kiss the hand” – but you’re not. (No, really, don’t. This is enough.)

You simply don’t want to wait TOO long to touch her, and this gets it out of the way quickly.

And the really cool part of using touch effectively with girls is that it has the side-effect of making her more compliant to your requests. She’ll be more in agreement with your suggestions, and you can lead her exactly where you want her to go.

This is because men who touch women are seen as dominant – the Alpha Men of the dating world. And girls are genetically programmed to desire the dominant man.

So when you touch a woman, part of it is meant to communicate that you’re the Alpha of the pack – and she needs understand this message early on with you.

So let’s go over how to touch a girl to create an unstoppable level of desire in her… and get her to like you within minutes.

Get her interested: Touching tip #1 – Be cool, and be casual

The first contact with her should be very laid back and non-sexual in nature.

The beauty of this is that it doesn’t matter what kind of touch it is – it still has the same effect: Her body will release the hormone Oxytocin – which creates a bond between her and you.

This happens below her conscious level of awareness.

You also want to keep the touch short.

If you lay a hand on her, or brush up on her for too long it will feel a bit creepy. And you always want your touch to end BEFORE she wants it to. That way she will feel attraction instead of a burst of “eww…”

Keep it short and sweet and it will keep her interested.

How to touch a girl tip #2: Mind your targets…

Knowing when to touch a girl is important. But just as important is knowing WHERE to touch her.

There are some hot zones on a girl’s body that you should know about:

– Her back:

The small of a woman’s back – just above her butt – is a perfect place to touch her. There seems to be an immediate erotic charge that erupts from her spine when a girl feels your hand there.

The perfect way to initiate touch there is to simply apply a little pressure with the palm of your hand as you’re passing by her.

It’s most convenient if you’re in a bar or club where the crowd already puts you close together with her. You can use the hustle and bustle as an excuse to move her with your hand.

– Her upper and lower arms:

You can start out by delicately touching her hand.

Later you can work up to her forearm. And then eventually to her upper arms.

Her arms are a fairly inoffensive area that doesn’t feel TOO sexual, but still gives her a sexual charge when touched effectively there.

A word of caution when you do touch her:

For some silly reason, guys tend to want to look as they touch a girl. They watch their hand when they touch a girl – as if they’re saying, “Holy crap! I’m touching a girl… This is A-MAZING!”

Don’t look at your hand as you touch her. It draws way too much unnecessary attention to your moves. It’s creepy, and it makes everything feel unnatural.

And you also want to be in close proximity when you do touch her. Nothing looks – or feels – weirder than a guy reaching all the way across a table just to touch a girl.

Eww…

Ready to touch – tip #3: Emphasize the high points

One of the best strategies for touching a girl is to touch her right when the conversation is at an emotional high point.

If she’s laughing at something you said, then you laugh along with her and put your hand on hers. Or touch her on the arm.

What you’re doing is anchoring the emotional peaks to … YOU.

When she experiences something positive, you make sure you’re a part of it. Then she’s going to associate you with it and think of you.

You can also cup her elbow gently for a nice emphasis point.

In the same way, you DON’T want to touch her if she’s upset or experiencing anything negative.

Remember what you’re trying to do with touch:

– Build sexual tension
– Anchor positive emotions
– Drive up sexual anticipation

Remember that you’re trying to touch her just a little LESS than what she wants. This creates the level of sexual anticipation and desire that you need.

Explosive Touch Tip #4: Connect with her when things get serious

Over the course of the conversation, you’ll want to take note when she starts opening up about the personal stuff in her life. This is ALSO a good time to connect with her physically because it will validate her feelings.

It’s a subtle way to acknowledge her deeper thoughts which will make her feel that you “get” her.

Like with the last tip, a well-timed touch in this situation will strengthen your emotional bond with her. That way, her mind will establish a connection between those key emotions and your presence.

Here are some examples of how to pull this off:

– When she talks about a recent accomplishment (like getting a promotion at work or passing a test), offer some words of praise (e.g. “You badass!”, “Hey, watch out, we’ve a got a badass over here!”) followed by a high-five or playful punch to the arm/shoulder.

– Give her a quick, sympathetic “there here” tap on the arm or hand if she tells about a difficult time she had to get through. Say something like, “Wow…that sucks, but hey, at least you got through it.” Giving her a brief, friendly rub with your hand to underscore the moment is another variation that works too.

Remember, this is just meant to punctuate those key moments, so don’t linger too much when touching her. It’s supposed to work as an afterthought, so it registers in the back of her mind without raising any “creep alarms.”

Touching Her the Right Way 5#: Find the right balance

As far as the big picture goes, you’ll have to walk the fine between overstepping her boundaries and being afraid to make physical contact.

One on hand, NEVER be sorry for doing it. If you act like there’s something wrong with touching a girl, she’ll pick up on that nervous energy and AGREE with it.

Don’t give her a reason to feel any shred of doubt when you make physical contact with her. The less you make a big deal out of it, the more confident you’ll seem.

This is single most important attitude to have when touching a girl. The best way to put her at ease is having confidence in the fact that there’s nothing wrong with breaking the touch barrier.

However, you’ll also want to avoid going to the other end of the spectrum. Leaning in too hard into her without a valid reason is going to ruin your chances with her.

The rule of thumb when touching a girl is always having some context BEFORE doing it. Otherwise, it’ll seem out of place and stand out too much in her mind.

Pay attention to her body language cues. If she flinches or doesn’t look at ease when you touch her, you need to work on raising her comfort level during the conversation before trying again.

Joking around and giving her a “hard time” are good ways to do this.

Don’t feel bad or let her see that you’re bummed out about it when she retreats – it just means she still needs a little more time to warm up to you.

However, there is a little known shortcut that will help you bypass ALL of her defenses. Once you figure out how to flip the hidden switch in her head that triggers her Lust Response (every woman has this!), you’ll find it WAY EASIER to touch her.

In fact, she’ll be the one who won’t be able to keep her hands to herself.

But not a lot of men know how to do this. If you’re interested to learn the dead simple way to unleash a woman’s wild side, click here to find out more.

The post How To Get A Girl To Like You – How To Touch A Girl (Part 2 of 3) appeared first on How To Win With Women.

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Texting has become one of the most important ways to communicate – probably as much as sending an email or posting on Facebook. It’s fast, easy, and immediate.

And it’s also one of the most common questions I get from guys:

“Carlos, how can I text a girl and flirt with her? I want to get her interested and out on a date with me…”

Fair enough. I’ll do my best to give you some high quality examples of texts that I use to spike a woman’s interest in me.

But first…

We have to clear something up right away: Your goal for texting girls is not to get her on a date with you.

Well, not directly anyway.

Your only goal for texting her is to keep you in her mind, and give her a little jellybean of “feel good” each time you do.

The biggest mistake guys make is to text a woman thinking that he’s going to be able to start a whole relationship using nothing but texts.

It just doesn’t work that way. And women get impatient with guys who over-use messages this way.

If the girl likes you already, then you can text her almost anything. But if she’s wondering why the hell she gave you her number, then almost nothing will work.

Good texting is simply a continuation of a good conversation between two people who like each other.

It’s not a means to make a girl like you in the first place.

So with that in mind, let’s dive into 10 text messages you can send to a woman to get her thinking about you…

Flirt Text 1: Her: The Deliberate Misunderstanding

This is one of my favorites, because it’s a great tool for getting her to scramble for a recovery – when she really hasn’t even done anything wrong.

You just playfully misinterpret something she said in a way that makes her look silly, or even like the aggressor.

EXAMPLE:

HER: Are you free to meet up on Wednesday?
YOU: Let’s do it… get together, I mean… not sex

You see what I did there? I playfully misinterpreted her proposal in a way that made her look like she’s being forward with me.

AND I also get to turn her down in a way – being the one to say “no” to sex.

Even though she never proposed it!

Man, I love this stuff…

Moving on to:

Next Flirtatious message #2: The Dirty Dream

Women live to be desired. If there’s anything you learn from me, let it be that one vital fact.

And let it steer all your decisions with girls. If you focus on making her feel that, you’ll be surprised at how responsive she can be.

So the dirty dream is a way to get her curious.

YOU: BTW I had the dirtiest dream about you last night… crazy

She will ask you about it of course, and you can just leave her hanging on it. When she presses you for an answer – and she will – you can just make up something about you two sitting on the beach in the rain, getting covered in wet sand and seaweed.

(Dirty, get it?)

Or that you had to stop her from cursing someone out in a parking lot. “What a filthy dream mouth you have!”

You’re breaking the barrier of sex in your conversation, which is an important step to take as early as you can.

And another good text message #3: Brighten her day

Here’s another goal for you: Be the first thought on her mind for the day.

The best way to do that is to send her a little ray of sunshine – in the form of a text, of course.

Here are a few you can steal from me:

YOU: Do you have a to-do list? If so, put me on it…

YOU: Hey, hot stuff… wear a smile for me today…

YOU: You looked great today
HER: When did you see me?
YOU: I didn’t. but I bet you look great every day.

And if you were wincing on that last one because you believe that advice that says you shouldn’t compliment a woman, you’re in for a rude awakening.

If you don’t send her something to at least flatter her a little, she’s going to lose interest. Playful teases only get you so far, man.

Use this one, and you will score major points:

YOU: Hey, I just realized who you look like…
HER: Who?
YOU: Not sure I should tell you this…
HER: C’mon! Tell me!
YOU: You look like Emma Stone… only cuter

Or just pick any actress that’s popular with women.

Yeah, it really does work.

The next text you should send #4: The Good Night Kiss

Yes, on the other end of the day, you should send her a text that finishes her day with a smile. If you’re the first AND last thing she thinks about, you’re well ahead of all the other guys in her life.

Here’s one you can use:

YOU: Sweet dreams… Maybe I’ll be in them.

Close it right – Message #5: Use the conversation ender

A big problem when texting is knowing when to stop. Most guys go way too far and too long.

You want your texts to be short, each of them, of course. But you also don’t want to keep a long conversation going without a lot of emotional back and forth.

So when in doubt, cut if off early. And do it in a way that says, “I’m getting the last word in here.”

You want that so that you control the conversation. If you let her do it, you’re losing a huge amount of dominance in the conversation, which makes you look weak.

Here’s what I will usually send her:

“Going to bed… be thinking about you…”

Or try this one, if you’ve got the balls: “Going to bed… Think about me later…”

The key here is that even if she texts you back, and even if she asks a question, you don’t respond to her. Let it go until the next day.

The longer you can leave her hanging, the better – because it will crystallize you in her thoughts. She’ll have a background program in her brain that wants the answer.

And that keeps her thinking about you.

Great way to text her #6: The Inside Joke

Some people call this “callback humor.” Meaning that you’re recalling a moment you two shared that she will remember.

When you do this enough, she’ll constantly find herself thinking about you.

Here’s an example:

YOU: Had a great time last night. Can’t get the image of you doing that funky dance move out of my mind…

Mention some detail about the date that she can remember easily. Things she was wearing are good, or just some joke you two shared that you can make your private catch phrase.

And finally – the best kind of text to send a girl – #7: The Setup

You want to give a girl an excuse to think dirty, and to misinterpret YOU as dirty. This is like a variation of the Dirty Dream technique – except it puts it completely in her court.

Here’s an example:

YOU: I just got done with an intense workout, it was so long and hard. How’s your day going?

Now you see what I did there, right? I basically left myself wide open to being misinterpreted.

You’re trying to create a fun and playful vibe.

Here’s another one:

YOU: Can’t wait to get off work and go to the beach. What time do you get off?

A woman wants the opportunity to break her image of being the “innocent angel.” Let her take your words out of context and flirt with you back.

Then you get to accuse her of being a “naughty girl.” Give her the license to misbehave that she wants so badly.

BONUS TEXT: Award her points

One of my most copied tactics is the point system. This is where you award a woman points based on her performing to your satisfaction.

It’s like a fish you throw a seal when they do the trick right.

YOU: “So what’s your favorite kind of movie?”
HER: “I used to like comedies, but lately it’s been superhero movies…”
YOU: “Whoah… nice! I like that… you scored 10 points.”

If she feeds you grief:

HER: “UH, points? Who said I was playing…”

You say:

YOU: “Whoops, you lost 5 for getting all serious…”

The idea here is that YOU are the one with the points to give out, and SHE has to earn them. You let her know when she does, playfully.

Not too serious or she can get offended.

The idea is to communicate that you’re the one who holds the power. Not directly, and not being a dick about it.

But in your world, you hand out the approval. Not run around looking for it.

And if you’d like to discover my stealth text messages that make a woman respond to you – even if she’s ignoring you right now – go check out my new program on texting her the RIGHT way.

This is a guaranteed, fool-proof, all-in-one strategy guide to get past her defenses and excuses – click HERE to start applying it TODAY.

The post How To Text Flirt With A Girl – 7 Text Messages appeared first on How To Win With Women.

Uh, no. That’s not what it takes.

But what you have to understand up front is why girls DON’T like you.

And it’s not even really YOU they don’t like. It’s what you’re communicating to her.

The signals you’re giving off are giving you up.

So let’s jump into the 5 reasons why she doesn’t like you, so you can avoid letting her see these mistakes in the first place.

When you avoid these little mistakes, you’re going to immediately jump into the next level with your dating game.

Why doesn’t she like you? Reason 1: Your image sucks.

And I don’t mean that you’re a bad looking guy. The honest-to-gosh truth is that 95% of guys fall into the “oh, he’s cute” range for girls.

Really. They don’t care as much about looks as men do.

In fact, the only guys that care about their looks that much are typically the guys who are looking for an excuse for why they can just give up on dating.

“Oh, poor me… I don’t look like Adam Levine or whoever chicks say is ‘sexy’ this week.”

It’s lame and you just need to drop it.

I always remind guys that looks are NOT as important to her as they are to you.

BUT image is important.

Image is how you’re put together in the big picture.

– Are your clothes reasonably fashionable and fit well?

No t-shirts with dumb sayings. No cheapo running shoes with cuffed jeans.

I’m saying you might need to review your wardrobe a bit, and maybe upgrade a few items.

At least those shoes. Seriously.

– How’s the hygiene going?

Reality check… How often do you trim your nails, your wild crotch afro? What about that dry skin on your elbow or that halitosis?

Get yourself on a daily regimen of one shower, one shave, one trim, and one brush-floss minimum per day, and you’ll jump to the head of the line from most guys.

I feel like a broken record on this topic – but it’s worth chanting.

Really, you’d be amazed how much of an impact this stuff makes on a girl.

– Are you groomed well?

I have a friend who gets his hair cut every 2 weeks.

Why? So he doesn’t look like he just got his hair cut all the time.

He always looks well-groomed.

Sorry, but the Man-Bun was already out before it was in, and you gotta keep the hair under control. I still have my ridiculous 1990s soul patch that I have to trim, and some wild ear hairs.

But dude – I’m rocking that soul patch.

Just keep your personal hygiene on the top of your attention, and she’ll pick up on it.

Reason 2: No connection with her

If there’s one thing that will make a girl like you, it’s creating a connection with her that’s unique.

That’s a hard thing to put into words, though. I mean, what is a “connection” anyway?

Here’s the simple definition: A special understanding that you two share with each other.

It’s the thing that you create with each one of your friends and family…

It’s pretty obvious when you really think about it.

So take a look at the really grounded and meaningful connections you’ve made in the past, and you need to apply that to the conversations you have with girls.

Here are the critical parts of a real connection:

– She feels heard

This might seem like a “duh” – but you only have to be able to listen to her effectively to make her feel a special connection. Show her that you’re there, you’re present, and you’re understanding her situation.

Her girlfriends will do this, but I know for a fact most of them are doing it wrong. When a GUY can do it, she will lock onto you like a tractor beam in Star Trek.

– She feels you GET her

When you’re able to simply repeat back what a girl is thinking and saying – in slightly different words – she will become immediately infatuated. This is one of those things that I show guys how to do in my programs.

Let her know that you can see the “special little girl” inside her act. Every woman is secretly afraid that she’s not good enough, and you can reassure her like no one else can.

– She feels this is special

This comes automatically when you do the other things I’ve told you. She needs to simply feel that your connection is something she can’t get with the next guy that comes along with a cheap pickup line.

It’s priceless to her.

Now let’s move on to:

Why this chick doesn’t like you – #3: You don’t have any confidence

This one’s been said so much it’s a cliche. And I don’t blame you if you just rolled your eyes.

But hear me out…

A woman wants to see confidence in you – because that makes her feel safe with you – and herself.

Confidence isn’t arrogance or bravado, either.

It’s that feeling that you’re a guy who’s comfortably on your own path, and you’re not reacting to every little change in your environment like a twitchy squirrel.

Keep cool, and be non-reactive to women – or the things that threaten to knock you off center. That’s the essence of cool confidence.

Reason 4: You’re boring her.

Seriously, you have to understand that most guys talk about the most boring crap imaginable. And it’s not that she couldn’t be interested in these topics.

It’s just that she doesn’t have a reason to WANT to be interested if she doesn’t already like you and feel attracted to you.

Really, talking about your obscure guy hobbies, or geek interests will not really get her fully engaged in your conversation. Nor will it get her feeling sexy.

You should talk about things with EMOTIONAL content.

Talk about the things that SHE will find interesting.

It’s not hard.

Just talk about… HER.

Ask her questions that make her dig into who she is. The more vulnerable you get her, the more she will be emotionally open to your connection.

Remember that guys are guilty of talking too much about things and facts and numbers and data…

That’s boring to a girl.

Talk about the world of feelings and experience and you’ve just found her secret frequency of desire.

And finally…

The secret reason she doesn’t like you – #5: You don’t know the roadmap

What’s The Roadmap?

It’s the path to the goal that every guy has to know to get a girl from not knowing you, to liking you, to falling for you.

Most girls can tell when a guy knows this map. It’s obvious right from the first few minutes of talking to him.

She can feel if he’s got this path figured out – or if he’s just winging it.

In a way, this is related to confidence. Only this is more like SEXUAL confidence.

Remember what I said about confidence earlier: It’s that feeling that you’re on your own path, and you’re not reacting to every change or challenge that comes along.

The same is true of your ability to lead a woman to the goal of your relationship: physical intimacy.

Sex.

And that’s her goal, too. She just won’t talk about it because she’s too afraid of being seen as promiscuous or “slutty.”

All my teachings – are about helping men meet, attract, and date the girl you want.

I am NOT about:

– Misogynist attitudes towards women

– Using manipulation or deception to have sex

– Anything that demeans or mistreats women

– Coercing women into unwanted sex

IF that’s your goal, leave right now…

Carlos LOVES and RESPECTS women. And my material is ONLY for guys who feel the same way.

Ultimately this is all for your self-improvement and betterment as a MAN, not as a womanizer or jerk.

Enjoy the material I teach, and understand any focus on sex and sexuality is to help achieve the goal that BOTH men and women have in a relationship. Sex is what ultimately completes a relationship for both of you.

So when you know the roadmap to sexual success, you’re serving both of you. It’s a win-win.

If you’d like to discover how to trigger a girl’s “Lust Response“, you need to check out this killer program I put together for you.

I’ll show you the stealth secrets for turning on the “Lust Switch” in a girl’s mind. You can get started TODAY by clicking HERE.

The post How To Get A Girl To Like You – 5 Reasons why she doesn’t like you (Part 1 of 3) appeared first on How To Win With Women.

You can’t expect to lure a woman into your bed with your Magic: The Gathering card collection, or your life size Bruce Lee figure.

Too weird, dude.

(Though, I did hook up with a long term girlfriend by showing off my $150 Lamborghini Countach model… that’s a story for another time.)

The big problem is that most guys don’t know what REALLY gets women hot for a guy. If you ask a man, you’ll get either a man’s programmed response: “Money! Big wanker! Nice Car!”

Or you’ll get a woman’s programmed response: “Be funny! Be Confident! Be sensitive!”

Now, some of those are right. but not as much as you might think. In fact, the real answer is much more frustrating for a guy to hear…

But let’s clear out the “elephant” in the room right now… do you need to be rich to attract women?

Being wealthy indicates power, security, comfort and even a certain amount of exciting energy. This is very attractive to women who crave all these feelings.

After all, there are PLENTY of women dating poor guys.

And that’s really what women want. It’s not the money itself.

It’s the FEELINGS the man makes her experience when she’s around him.

Everything you do, everything you say, everything you communicate with your lifestyle will create a feeling in a women.

So the fastest way to get her attracted to you is to give her the FEELINGS she desires.

Let’s jump right in, and I’ll give you 5 qualities that makes women attracted to men.

(And I’m promising you right now that it’s not about the shampoo or shower gel you’re using…)

Here we go with:

#5 quality to attract a girl is: Speaking to her true self.

If you can get past her defenses and the walls she puts up around herself, you can truly speak to the real person inside of her.

You’ll be one of the few men in her world that understands her. This makes you very significant to her, and will make you attractive like no other.

You see, most women talk about almost anything and everything.

The part that most men don’t know about is that women don’t have a very strong sense of self. They’re more fluid with their self-perception than man are.

Chances are, SHE doesn’t even know who she is in her heart of hearts.

So when you’re able to talk to her and perceptively tell her what you see in her, she will listen to you as if you’re speaking the gospel.

Tell her what you see in her personality. If you spot something worth noting (and hopefully you do, otherwise – why are you talking to her?) point it out.

95% of guys have no idea this works, much less how to do it, so make sure you put that bullet in the chamber.

#4 trait that attracts women to men is: Conviction.

No, I’m not talking about doing 10-to-15 years for bank robbery…

I’m talking about how much conviction you have in yourself.

Your life. Your beliefs.

What this one boils down to is how unshakeable are you? How content and happy are you in your own skin?

The easiest way to do this is to simply start forming opinions about stuff. Not pig-headed and dumb, but just have an opinion worth talking about.

Things like politics are good, but also more philosophical ones as well.

This is the essence of the “Power Question” technique I teach in my programs. You can ask questions that will not only make her think, but also tell her that you’ve got your own beliefs and stand on things.

A woman instinctively knows that a man who doesn’t take a stand is not of strong enough character to protect her.

Another way a man has conviction is that he knows what he wants in life. He’s decisive.

This is the real essence of “confidence” that you hear everyone talking about. You can’t just “get confident” – but you can easily start being more convinced of things in your life, can’t you?

Anything is fair game to have an opinion on.

– Best pizza

– Worst time to surf Facebook

– Favorite TV show

– Best place for late evening dessert

Start stocking up on your opinions and convictions. What’s important to you?

What do you believe in?

If you’re not sure, now’s the time to find out.

#3 trait that women dig: Skill.

What kind of skill?

Any kind of skill is attractive to a girl. For example:

– Playing a musical instrument

– Racing cars or motorcycles

– Being a good cook or chef

– Being extremely good with computers

And especially if that skill demonstrates the following things:

– It took you some time to acquire it. This says that you have the self-discipline to work for something.

– It challenged you. This says that you have the belief in yourself to keep going after the goal.

– It was voluntary. Meaning that you had to make the choice to acquire this skill. Which shows that you are not a quitter.

These are all examples of masculine qualities that girls find attractive.

When a woman looks to a man to protect her and keep her safe, the same qualities that you used to acquire that skill are the same ones she knows will serve her in the relationship.

Yeah, it’s a little bit selfish, but women survive by being cautious with their safety.

Related to this quality is the next one on our list…

#2 characteristic that makes a man attractive is: Dominance and strength.

This doesn’t mean that you’re a bully or a brute, nor does it mean that you have to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger (in his prime.)

Dominance simply means that you DOMINATE. As in, you have achieved authority, mastery, or command over something.

Hell, it could be dominating in checkers, as long as you do it well.

Girls are – by nature – submissive. Men are naturally more dominant and authoritative.

Not to be sexist in any way, but it makes the world work better. This is the natural order of things.

There are a ton of ways to demonstrate your dominance:

– Physical fitness – which is not to say incredibly ripped abs, or 48″ biceps. Just be FIT – which means trading in an hour of television regularly to get some exercise. Just being trim and in shape will instantly communicate dominance to her.

– Leadership ability – Aspiring to manage people is a great way to cultivate the attraction quality that women can’t resist. Fact is, girls sleep with their bosses not because they were pressured to; she did it because she gets hot for men in authority positions. Pretty much every woman does.

– Being good with kids and animals – Yeah, you read that right, being good with kids (even if you two never have any) and fuzzy little critters is something that almost NO GIRL can resist.

– Be DRIVEN and ambitious – This shows that you’ve got the aggressive motivation that she can count on – especially if it came down to survival. Are you a survivor? You should know that before you walk out the door every day.

And finally, the top of the qualities…

#1 Quality that attracts girls to guys is: Social value

This one is a catch-all that encompasses many others. You don’t have to have them all, and that’s the beauty of it.

You can pick and choose like it’s a buffet. She only needs to see some of them from time to time to know that you have social value.

What is Social Value?

It’s how much you’re valued by your friends, family, and people you work with. If you command respect from them, you have social value.

Here are just a few of the ways that social value is demonstrated:

– Fun: Are you a fun person to hang out with? Do you have a positive attitude and aura about you? Being a “Donnie Darko” isn’t going to be attractive, no matter how much you try to justify that mindset.

– Generosity: Are you a giver or a taker? Do you have the spiritual openness to be un-selfish when you can?

If you’re a giver, this tells a girl that you’ve got the relaxed attitude of a man with resources. With abundance, instead of scarcity.

If you’re a taker, you’re not going to be generous to her with what she needs, which is emotional support, love, and a certain amount of adoration.

– RELAXED: This shows that you’ve got a light approach to life. You’re not uptight. Guys who are structured and tense are typically this way because they don’t feel secure about their ability to handle life. Which also tells a woman that she’s with a guy who might not be a good pick when it comes to betting her genetic legacy.

Guys who have an angry, defensive air about them are NOT socially valued. In fact, they’re avoided.

Social value may sound pretty serious when I put it into these terms, but it’s important for you to understand how powerful it is when it comes to your life.

Guys with the ability to communicate social value are the most successful, the happiest, the wealthiest, and the most secure.

In study after study, these guys also live the longest, and typically get laid WAY more than other men. It comes down to your level of SEXUAL POWER as a man.

And that alone should motivate you to focusing on these qualities that make you more attractive to girls.

It’s that solid foundation of rock solid masculinity that women CRAVE, and I’ve put together a program to help you with that. It’s called Alpha Sexual Power – this course teaches you how to harness your inner qualities as a man and AMPLIFY them tenfold.

Click HERE to get started with this TODAY.

The post What Attracts Women – 5 Qualities Every Man Needs appeared first on How To Win With Women.

It’s hard to compete.

So I say DON’T even try… Instead, you only need to know how to navigate and negotiate with her Digital Bouncer.

It’s true – her little smartphone is now her personal electronic bodyguard. And unless you know how to get past her gatekeeper, you could find yourself struggling to connect with every woman you meet.

So let’s dig into these 5 tricks you can use to get past her Bouncer and into her life. (And maybe – shhh…. into her bed.)

First – Do you call her right away?

TRICK 1: Use the “reconnection text”

Let’s say you got her number using my tips and tricks. You used my sure-fire number closer and now you’ve got the digits.

What now?

Well, the first thing you should do is to text her a quick message, preferably near the end of the evening. If you met her in a social situation of some kind, you want to make sure you’re on the top of her mind.

Who knows how many goobers and goons have tried to hook up with her…?

Well, pretty much all of them.

Which is why you need to refresh her memory with a quick text:

“Hey, Tina – it’s Carlos – making sure you remember who made you laugh your drink out your nose… TTYL”

It helps here to use some callback to your previous conversation – meaning you bring up something from your conversation that will make her instantly remember you.

Did you come up with a cool nickname for her? Use it in your text.

If you two talked about her working as a 24 Hour Fitness coach, you could joke about how she should make sure you have a towel waiting for you when you work out the next day.

The point of the text is to do 3 things:

– Remind her who you are – because a girl’s memory is short. And you want her knowing which number you’ll be contacting her from.

– Remind her of the fun she had with you

– Set her up for a future conversation with you.

Boom.

If you can do that, you’re out-performing 95% of the other men out there.

NEXT: After you text her, when do you call her?

TRICK #2: Know how to time the call.

My advice is that if you’ve sent the reminder text, and you had at least a 15 minute conversation – you can wait until the END of the following day to call her.

Calling her that day is too soon, and calling her the next day will let the other goobers and dorks get a foot in the door.

If you met her on Friday, wait until Sunday afternoon. You don’t have any business being available on a Saturday night, after all.

But if you met her on Saturday, wait until Sunday night. And the same for the rest of the week.

But now your question is… HOW do you call a girl?

TRICK #3: Make sure you don’t scare her off on the first call

You don’t want to be calling her up, getting her voicemail, losing your nerve, calling her back again… only to leave an awkward message that sounds like you just woke up.

Yeah, I know you might read that and think: “Hell, I’d never do that…” but most guys do. They screw it up royally on the first phone call, leaving her with a completely justified opinion that he’s a complete loser.

So first of all, don’t leave her a message on your first call. Just let it ring through to voicemail and then hang up.

If you did your pre-work, she has your phone number, and can also look up any texts she’s had from your number. She doesn’t have to be Sherlock Holmes to get that.

The next time you call, if she still doesn’t answer, you need to leave a short message busting her on her inability to answer calls.

A small tease right here will do the trick. Don’t be mean, just act as if she’s your annoying little sister.

“Hey, you… I guess you couldn’t find your phone at the bottom of your purse… again. Anyway, ring me back.”

Or just leave a curiosity comment that she will HAVE to call you back about:

“Hey, I was just out at the store, and there’s a girl here that is your double. Do you have a twin sister? Ring me back.”

Keep it short and sweet, because the more you keep talking, the more likely you are to say something stupid that ruins it.

I can hear your next question: “But, Carlos… what if she doesn’t call me back?”

That’s when you move on to my next bit of advice:

TRICK #4: Get Her To Call You Back With Disinterest

First of all, make sure you’re not calling her at dumb times, like dinner or when she’s probably at the gym.

This goes without saying.

When you leave that message, you have to have a certain level of disinterest in your blood.

Here’s why: If you’re too concerned about this one girl, it means that you probably don’t have a lot of other prospects. Which means you’re probably too focused on this one.

Which means eventually you’ll act a little too needy and scare her off.

Your calls and messages will scream one thing to her loud and clear: “I tolerate and even pursue women who ignore me and don’t call me back.”

If you were out talking to girls every day, and getting numbers frequently, would you care all that much if this girl calls you back?

Nope.

You’d have called her, told her to call you back, and then probably forgotten about her. Because you got busy seeing OTHER girls who were interested.

Ya feel me?

If she doesn’t call you back after a text and a phone call, just text her this:

“What? Playing hard to get already? Nice… call me.”

And when she finally picks up and says that she is busy, she’ll probably say something like “Oh hey, I’m busy, can I call you back?”

You need to show her that you’re not desperate to talk to her.

When she asks you if she can call back, just say “No, don’t worry about it – I’ll try to call you later… if I remember.” She’ll be surprised that you’re not going to make a big deal about talking to her.

NOTE: Losers and chumps make a big deal out of EVERY call they get with a woman, which is why you’re communicating the opposite. That she’s no big deal.

I’ll bet you she calls back before you can…

And when she does finally call you back, let it ring a few times. Don’t pounce on her call like you’ve been staring at your phone screen all day.

Let her experience the joy of uncertainty.

TRICK #5: Make sure you’ve got a full plan

Most guys are running around out there without any idea of how to handle women through their phone. Most don’t even know that you can use her phone as a “black ops” stealth tool – like a remote control for women.

If you wing it, if you just try any old thing that pops into your head…

Or even worse, if you listen to the advice of your friends who likely have almost no game with women – you’ll crash and burn almost every time.

You need a plan to call girls on the phone.

You see, most of the time, I get emails from guys that say: “Dude, it sounds like you’re telling me to act like a jerk to attract girls.”

Well, first of all, how good is the Nice Guy thing working for you?

Not so much, huh?

And the battle cry of the Nice Guy (AKA – dude who isn’t getting any), is that anything you do to challenge or not immediately kissing the ass of a beautiful woman is somehow abusing her.

Women are complimented, fawned over, and ogled all day long. They’re looking for the one man who shows them the secret signal of confidence: Indifference.

If you want to know the attitude of the guys that win with women – and how you can have it…

AND how to dominate the phone using a few simple texts that I’ll show you (for free) – then click here to get started TODAY.

The post When to Call Girls and HOW to Call Her: 5 Tricks appeared first on How To Win With Women.

But eventually, we want to find that one special woman. That cool chick to hang out with – Netflix and chill on a Saturday night.

You don’t want to end up a sad dude who sits at home with a virtual reality headset and a plastic girlfriend, right?

You want to get a real girlfriend with real bumps and squishy parts.

So let’s talk about a few of the basic ways you can get a girlfriend without having to compromise.

And maybe even date a little out of your league…

1. Know what you’re looking for.

If you want to find a girlfriend that’s right for you, you have to know what you want right from the start.

I’m talking about the qualities that make you happy – that turn you on.

A lot of guys make the mistake of only thinking about the physical qualities, like a 38DD chest, or a booty that would make the Kardashians green with jealousy.

All things considered, you only need a girl that you’re sexually attracted to. It’s the other qualities that will eventually make or break the relationship.

So start out with a thorough list of the qualities you NEED for the long haul. Stuff like, common interests, life direction, and attitude towards life.

Write ’em all down, and really ask yourself which ones are must-haves, and which are nice-to-haves.

And yes, even (gasp) parenting style!

Face it, man. If this thing gets REALLY serious, she could be the mother to your kids.

The one thing that most guys don’t consider is how to CHOOSE a woman. In fact, it’s the one thing that will make your life a heaven on earth – or a living hell.

Ask any man who’s facing his divorce square in the eyes what he was thinking when he chose her, and you’ll get a double shot of reality.

Guys get pulled into some uncool situations in the pursuit of getting laid.

Know what YOU want – before you get sucked into something you don’t want.

2. Be cool…

Most guys give off waves of desperation the second they start talking to a girl. You have to relax and let her feel comfortable enough with you.

Most guys don’t realize that a woman is always on alert for her safety around men. So when she dares to go out and mix and mingle, she carries a little ambient anxiety.

It’s your job as a man, to help her feel safe around you first.

Yes, attraction is important, but a lot of guys are still trying too hard. And that doesn’t do much to help her feel relaxed.

So when I say be cool, I mean also not acting like this girl is the only chance you’ll have to mate this year.

Just breathe, be cool – and carry on.

3. Get your look together

Your “look” is comprised of 4 things:

– Hygiene

You gotta brush those teeth, scrape that tongue, and put on a little bit of deodorant to keep you smelling like a clean guy. Of course you should go further if you can with some hedge trimming (for you excessively hairy dudes), and don’t forget the nose, ears, and fingernails.

– Fashion/Style

A lot of guys think they have to be good looking to attract women, which is actually a complete lie. Just because you hear girls oohing and ahhhing over the latest Bieber Boy-Band look-alike doesn’t mean that’s who she would go after in a crowd.

In fact, there was a time when Patrick Stewart (yeah, bald Captain Picard on STTNG) was considered uber-sexy. And he’s an older guy, too.

It’s not looks – it’s how you carry yourself. How put-together you look.

So spend some time at the clothes store getting a good look put together. You don’t need to be a dorky fashion animal, just make sure it fits right, and it gets a female store clerk’s thumbs up approval.

– Grooming

This one goes hand-in-hand with hygiene.

Take care of your beard, your haircut, and even the things you might not think are getting in the way of your appearance. Guys tend to diminish the importance of their grooming, while women tend to OVER value it.

You just need to look like you’re taking care of yourself. That’s it.

Because women know that she can’t expect to be taken care of by you any better than that. It’s her signal of how well she’ll be looked after.

Simply make yourself look pleasing to the touch. You do want her to touch you, right?

So make it easy by looking like a guy that looks touchable.

Pay attention to your skin… a little lotion wouldn’t kill ya.

– Health

This one is easy.

Go to the gym. Get some exercise.

Somehow… just do it.

You see, most people think about exercise like it’s a chore and difficult, which is why they avoid it. The discomfort challenges their tiny bubble of happiness, and as a result they get used to losing.

Yes, as in “being a loser.”

Don’t let that loser-boy voice in your head take control of your life and drag you down.

I talk to guys every day who say, “Man, I really gotta get back in shape.” As if him saying that means that I can now excuse just how grossly overweight and sickly he looks.

Ignore the reluctance and resistance. Find something fun to do that gets you moving around.

And then do it!

Could be basketball, or going to a Zumba class, or even yoga. Just do *something*.

‘Nuff said…

4. Don’t be confident

WTF??

Did I just say that?

Yeah, I did. Because I’m tired of lame articles that tell you to “BE Confident,” or “Exude confidence…”

Seriously, if you could do that, you WOULD do that, am I right?

Yes, we know that women want you to be confident, and that confidence is attractive.

But thinking about or focusing on being confident will almost always make you less confident. You become all up-in-your head.

Don’t do that, brother.

Just relax and stop focusing on confidence.

Confidence is a myth. It’s just the illusion created when you know you can do something.

And fear is created when you focus on “what if I can’t…?”

Confidence is a slow, warm vibe of “Everything will be okay.” And any guy can adopt this attitude at will.

It doesn’t require a course in confidence, or a 30 day Tony Robbins bootcamp.

Remember that courage is not that you feel 100% confident and on top of the world. It simply means that you’re ignoring the voice of doubt.

You’ll find it easier to walk up to girls, and to keep the kind of “confident vibe” a possible girlfriend would want.

5. Spread the Love

Look, to get a girlfriend in this day and age, you gotta learn the fine art of flirting. No two ways about it.

So if you’re going to be a good flirt-technician – you gotta learn that the best way to look attractive to a possible girlfriend is to spread the love around a bit.

Good flirting comes down to just socializing a little.

Sometimes that can be stressful for introverts and guys who aren’t used to it, but it’s a lot easier when you don’t put pressure on yourself to be the “life of the party.”‘

I’ll give you a small hint: He’s not the guy that’s always getting laid.

Be the guy that has talked to and associated with a few people in a party or social situation, and you’re already ahead. People are more likely to open up and draw you in if you are connected to more people.

Plus, it feels great to “play host” and introduce people to other people.

6. Know how to play the Lego Game

The Lego Game of dating is knowing how to connect – and RE-connect with a woman.

This means being able to get her contact information in some way. Which is actually incredibly easy, if you don’t make it a big deal.

You see, women hand out their phone number like she’s passing out tic-tacs at a garlic festival.

She does this because 1) she knows she doesn’t have to answer it, and 2) a phone number these days is meaningless. It’s just a possibility.

So the real effort you need to put in is when you finally call her. Just take a second to remind her of the fun you had with her – whether you’re texting her or just leaving her a message.

Remind her of who you are, and the feelings she had when you were together.

Ultimately, that is what she will use to determine if she’s going to go out with you or not. Is it going to be worth her while?

7. Know the rules, baby

The fact is that if you want to get a girlfriend, you have to know how the game is played. I know a lot of people that hate it when dating is called a “game” – but it is.

What most guys feel like, though, is that they are always the victim of the game, not a player.

And when you feel like the rules are against you – or they’re getting changed every 5 minutes, you can feel pretty beat-up after a while.

Look, ultimately you have to remember that your girlfriend isn’t your life.

In fact, if you act like she is, you’ll probably lose her – and fast. Because once you get a girl in your life, you need to stay in touch with the other stuff that makes you a man.

Having a girl to bang doesn’t make you a man. Having the lifestyle of a man does, and the women will just follow.

If you want a look at the complete rulebook – the complete guide on how to get the girlfriend of your dreams into your life, then you need to check out my course “Get a Girlfriend Fast” and find out what the ONE thing women want in a man.

When you have the rules, you own the game – CLICK HERE to find out how.

The post 7 Ways To Get A Girlfriend appeared first on How To Win With Women.