Approaching women, knowing what to say and how to act around them are all part of a guy’s toolkit. Without it, attracting women would be next to impossible.

But there’s another part of the equation that you need to take care of to be an Alpha Male in the most complete sense of the word.

And that means transforming yourself, one step at a time.

A huge part of being attractive to women is about cultivating an attitude and mindset that help you successfully interact with the opposite sex.

Even mastering the best pickup lines and approach methods won’t be as effective without that inner core. It’s that seemingly elusive quality that makes a man a dyed-in-the-wool Alpha male.

So what I’m trying to say is that you can benefit from a personality upgrade. And it’s not impossible at all to pull off.

This isn’t an overhaul and you don’t have to change who you are inside. I’m just asking you to uncover the best version of yourself by taking that first step.

#1: Lay Off the Labels

This is the first milestone in your personal transformation. It’s a simple shift in thinking, but it will have a profound effect on your life.

Most of the time, we label ourselves without even knowing it.

It’s a very insidious habit that undermines everything we do, and it’s time you called it out.

Make a mental note when you feel that inner voice slapping you with negative labels, such as:

• The Guy Who Never ____________ (insert habit or action that you’d like do more of)
• The Guy Who Will Never be ___________ (insert adjective or ideal state that you strive for)
• The Guy Who’s Always ______________ (insert negative trait that you don’t want to define you)

The moment these thoughts creep in, cut them off like a noxious weed so it doesn’t take up space in your head. Just because you feel the urge to indulge in self-labeling, it doesn’t mean you have to obey it.

#2: Look Better

Your looks are what they are. You need to deal with the hand you’ve been dealt with, plastic surgery notwithstanding.

But the way you present yourself to the rest of the world? That’s different.

Your sense of style is, in many ways, like putting on a uniform. Policemen, soldiers, doctors, and anyone else working in a professional capacity dress up to represent a purpose.

As for the Alpha male? His purpose is to succeed on all fronts, whether it’s social, financial and personal.

Now ask yourself: “Do I dress in a way that represents my purpose? Do I present myself in a way that encourages people to take me seriously?”

This is where a good sense of style comes from.

You can start by making small changes to how you take care of yourself, like eating at least one healthy meal a day (e.g. more greens and protein, less sugar/carbohydrates), drinking more water and exercise.

The same goes for facial matters (i.e. your skin and hairstyle along with any beards or mustaches) and the way you dress.

Think about the image you want to project (e.g. geeky/intellectual, corporate, alternative, athletic or a combination of these) and find the clothes that truly suit your personality. Little by little, replace key parts of your wardrobe until you’ve made a dent into your overall look.

A gradual but inside-out approach to self-care is the way to go. Even just reading up on the basics of eating right, working out, dressing appropriately are effective motivators.

Doing all of this gives you a sense of control and responsibility, as opposed to doing nothing and feeling bad about yourself.

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